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Old 06-26-2014, 04:19 PM   #316
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Went shopping today because my 100% OP did me in. We went out to a business dinner last night and I dressed up, wore a pair of brand new neutral heels - and was falling out of them! That weight loss keeps showing up in my shoes, having now gone from a solid size 10 to an 8.5.

Tried on jeans today and was happy to see that all of the 14's were too big and some of the 12's had more room left in them than I needed. I cannot tell you the joy of sending back size 12's. My lower half has not been that small in memory, and that even includes the extra skin around the middle, still fit smaller 12's. Woo hoo. 100% Op on IP for me.
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Old 06-27-2014, 12:05 AM   #317
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Can't believe your feet went down that many sizes! However, I guess when all parts of us are losing it makes sense. My rings fit differently when I'm losing too so one day I'll be able to fit into some of my old jewelery I haven't worn in awhile -- that's an NSV to look forward to!
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Old 06-27-2014, 05:19 AM   #318
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My coach posted about the stages of grief. In her experience, maintainers kind of go berserk when they realize that, like the majority of IPers, they can only have 50-75g of carbs a day. They really thought they could eat a more standard American diet and maintain. She helps them see that it's a grieving process.

I like that because it feels so profoundly unfair to me some days. My doctor said that with my family history and, despite not having terrible eating habits, having been obese basically my entire life I am probably looking at 70-80% genetics determining why I can never be like my thin, healthy friend who eats giant bagels & cream cheese and it doesn't affect her, whereas I look at bread and the scales jump 5 pounds.

I remember watching The Biggest Loser, being 50 pounds heavier than the biggest female, and being so frustrated. People who ate an entire box of cookies and drank 75oz of soda a day when I never had either. And yet there I was, so much bigger. Not to say I only ate kale, but I got obese eating patently healthier foods and could never understand why.

I think getting my head around the things on the last page, that I can essentially never finish a child's ice cream or semi-regularly having pasta is the hardest part. That going to parties will never be like the old me, because my body really can't handle it even if it's a true treat. That part isn't settled yet. I can pretend it's so worth it to see the scale moving, and maybe when I reach certain mental hurdles (like being under 220, which I weighed when I graduated high school), I'll feel like it's worth it. Right now I *want* this to feel worth it, and I'm not giving up, but I'm not past the grief stages.

Last edited by tamila; 06-27-2014 at 05:20 AM. Reason: "Stages" got auto-corrected to "states"
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Old 06-27-2014, 08:20 AM   #319
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Tamila:
As I've been on maintenance for about a year, I've found that if I have some of the things you mention, I need 3-4 P1 days to "recover".
Part of the reason for me is that when I'm at a party, portion control goes out the window. I'm sure if I had one serving of starch, I'd be good with 1 P1 day but if I choose to indulge, it tends to be more than 1 serving. Eating like I used to puts weight back on FAST. But, you know what? Eating like I used to got me where I was. In order to keep it off, it is truly about new habits. And, you're right, it is truly a grieving process.

All of my friends know I bring a veggie tray to parties (whether I'm on P1 or not). This keeps me away from the starchy stuff that gets dipped. I usually bring a dip that contains ingredients I can control (often a mixture of regular guac and mockamole).

I say this over & over but I think it has helped with the grieving: I have a disease of morbid obesity. It is in remission but only as long as I make decisions to keep my weight under control. There is a reason I chose the IP plan. All four phases are essential. Why spend all the $$ to only focus on P1. There is life beyond the weight loss portion of the plan. And a life of weight maintenance is my responsibility. I've heard Phase 4 called Phaseforlife. Letting up causes weight gain. So many around here can tell us that. I want to learn from others so as not to repeat their experiences.

My body does NOT respond to foods as others. Just as I don't get to compare my weight loss journey to those of others, I don't get to compare what others "get" to eat to what my own body needs. We are all different.

So, that pasta you mention for maintenance? You'll be able to have it. But it will be carefully portion controlled. I don't believe I've eaten one portion of pasta (or most other starches) in my entire life. There are some things I'd rather not eat at all than to have the figurative one or 2 bites a real "portion" gives me.

I have a bagel story (since you mentioned them). At my spinning class, the instructor was talking about taking her husband for donuts on Father's Day. She said she'd rather have the "healthier" bagel from the place across the street. I challenged her to compare the difference between the two (making sure to add any toppings for the bagel) and she was AMAZED that one wasn't necessarily healthier than the other (both are bad for me!). What we have been conditioned to think isn't necessarily correct.

Tamila, this is a long story to say that you're in the right thread, talking about the right stuff, and it is never too early to start working on the mental/emotional ties to food. The cheerleaders are in here, without the fluff and with a no BS attitude. Those of us who are changing ourselves, fixing our health, and putting diseases into remission have no time for all of that. We're on a mission. For me it is life or death.

If you don't have the Beck Diet Solution book, order it today! It is a "mindchanger". And to "win" this fight, we must change our minds. (Every time I type words like that, my head sings: Free your mind, and the rest will follow...)

This is exactly why, for me, I don't believe in the little "cheats" or "changes" to P1 that so many around these boards think are okay. Perhaps they don't have the disease of morbid obesity. I do. I need to learn to follow rules. I needed to learn to surrender the food in exchange for my health. If I make the rules, one thing leads to another and eventually my rules make me fat, sick, and in pain. Today I'm choosing health. Even for the rules I don't like. Even for the rules that don't make sense. I lost more weight this way than in all of the years of thinking other people's rules were stupid. I guess they might actually know what they're doing
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Old 06-27-2014, 08:25 AM   #320
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My shoes finally came in an so I picked my up a new shoe rack as I did not have the room. Sadly I had to return the wedge sandals as I had the black pair break while wearing then on my patio, the heel actually peeled off and caused me to fall hard and take a chunk out of my elbow . I was so very sad, but I took them back and got new boots instead. I just could not trust those shoes again after 2 breaks.
Monica, that is just tragic about the black shoes . . . oh, and, of course, your elbow. Seriously, though, I hope your elbow is okay. That would even show up on the scale for me -- any inflammation at all shows loud and proud on the scale.

Great shoe collection -- right down to the fuzzy slippers!
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Old 06-27-2014, 08:27 AM   #321
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I love that! Early on in this process we were at a sporting event and my 8 year old son came with me to get food for everyone (I was just getting water!). I said something to him about how I couldn't have the food there, and he said "You can have it, but you choose not to." He still reminds me of that sometimes and I think it great than an 8 year old understands something that I need be reminded of! There's definitely a difference between "can't" and "don't."
Aww, what a good buddy your 8 y/o is. That's wonderful perspective for him to have as well. Food = a series of choices.

Maryland Mom -- I was wondering where you'd gone to. Glad to see you are doing so well!
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Old 06-27-2014, 08:30 AM   #322
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Hello All,
I've been back for three solid weeks and 100% so figure I'll start posting here. It's sort of an odd feeling coming back. I'm 100% following my P2 plan throughout because of the issues I had with phase off last year. Not the IP alernative issue at all, but my own. I hit more real food, and more life issues and just went (for lack of a better word) bonkers. So using P2 as my way of eating and not using the diet word. It is going very well indeed. Losses are not quite as high than in June 2012, but they are still great. I can feel the loss in how my clothing fits already.
Welcome back. I'm sorry you have had "life issues," but it is good to see you are taking control again. I remember you -- and your great smile in your avatar -- from when I started. You can do this plan like a boss! Glad to see you are back in business.
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Old 06-27-2014, 08:34 AM   #323
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Good evening all!! Im sorry I haven't had a chance to read up on everyones progress As y'all know my hubby is home only every other 28 days. He has been home and leaves next tuesday. We went on beach vacation with my side of the family. I still have stayed 100%. My weigh in was today. My current weight is 236 lbs. My coach has been gone also due to her having surgery. So we decided I wouldn't have my measurements done till she gets back since everyone measures in diff spots.
I also need to vent a moment. I have tried since march 5x to go out to eat with my family. I am now completely done with trying, too much anxiety for me. I always make the waiter talk to me last. I am very clear with what I need and don't need for my meal. I have not once gotten steamed broccoli without their butter sauce all over it. K I'm done lol

I have really missed all of you....
I'm sorry you're having a hard time in restaurants . . . though you really are better of not going, imo. I used to stress big time, too, and get way over-complicated with my waiter, etc. Three phrases seem to make a big impression on the wait staff, "dietary restrictions: I need dairy free and very low carb." I don't come right out and say I have a medical need for it, but I most certainly imply that it is very important. That seems to get them to comply as much as they can.

And congrats on staying 100%! You got this, restaurants or not.
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Old 06-27-2014, 11:23 AM   #324
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Can't believe your feet went down that many sizes! However, I guess when all parts of us are losing it makes sense. My rings fit differently when I'm losing too so one day I'll be able to fit into some of my old jewelery I haven't worn in awhile -- that's an NSV to look forward to!
I have had my rings resized once and now I think I should have waited except that I was so afraid of losing my wedding set. I have 17 pounds more to goal and I hope to keep going a bit after that, so they will be slipping again, I think, as they are a bit lose now.

So you should be able to wear all your beautiful jewelry because it does seem to go from there pretty soundly. Hang in there!
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Old 06-27-2014, 11:38 AM   #325
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Welcome back. I'm sorry you have had "life issues," but it is good to see you are taking control again. I remember you -- and your great smile in your avatar -- from when I started. You can do this plan like a boss! Glad to see you are back in business.
Thanks, I remember you too! Losing my Mom was the hardest of the things going on. She was 83 and active up until about six months before her heart surgery. She was more ill than we knew and it was a long month in icu before we had to say goodbye after the surgery. I know heart surgery is major but she passed all the tests, we were all so looking forward to her recovery. Going into it as an optimist is how I would ever do something like that. She is in a better place now, where she is free of pain and limitations.
Thinking of going into something hard, life changing, that's why I'm back. The "choose your hard" quote, is very appropriate. I really find phase one or two easy, well defined, simple. Eating out or travel has been a nonissue with pre-planning (get the hotel with a fridge and microwave), buy groceries day one on trip, don't be embarrassed to pack a huge salad to eat during business carb table lunches, making quality low carb jerky, etc. The hardest part is the maintenance. I knew that last time. What I didn't count on was how hard going back to phase one would be, and so I didn't. I had the packets in hand and just could not go there again "not today, maybe tomorrow" but tomorrow didn't ever turn out. My lesson to self, I'm not going back to phase one. I'm going back to phase two in maintenance even if I need to use it five days a week, or more. Not sure why I was all or nothing there, but I know I can do this. I have learned from my errors. Mom's smiling and supporting, I can feel her in my heart.
Barb
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Old 06-27-2014, 12:40 PM   #326
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Thanks, I remember you too! Losing my Mom was the hardest of the things going on. She was 83 and active up until about six months before her heart surgery. She was more ill than we knew and it was a long month in icu before we had to say goodbye after the surgery. I know heart surgery is major but she passed all the tests, we were all so looking forward to her recovery. Going into it as an optimist is how I would ever do something like that. She is in a better place now, where she is free of pain and limitations.
Thinking of going into something hard, life changing, that's why I'm back. The "choose your hard" quote, is very appropriate. I really find phase one or two easy, well defined, simple. Eating out or travel has been a nonissue with pre-planning (get the hotel with a fridge and microwave), buy groceries day one on trip, don't be embarrassed to pack a huge salad to eat during business carb table lunches, making quality low carb jerky, etc. The hardest part is the maintenance. I knew that last time. What I didn't count on was how hard going back to phase one would be, and so I didn't. I had the packets in hand and just could not go there again "not today, maybe tomorrow" but tomorrow didn't ever turn out. My lesson to self, I'm not going back to phase one. I'm going back to phase two in maintenance even if I need to use it five days a week, or more. Not sure why I was all or nothing there, but I know I can do this. I have learned from my errors. Mom's smiling and supporting, I can feel her in my heart.
Barb
My sincerest sympathies on the loss of your mother. I can't imagine how hard that must have been. You sound like a woman with a plan. You have figured out what works for you and what doesn't and why. Now it is just a matter of time. You're right -- you can do this . . . I've seen you.


RE: rings. I cannot wear any of my rings. They are all way too big now. I have decided to wait until I've maintained for 6 months and then I'll get them all resized at once. Until then, I am wearing an inexpensive sterling silver & crystals band on my ring finger. I can't wait to wear my real rings again.
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Old 06-27-2014, 01:29 PM   #327
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RE: rings. I cannot wear any of my rings. They are all way too big now. I have decided to wait until I've maintained for 6 months and then I'll get them all resized at once. Until then, I am wearing an inexpensive sterling silver & crystals band on my ring finger. I can't wait to wear my real rings again.
I have a huge jewellery collection too (besides shoes, lol) because I don't have to spend money on children (our choice btw). My problem is similar to yours. I have to wear a slightly smaller ring on the outside of my wedding rings because they are loose enough to probably lose. There are several rings which I have had to switch fingers when I wear them, and a few which are too big altogether and don't even fit on my thumb, lol. I'm not looking forward to spending the money and may just get those little split tubes that go over the band under your finger to upsize slightly. Maybe that will work...
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Old 06-27-2014, 01:32 PM   #328
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Thanks, I remember you too! Losing my Mom was the hardest of the things going on. She was 83 and active up until about six months before her heart surgery. She was more ill than we knew and it was a long month in icu before we had to say goodbye after the surgery. I know heart surgery is major but she passed all the tests, we were all so looking forward to her recovery. Going into it as an optimist is how I would ever do something like that. She is in a better place now, where she is free of pain and limitations.
Thinking of going into something hard, life changing, that's why I'm back. The "choose your hard" quote, is very appropriate. I really find phase one or two easy, well defined, simple. Eating out or travel has been a nonissue with pre-planning (get the hotel with a fridge and microwave), buy groceries day one on trip, don't be embarrassed to pack a huge salad to eat during business carb table lunches, making quality low carb jerky, etc. The hardest part is the maintenance. I knew that last time. What I didn't count on was how hard going back to phase one would be, and so I didn't. I had the packets in hand and just could not go there again "not today, maybe tomorrow" but tomorrow didn't ever turn out. My lesson to self, I'm not going back to phase one. I'm going back to phase two in maintenance even if I need to use it five days a week, or more. Not sure why I was all or nothing there, but I know I can do this. I have learned from my errors. Mom's smiling and supporting, I can feel her in my heart.
Barb
Barb: My sympathy for the loss of your mother. Losing a parent caused a downward spiral in me that lasted over 2 years so I certainly can feel that pain.
I like how you're making IP fit you. You know the phases well and know you can reduce your weight on p2 (I saw your WL from last week. You STILL lose faster than me, doggone it! )

We've had many discussions about maintenance, you and I, and I figure there will be more. We know it is the hardest part.

Hard for me, too, is the stupid medical problems that got in the way of me getting to goal. It is still in my sites and, the universe willing, I'll be there by the end of the year. I've had to learn not to be in a hurry. But geez...some days I just wish it were different.

My ex MIL used to say: wish in one hand and "poo" in the other and see which one fills up faster (well, she didn't actually say poo...she said sh--)
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Old 06-27-2014, 01:55 PM   #329
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Tamila & Lisa Thank you both for your profound posts...that is the mind set that I am trying to achieve. I am going to order the Beck Diet Solution book today. I am praying that by the time I get to maintenance I can look at it from your prospective Lisa " I am in remission for morbid obesity" love that!!
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Old 06-27-2014, 06:13 PM   #330
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Monica, that is just tragic about the black shoes . . . oh, and, of course, your elbow. Seriously, though, I hope your elbow is okay. That would even show up on the scale for me -- any inflammation at all shows loud and proud on the scale.

Great shoe collection -- right down to the fuzzy slippers!
Thanks I actually ordered 4 more pairs cause Aldo was having a big sale, now I have to step away from the computer and stop shopping for a bit. LoL. I decided I am going to wear all my shoes and instead use new jeans from my NSV rewards, I love fitting in to regular size jeans without effort cause jean shopping was always emotionally hard on my when I was at my biggest.

Halfagain I am so sorry to here about your mom You have got this and we will all be here for you!
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