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waiting for me to fail

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Old 04-30-2012, 10:57 PM   #1
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I just started phase 3 and I'm getting nervous about heading into 4. I have the overwhelming opinion that many of the people in my life are waiting for me to fail on maintenance. That was the most asked question while I was going through this journey. "But how are you going to keep it off? You're never going to keep it off. As soon as you start eating carbs you're just going to blow up!" The majority of this was from my friends who spent so much time telling me why this diet wouldn't be for them, they're not willing to give up this or that while at the same time looking in amazement at the weight I've lost. I guess I should use it as motivation to stay on track but it's also making me anxious. Has anyone else experienced this? I should probably ask, "Has anyone NOT experienced this?". What do we say to the haters?????
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Old 04-30-2012, 11:00 PM   #2
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artflunky I am nowhere near phase 4 but I guess I would just remember the program is designed so you can maintain it for life. For your friends who think you can't keep it off, the best revenge is doing just that, follow the program, and you should be fine
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Old 04-30-2012, 11:13 PM   #3
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Just smile and tell them not to worry about it. They're jealous from the sounds of things and you gotta let those kinds of comments just roll right off you.
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Old 04-30-2012, 11:18 PM   #4
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No, No, No....Girl! Not an option! Washing the negative and worries away!!! Stop considering "when I fail" and flip it around to "when I do well"....You're a ROCKSTAR! We're here to support you!
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Old 05-01-2012, 12:30 AM   #5
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Has anyone else experienced this? I should probably ask, "Has anyone NOT experienced this?". What do we say to the haters?????
OFTEN and by MANY people. Depending on my relationship with them, I most often say with the utmost sincerity "well, I might and only time will tell. This is what I'm doing for now and for my health I hope I will keep it off". Then I shrug and softly turn my body a bit as if to say "this conversation is over". I don't get defensive, I don't explain the concept of maintenance to them, I don't engage further. I just speak from the heart and leave it. I owe them nothing really. Nor am I willing to put myself on a platter for their entertainment.

The truth for me is that I'm a addict and I know it's a life long, day by day challenge. I might gain it back, but I hope not.

Hang in there and stay centered in YOU, not giving credence to the words and opinions of the naysayers. You are far more deserving.
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Old 05-01-2012, 03:47 AM   #6
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Keep Your head up...You can do it....and in the words of Jewelrydiva...."You're a Rockstar!!!!"
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Old 05-01-2012, 06:33 AM   #7
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You know what, their opinions don't mean squat! (I mean those naysayers, not the kind people here...)

I lost over 147 pds in the past year, have been on Phase 4 for a month now and there is no way I've ever going back. I just saw my gyne and she's selling Medfast and, though impressed with my weight loss, made a passing comment about how I'm in the honeymoon phase after losing the weight and that most people gain at least some of it back. I was rather ticked off, seeing as I only see her once every couple years and she doesn't know me or what this journey has meant to me. I am not a bloody statistic!

Okay, that's my vent... anyway, this journey is yours alone. You lived with the fat, you struggled to get rid of it, you have developed a new mindset of health and hope for the future. It doesn't matter what any of your friends or family say. They will probably follow your example.

Having said that, I am finding that Phase 3-4 are about rediscovering what my triggers or tolerances are, and perhaps it will mean giving up certain things, or limiting them to a 'splurge' day. Some people find they just can't tolerate grains anymore, so they don't do them. At that point, nothing is written in stone. You have to find the balance that will work for you long term. It's actually rather scary, but very empowering too.

Good luck!!!
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Old 05-01-2012, 07:00 AM   #8
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.... I just saw my gyne and she's selling Medfast and, though impressed with my weight loss, made a passing comment about how I'm in the honeymoon phase after losing the weight and that most people gain at least some of it back. ...
I would've been tempted to ask if she tells all her Medifast patients before starting them on the program? I give medical professionals the same respect they give me. They have a lot of education and experience but, they're not perfect. I feel the doctor's comment was her sales person coming out. I hate feeling "sold". You've done a great job with your health, losing weight, and sticking with the program, Sewmam!

It's sad that other's don't revel in the successes here because it demonstrates that it's possible to heal from obesity without expensive and risky weight loss surgery. I'm amazed and saddened that the food industry puts so many wrong choices out there to tempt the public with health destroying foods that lead to misery, depression and further health complications down the road.
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Old 05-01-2012, 07:08 AM   #9
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I too am no where near phase 4, but I lost of lot of weight my senior year in highschool and was happier than I have ever been and then of course gained it all back in college because I didn't phase out of my diet and didn't pay attention to my triggers and just lost control. But I personally think that anyone who has stuck to the IP program long enough to lose all of their weight and reach phase 4 has all the knowledge they need to keep the weight off forever, and not to mention the motivation and support from all the people here. So tell those haters that you know what you're doing and you refuse to let gain the weight back. Gaining the weight back again for me is not an option. Just like cheating on the diet is not an option. Stick to the program and in 5 years you can laugh at all your fat friends!

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Old 05-01-2012, 08:02 AM   #10
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Artflunky...kill them back with kindness..'thanks for your concern. I KNOW you are just worried about me but have no fear..my mind is firmly in control and I will be successful.'. Then smile and brag about new clothes that loon great on you :-). I think people fear success more than failure...
You did great on IP and everytime I open this forum it gives me motivation to keep going.
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Old 05-01-2012, 08:12 AM   #11
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I would sum it up with this. " haters gonna hate". Really it's what they do. But I have spent many years trying to ge them not to , to make everyone happy, to make them believe in me.. That got me unhappy with an eating disorder..sooooo..now I let them hate. The people in my life who care and want me to be healthy are on my side. They worry about things like my health and happiness. They encourage me to be a better person. I can count those people on one hand..the rest are just the fringe..
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Old 05-01-2012, 08:39 AM   #12
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Originally Posted by 2Poles1Girl View Post
OFTEN and by MANY people. Depending on my relationship with them, I most often say with the utmost sincerity "well, I might and only time will tell. This is what I'm doing for now and for my health I hope I will keep it off". Then I shrug and softly turn my body a bit as if to say "this conversation is over". I don't get defensive, I don't explain the concept of maintenance to them, I don't engage further. I just speak from the heart and leave it. I owe them nothing really. Nor am I willing to put myself on a platter for their entertainment.

The truth for me is that I'm a addict and I know it's a life long, day by day challenge. I might gain it back, but I hope not.

Hang in there and stay centered in YOU, not giving credence to the words and opinions of the naysayers. You are far more deserving.
I would do exactly what 2Poles1Girl writes. No need to polarize anyone, no need to argue. They have their own demons and w/ your weight loss, they are facing their own issues, in this nasty, divisive way - but that's the only way they know to deal with this. You are a more evolved person.

Congratulations on the weight loss, looking great!!
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Old 05-01-2012, 10:00 AM   #13
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Tell those naysayers maybe they should try IP, that will shut them up. They are jealous.

Congrats Artfunky! You show them!
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Old 05-01-2012, 10:06 AM   #14
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Artflunky I am so counting on you to succeed as your success helps us all and we all need you to do a great job with maintenance and set the trail for us to follow. It will be hard but with the tools you've gained I believe you will win. I believe in all of us! If we stick with IP 100% and learn our triggers we cannot fail!
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Old 05-01-2012, 10:52 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by artflunky View Post
I just started phase 3 and I'm getting nervous about heading into 4. I have the overwhelming opinion that many of the people in my life are waiting for me to fail on maintenance. That was the most asked question while I was going through this journey. "But how are you going to keep it off? You're never going to keep it off. As soon as you start eating carbs you're just going to blow up!" The majority of this was from my friends who spent so much time telling me why this diet wouldn't be for them, they're not willing to give up this or that while at the same time looking in amazement at the weight I've lost. I guess I should use it as motivation to stay on track but it's also making me anxious. Has anyone else experienced this? I should probably ask, "Has anyone NOT experienced this?". What do we say to the haters?????
It's still early days for me, and while I can feel the difference in my body, it's not particularly noticeable to anyone else at this point. So that type of comment hasn't come my way as yet. In fact, only my SIL and sister are aware that I'm 'on a plan', and they are pretty encouraging... even if they are thinking I will probably just regain whatever I manage to lose, they're being polite enough not to say so.

The more I read about IP though, the more I feel confident that it's structured through the phase off process to ensure that each of us learns how to monitor ourselves and keep the weight off successfully. And the 'retraining' of the pancreas supports that. I read a post recently where a dieter in maintenance talked about having her 'cheat days' and how her weight didn't rebound, etc... it was because her pancreas had been re-adjusted, and her metabolism was working efficiently to regulate the weight. I like re-reading Dr. Tran Tien Chanh's book (PDF file): The Unbalanced Diet Approach to a Slimmer You, as it explains somewhat the scientific rationale behind why this diet works, and it reinforces my belief that I can find permanent weight-loss results with it. That confidence in my own ability to keep it off once I reach maintenance will communicate itself to any naysayers. And if they still doubt me? Well, I'll politely ignore them and continue on my merry 'Perfect Weight for Me' way.
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