Hi everyone I am still hanging in here. The funeral was yesterday and I should get the ashes back sometime this week. My pastor said this is the first wake and funeral where she actually laughed and felt joyful.
You see Bob wanted to be waked in his Bib overalls, Grateful Dead Ship of Fools Tee shirt, his purple Grateful Dead stocking cap with the 4 dancing bears on the front, his grateful dead socks with the bears, and his birkenstocks or "birkies" sandals. He had his Grateful Dead dancing bears blanket on him like when he usually took a nap. His casket was stuffed with his beanie bear Grateful Dead bears, a picture of me his Jerry Garcia doll and other strange and wonderful things. When Bob told me of these wishes when he had his first heart attack 2 years ago I was not sure I could do it the way he wanted it, but I now see the wisdom because he looked like he was just sleeping and peaceful as he was when he took his beloved naps. He was my big lovable boy and my sweetheart.
We also had the Grateful Dead music playing all through the wake. More than 400 people showed up to pay their respects and say goodbye and our church was packed. I knew my husband had an impact on those he came across in life and served in his vocation, but I never dreamed it was this many people. I am starting a Memorial Fund for him and will use the money for nursing scholarships and also for mental health issues or concerns.
Things quieted down today and I went to church. My pastor Diana said when she saw him in the casket he looked like he had died and gone to heaven and then she said when she looked at each of the pictures of us on the Memory board I made for the viewing she said the same thing.
I had the best husband, the best friend, and a true soulmate and I am so grateful (no pun intended). I admit I am feeling a bit sad today, I don't feel that I am alone though, and that's not because people have been coming around. I just feel Bob hasn't left me yet. Bob always loved being with me and I know wherever he is he misses me but I also know he is glad to be with his parents and friends who have gone before him and also Jerry Gracia of the Grateful Dead, who he really adored (probably they are plucking on their guitars right now). And I know if Bob had his choice he wouldn't have left me so soon.
I know you all have great relationships like mine and remember always make sure to kiss good night, good morning, say I love you alot and let the little stuff go, I am glad I learned to do that in the 12 years we were together because it gave us so much more time to live and love each other totally and be so in love.
Carol: Everytime you post, you say something that just touches my heart so much. I always end up balling through the whole thing. I am glad you conceded to his wishes. We miss you but know you need time for all of this so just keep us in your thoughts knowing you are much loved here!
Bright: I have seen that cartoon and I am SURE my scales try to do the same thing, but my bathroom door opens out so he has no where to hide!
Jello: You HAVE to take pics of your room and post them. I am dying to see what artistic extravaganza you created!
I am enclosing a pic my daughter calls the "unfortunate finger painting incident" That boy is something else! God knows what her table looked like when he was done!
Everyone have a great day. It is cool and very wet here today so exercise will be inside. I am working on my menus since I have all my dinner recipes compiled for the three weeks. I am looking forward to starting this and seeing if I can again jump start my weight loss.
Carol, Much love goes out to you. My Son's Girlfriends Mother was also buried in her bib overalls. She was such an outdoors person and loved her overalls. Good for you to honor his wishes.
Quilter, hoping that we hear from you today. Hugs
Jello, Happy Belated Birthday!
I went to St Louis, Friday and Saturday with my friend that had the tumor. Nothing has grown since the operation and she will begin radiation in a week or so. We really had a good time and shopped until we dropped. First time we have had time to just enjoy each others company in a very long time.
Well, I've got 30 min to get payroll in. Back later.
Carol, you tryin' to make me cry here? What a wonderful send-off for an obviously wonderfully loved man!!! And picking guitar with Jerry Garcia is a wonderful image!
Hm, using the word wonderful quite a bit here. Must say something, eh? Take care of yourself Carol and know that we love you.
Meanwhile girls, my blue room turned out ugly ugly ugly. Just plain ol' YUCK in general. Didn't like it much, can you tell? So next weekend's project is painting over it. I had tried to mix sponging light blue, light green and light purple. I think I mixed the paint too thin or something because I ended up with a purplish-gray wall.
Blech!
Stopped before I ruined any other walls and instead painted the remainder of the room just light blue. I'll try some "better sponging" next week.
Hey Faye, maybe your little painter can come over to my house! I was almost as blue as he was when I got done!
Have to go now. The boss stayed last Friday ... in the dark ... as usual and left a pile of stuff on my desk for me. Good news is that he's at a trade show and won't be back until Friday. Bad news is that he left a project that I have to work on with the old *itch.
I will not let her get to me! Gearing up to go talk to her and I'm thinking I'll kill her with kindness, joke a little, maybe even compliment her outfit.....
Nah, I've seen what she's wearing today.
Well, I'll try to be nice anyway. No need to stoop to her level!
Carol - what a beautiful, fun sendoff! The music Jerry created with the Dead and with his JG band had a kind of quality to it - especially at the only concert I ever attended - that seemed like it could go on and on seamlessly practically forever, the same but always gradually changing... I never imagined it at a wake but it seems oddly appropriate and somehow comforting. Life is bigger than we are, after all, and although as individuals we pass on - the beautiful, magical complexity of life goes on and on and on and those who remain are each part of it, adding to it. The music plays on, and bit by bit we get through sadness, too.
Or maybe that was the contact high, LOL! <kidding here>
Ah.
I had a rough week last week with my PLAN but I'm back in the game! My visit to the naturopath on Friday got my spine straightened out and my perspective/attitude on straight too. I love this SoB diet! Really, I do. I was having a little "leaky gut" going on which is what was stalling my loss & even made it seem to reverse. Needless to say, that kind of de-motivation without knowing what is going on made it hard to stick to my plan last week. Sometimes I was good, sometimes bad. But like I said, it's back to the beloved Beach for me.
Cafe, it's not you! I've been trying to post all day and couldn't get in! Grumble. Fortunately, I saved my post to Word so I could try again. Let's just see....
What Jello wrote...
OK, it's official. My brother just emailed me the info. for the hotel that all guests of my niece's wedding will be staying at in January. I checked their website and yes it has an indoor pool. I aim to be in it! Just another reason I have to get my big ol' butt in gear and make it a small ol' butt! It's a January wedding in Ohio so I'm not quite as worried about what I'll wear to the wedding as I probably should be. Can probably stay "well-covered" and all. But I'm fishing out the bathing suit today and will put it on and stand in front of the full-length mirror.
That oughta' do it.
So along with Cafe, I'm back in the game!!!
Uh, what game is it we're playin' again? I'm so tired of that kick Jello down and make her eat chocolate game I've been playing. Chocolate keeps winnin'. Grumble.
Semo, I'm so glad you had such a great time with your friend. Been a lot time since I shopped til I dropped. I've come close but... Hmm....
Gotta get to work now. We're having torrential downpours with high winds. The drive to work was so not fun this morning. Wasn't that Isabel broad supposed to be outta' here by now? Anyway, I'm a bit late starting today. Good thing the boss is out of town.
Later!
Edited now to say the sun is shining and chocolate is still winning. Who's idea was it to double stuff those Oreos anyway????
Guess what? They're sampling the new special chocolates for fall of Godiva's at the department store just next door... someone kindly came and told me... and I didn't go! Counting small victories.
Oh, Jello, oreos are the bomb. They are SOOOO good. I'm going to eat a couple of those... but first I'm going to lose some weight! And now that this is past you, so are you.
Geez, Cafe!!! Are ya' sick? Do you have two broken legs!?! Were you chained to your desk, unable to escape or even phone for help!??! I can't think of any other thing that would have kept me away from those Godivas!!
Anyway, whatever it was, I'm so sorry to hear it!
Nah, I'm not! Glad you're not either!
Now about those Oreos ....
Dipped in Godiva chocolate maybe ....
So close by that I can smell them and hear them calling my name ....
Ok, time to put Cafe and Jello into Chocoholics Anonymous. Sounds like desperation here. May need to tie them up or something. Don't want to exacerbate you two's "problem" but the best chocolate fix is Dinsthul's chocolate covered strawberries. Only about 10 grams of fat per! I don't even drive past the store because I am too week to not pull right in and get them.
Carol: I sent my son your last post because he used to be a "deadhead" and he asked that I send he and his girlfriend's condolences.
I am two days from vacation and am chomping at the bit. Combine that with the fact that the Cubs can go ahead in the division race tonight if they win and the Astros lose and I am pretty much in outspace right now.
Hey, I was a pretty good girl. My ds and future dil asked me what I wanted for my birthday and I told them it sounded stupid but what I would really like were some free weights for strength training. It's true, that is what I want! I can just see them hauling these weights into the restaurant after the game on Sunday.
Well, girlies, I need to work some more on my menus. I have 15 completed and I am trying to do between 3 and 4 weeks worth and then repeat them.
Have a great day and if I don't get back here before vacation, you all take care and stay OP!
Carol: Interesting to hear that you feel Bob's presence. When my wonderful mother passed last year, I felt her all around me every time I was alone. I could almost hear her telling me not to cry, that she was okay... When you feel low, just imagine Bob and Jerry jammin... I'll keep you in my prayers.
Its been a weird week here. I didn't get to exercise as much as I wanted to because everyone needed me to do something for them! Youngest daughter need to be picked up late from band practice every night, son needed a babysitter for my little slice of heaven (grandson) two days and husband working 12 hour night shifts (read: working and unable to do a damn thing for himself) leaving me with all farm chores on top of my Mom chores. I don't know what these people are going to do when I finally find a job!!
Got my walk in every morning, but that was it. The scale showed I'd lost 3 lbs on Monday, but in a sneak peek this morning one of them showed back up.
I'm not having too much trouble staying motivated. Not cooking a big meal at all last week helped!! I Lean-Cuisine-d quite a few nights and drove dd thru a drive-thru on the way home from band.
I've been watching that idiot Dr. Phil and the Ultimate Challege... its like a train wreck... you are repulsed but still compelled to watch... He has managed to turn the whole thing into a circus. Those poor people... I thought it would be more like when Good Morning America locked the 5 or 6 folks in for a week and taught them the right way to eat and exercise. I just don't buy into the crap about "something in my life is bothering me so much I overeat".... If they didn't have a mental problem before check-in, they will before they leave...
My name is Jello and .... gulp .... I'm a chocoholic.
Lizabeth, bravo to you for even watching that guy! I have to turn off the radio when just a commercial for him comes on! I could go on and on and on about this ... but I won't. Suffice it to say I don't care for him much.
Faye, good for you! I went out and bought my own little weights years ago because I was too embarrassed to ask for them. I even told the sales clerk they were for someone else. Hmm... Note to Jello: find my little free weights....
BTW, GO CUBBIES!!!!!
Carol, how are you? Just know that I'm thinking of you.
Hey all, got on my treadmill yesterday for about half and hour. Watched my new little TV while I walked. It makes it go so much faster. And what did we ever do without remote controls!? Anyway, the plan is to walk on the days that I don't go to Curves. That's the plan.
Oh and have you noticed that I haven't been posting my weight as promised. Sorry. Too embarrassing after my fiasco last weekend. I know I've asked before and will probably ask again ... why does it take soooooo long to lose it and sooooo little time to gain it all back! !!!!!
Guess I'll wander off now. I'm doing this extra time in the morning for OT. Boss says I can "try" it so I have to have something to show for it when he gets back. It's Wednesday and he's due back Friday so I guess I'd better get some stuff done to show him that I'm not just sitting here posting on the 3FC forum....
lizabeth: THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU! I thought I was the only one that thinks Dr Phil's approach is BS! I go along 100% with his ideas about working to get rid of why we overeat, but man he really made me mad yesterday and the day before. HE AND HIS STAFF ARE SETTING THESE POOR PEOPLE UP TO FAIL! On top of that, he is axing 5 of them, so what will they then do? Go home and binge because they don't think they deserve to lose weight or some such thing. I told dh he should be glad I'm not there because I would give DR Phil what for right on the tv in front of millions if they had the guts to air it. Why would you intentionally put roadblocks of food in front of people that are at the bottom? You know, I was a psychology major in college and my sociology prof told me to change majors because me therapy ideas were too radical. Basically, NO ONE BUT US MADE US FAT AND NO ONE BUT US CAN MAKE US UNFAT! BOTTOM LINE! I don't care if you were abused, neglected, beaten divorced whatever. You cannot blame those people for your overeating. They did not shove the food down your throat. Now, the fact that something catastrophic may have started you down that road yes, but YOU DIDIN'T HAVE TO KEEP IT UP! Ok, soapbox is over, he just really riled me the last couple days. I have told him off before and I may do it again.
Jello: Oh for goodness sakes, you have to not worry about the fact that you had a lousy weekend. I will go first to make you feel better ok. I had an EXTREMELY bad weekend and gained 5 LBS! I ate Krispy Kreme, Popeyes chicken, BBQ, Chicken Alfredo. Now you should NOT be ashamed because you ate badly or that you gained. Post your weight, no one here is going to be whispering, "what a pig that Jello is." We have been there and will go there again so we surely understand! As for me, my sloppy eating is keeping me from making my birthday goal and I am not embarrassed just mad at myself. I come home from Chicago and man I am seriously gonna kick butt. We are here for you all the time!
Good Morning to All! The weather has absolutely been gorgeous here for the last several days. Makes me want to get out and run in the sunshine, well okay, maybe take a fast walk. Thinking about heading out to the park at noon for a stroll. Nothing much going on, it’s been a little slow business wise, should start our fall rush in a couple of weeks. I must say that I’m enjoying this slack time tho.
DNW, thinking of you sweetie. Please know that we are here any time should you need to express your feelings, or concerns. Hugs
Think I’m gonna start cleaning up my office in a few minutes, heaven knows it sure needs it. Cough, cough from all the dust and cigar smoke floating around.
Faye, I do know who Dr Phil is but I’ve never watched him. Have fun on your trip and I wished you a Happy Birthday a bit early, thinking it was last week. So here goes again in case you get gone on your trip before I get another chance. HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Have you received you AARP paperwork yet? We kept getting that stuff and I would throw mine away and give DH's to him, it would aggravate him that he was getting it and I wasn’t. Giggle. After all I am two and a half years younger than he is! Ha
Just plain ol' YUCK in general. Didn't like it much, can you tell? 
So next weekend's project is painting over it. I had tried to mix sponging light blue, light green and light purple. I think I mixed the paint too thin or something because I ended up with a purplish-gray wall.
and left a pile of stuff on my desk for me. Good news is that he's at a trade show and won't be back until Friday. Bad news is that he left a project that I have to work on with the old *itch.
But like I said, it's back to the beloved Beach for me. 
Wasn't that Isabel broad supposed to be outta' here by now? Anyway, I'm a bit late starting today. Good thing the boss is out of town. 
Oreos anyway????
I can't think of any other thing that would have kept me away from those Godivas!!
Too embarrassing after my fiasco last weekend. I know I've asked before and will probably ask again ... why does it take soooooo long to lose it and sooooo little time to gain it all back! 
