Congratulations for taking the first step by coming here. I know you want to do something about your weight or you wouldn't be here. If you think you are depressed now, think how you will feel if that 50 pounds turns into 60,70, 80 , etc. Find a diet and exercise plan that you will follow and just start. Check around the different forums ,look at the goal photos for inspiration. I would venture a guess that many of us have felt the same as you do. You can do it. Good luck.