Honestly, I don't even know what to say. I never ever
thought I'd get here... I've been dreaming of this moment since I was... 10 years old? Maybe 9? Well, I'm no longer the "chubby one"
At some point, I'm sure I hit 200 lbs but I never wanted to record it.
Starting weight: 197 lbs
Goal weight: 140 lbs
From my earliest memories, I was always the overweight one. From my photos, I just look like a normal round-faced, rosy-cheeked baby but, actually, that was the beginning of my long struggle with my weight. We moved to Canada when I was 11. I was already too foreign, unfashionable and, on top of that, really fat. My doctor told my mother that compared to the weight of other girls my age, my BMI was in the 97th percentile. I always felt like an outcast in school and although high school was a little better, I still felt so unattractive next to all the other waif-like girls there. I thought if I lost weight, I would be really beautiful and cool and everyone would love me. Typical, right?
The lowest I remember my weight was 165 lbs and that was after working my butt off in 11th grade. After graduation, the freshmen pounds piled on and, even though I made a ton of friends, I was always the bigger one. I isolated myself and never bothered interacting with other people outside my social group because I assumed that no one would want to talk to me because of my weight. Although I was pretty good at faking it (I spent all my money on my hair, nails and clothes), I never felt good enough. I had always tried dieting- from LA Weight Loss to obsessive workout DVDs. I did it all. Nothing worked.
In the summer of 2009, I weighed 197 lbs. I was sickened by myself. My docto told me that I had a hormone problem and said needed to lose weight. In the winter, I took a semester off school to travel. When I came home, I had dropped down 178 lbs unintentionally. My weight loss had begun. From there on, it's been a slow journey. I plateaued every 5-10 lbs and it's tough. I spent too much time worrying about the number on the scale and I knew that I needed to stop. But I never realized that the hardest part of losing weight would be gaining acceptance with your body. Looking in the mirror, I still can't see a big difference. I get complimented and I usually feel quite 'normal' but the problem lies in the years that my self-esteem took a beating.
Sure, the weight loss has helped but self-love seems to be a bigger struggle. I know that the fact I lost weight so slowly helped me become more comfortable with my body but sometimes I still feel like an alien. I can only hope that eventually I'll come to a place where I'm happy with myself inside and out. But for now, I'm definitely grateful that I managed to come as far as I did.
Anyway, thanks for listening. Unfortunately, I used to shy away from photos (still do actually lol) so I don't have any full length shots of when I was bigger but I've tried to get some together for you guys so here are my photos from the largest to the skinniest I've ever been in my life!
And if anyone is interested in the graph where I lose the bulk of the weight.....
How did I do it?
Calorie-counting at times but mostly watching what I ate and small portions. 1800 calories is the absolute maximum that I need. Snacking is also very important (healthy snacking: fruit, fruit, fruit! I love that stuff!) and I gave up soda (even diet soda). Instead, I drink lots and lots of tea. Not only is it a hunger suppressant, it tastes lovely and it's great with a book!
I also eat out a lot so I make sure I have my order ready before I leave the house so I'm not tempted by fast food options.
As for working out, I go through phases depending on how busy my life is. I usually stick to running, dancing and yoga though.
I've dropped from 135 to 125 lbs in the past two months and that's due to eating a salad before every meal. It's just lettuce, carrots and cucumbers with whatever dressing I feel like having (right now, my personal fave is low-cal thousand island mmmm so good). I'll eat a little bit of whatever everyone else is eating after that. Lots of water is also consumed during meals.
I've banned chocolates and desserts from my life (gawd, I love my chocolate). That means I can only eat that stuff when I'm out and I have to be very choosy. I don't deny myself anything though. If I want cake, I'll have a sliver of a slice and enjoy it while I eat slowly
Also, when I reached around 150 lbs, I started eating organic and non-processed foods if only because I was scared about what my uber-skinny, west-coast zen friends were telling me. It did pay off though. Not only did I lose weight, I started feeling healthier. Like I said before, rely on fruit! Fruit, almond milk and tea are making my life right now. I can't wait till summer when all my favorites come into season again.
Thanks for all your support guys and I can't wait to congratulate you when you all reach your goals!