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Intuitive Eating: June 2014

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Old 06-25-2014, 04:07 PM   #181
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Originally Posted by jensassy View Post
I'm having a bad day. I just met with my IE coach and she is a royal B. I'm not sure why I ever agreed to do this with her. I spent all this money and she continually makes me feel like crap yet she always talks about having grace and acceptance. She honestly feels that the only way this will ever work for me is to have an out of body experience where I've died and how will I feel about my body now. Listen to me lady - I'm having a hard time picturing this - it hasn't happened to me so I can't really tell you. UGH. maybe it was just a bad idea to do this with her? I only have 4 sessions left, so I guess I'll finish them out and then try to just go it alone. I don't need someone else making me feel bad because I do that plenty on my own.

has anyone else worked with someone on IE? I think I've seen that people work with nutritionists and therapists. Mine is neither - just someone who's been there and done that - even though she's NEVER been morbidly obese and has never lost a great deal of weight. I have a super hard time relating to her and vice versa. She just keeps shoving it down my throat that she has worked with so many people and who am I to judge her? I'm very unhappy.
You know just because you paid doesn't mean you should go. That money is lost. No reason to make the damage worse. First of all, pesonality blend goes a long way in therapeutic relationship. Anyone with experience in that will know that not everybody is on your wave length and that's okay. She sounds so destructive. I say cut your losses.

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Originally Posted by Wannabeskinny View Post
The cake has got to go. I'm intuitively eating it lol. I'm not doing well at all lately. I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm rebeling against something. When I was sick I lost 5 lbs and I felt like it was cheating. Those lost pounds were undeserved. I've gained back 3. I don't think in ever going to lose weight. My binging is under control thank gosh but the weight will never go. I'm very discouraged. All my mindful eating techniques are not working, I'm overeating regularly now. I've come such a long way and now I'm going to fail. I just can't win. I exercise more because I want to and then I overeat because it made me hungry. I'm trying to be on passionate but I still overeat. I'll never lean tonnage this.
Okay that's a lot of negative self talk and it negates what you have already done. You have learned to manage this. It's evident in your own weight loss. That wasn't an accident. But it seems to me that being mindful of what we eat is really hard. You have to stay aware all the time. And that can be exhausting. Maybe forgive yourself for not being perfect.

Here's some thoughts....Maybe your body wasn't quite ready to lose those 5 pounds. You were sick, and now your body is trying to recover from that. Maybe eating a little more right now and gaining a *few* pounds is what your needs right now.

My mom just went through a series of chemotherapy sessions. Each cycle she would face nauseousness and would lose weight. Up to 10 pounds. Once the nauseousness went away she was become ravenous and she would eat and eat until she gained the weight back and then her eating and her weight would stabilize.

My vote is you spend some time taking care of your self and recovering before you beat yourself up.
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Old 06-25-2014, 05:26 PM   #182
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@Wannabe,

I'm sorry to hear you're having problems. I have a feeling that if you wait it out and listen to your body and have patience you will understand. Remember the quote I posted weeks ago that was written to a young man struggling with social anxiety? Well here it is again. I needed to read this today, too:

"Take care of yourself. Don't think of yourself as just one being. Think of yourself as a tiny bird that you need to muster strength for. Think of yourself as a fragile chicklet that needs to be nurtured and strengthened. Love yourself like somebody that you would want to meet and hang around with. And of course, remember to do it slowly. Very f@cking slowly. Because if you race forward too fast, you're only going to hurt yourself faster.

And when that progress stops, it will hurt. Progress cannot continue on a straight path forever. It will meander. Some days it'll feel like you went back four steps. You'll start working out for a week, and doing well at school, and then suddenly a month goes by where you did nothing again. Where you ran back into your cave and feared the world, because you hated yourself. But remember, pitfalls are all just part of life. There is no failure. As long as you get back up again and try, things will never be over. So after a month or two months or half a year of hurting again, you'll get back up, because you'll get sick of being stuck, and you'll start moving forward again, and you'll start remembering all the lessons that you've taught yourself all over again, and then you'll progress once more, and then you'll fall, and then you'll hide, and then you'll get stuck, and then you'll start moving forward once more and everything will go on forever. But each time, it'll be a little bit farther, a little bit easier, and you'll feel a little bit better. 'Cause that's how life goes.

The final piece of advice I have is this: Breathe. Every time you do anything, any little thing, take a long breath and live in the now. Try to enjoy the moment of whatever you are doing. Try to enjoy the small and fine details of the process, instead of worrying about results and pride. People don't gift a sh!t. Just make sure to take care of yourself. That is all that is asked of you. Breathe, enjoy, and love.

Good luck. And remember to have fun. "
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Old 06-26-2014, 10:49 AM   #183
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Ok. I did some thinking overnight - it's always good to sleep on things I guess.

Yesterday my coach helped me realize that this past weekend when I couldn't determine if I was hungry but I ate anyway because it had been 4-5 hours, that most likely I was not hungry. Oh yeah, oops, right. So I have to trust my body more. It will tell me what it needs and it's not that I can't calm down to determine if I'm hungry or not. That's not it. I will know. It may sneak up on me like it did later that day but I just have to go with it and not eat because it is time or I haven't eaten in 4-5 hours or whatever. Trust my body.

The thing we fought over, (and even my husband asked afterwards, who were you fighting with on the phone?) was about disassociating my weight with this process. She wanted me to go weigh myself at that very second. I wouldn't do it. I told her I'm sure I already gained weight and I don't weigh myself during the day. It's right away in the morning or never. She said, I had to not care if I gained all my weight back and got back up to 300lbs in order for this whole thing to work. I told her no way in heck and told her that she didn't understand being morbidly obese (because she never has been) and that's when she went off on me -very unprofessionally because she's held a gun to her head over her weight and she knows way more than me, blah blah blah. really sad, now that I think about it. She should be able to handle this stuff better and when I say some things are not working for me, I would think she'd have something else in her coaching arsenal to help me. this is not a one size fits all deal. I'm still trying to decide if I'll continue with her because some of the info is helpful but some of the other stuff is really damaging to me.

So I weighed myself this morning on my terms and I am down 3lbs. It was a shock to me. I had prepared myself to have gained weight. I am not restricting anything, and I truly eat whatever in the heck I want when I'm hungry (except for last weekend which was a freak show) and stop when I'm just right. I do not count or care about calories, fat, carbs, or whatever. I just eat what I want when I'm hungry. I also work out, but not obsessively anymore. I was killing myself before trying to WO 5-6 times a week like a yahoo. Now, I work out if I can and if I want to without any guilt. I'm also really trying to find out what I like to do. I was jogging and all that but I hate it so bad. I don't mind walking but jogging 3 times a week really wore me down. So I'm taking a break from it.

time for me to do a 1 minute meditation.......
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Old 06-26-2014, 11:21 AM   #184
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Wannabe: Im sorry you are having trouble. That is totally normal on this journey or any journey of personal self growth actually. one step forward, two steps back. Just continue to be gentle and compassionate with yourself and try really hard to take the focus off the weight. I know I started to really lose weight when I accepted myself at 200 pounds. It was like a switch flipped in my head and I saw myself as a beautiful majestic queen. Like an ocean liner moving steadily through the water. ( yes I know that sounds crazy) I bought a lot of pretty dresses, started fixing my hair and doing my make up if I felt like it, wearing pretty earrings and necklaces, and looking in the mirror again. I had avoided the mirror after I got up to 200 pounds. anyway shortly after I accepted myself at that weight, my weight started to drop, but the tricky thing is you really do have to accept yourself at your current weight, and not just do it to lose weight. Anyway lots of hugs your way, I have felt like you many times before. Just try to stay aware and gentle with yourself. Don't judge, just be curious and observant about your behaviour and your thoughts.

Jensassy: your coach sounds kind of annoying. I follow a coach via online who recommends daily weighing to help overcome scale issues or equating your self worth with the number on the scale. Maybe that is what your coach is following? Either way she shouldn't try to bully you in to it. It sounds like you are doing awesome though.

I still have a hard time with exercise. It doesn't help that I have a chronic injury that seems to respark every time I really get into working out. I ahd been doing weights and feeling awesome. I have had to stop because of my injury and it makes me sad, but not really. Its nice to take a break. I think that is my personal challenge. How to fit exercise in my life. I started wearing a pedometer yesterday and I was shocked at how many steps I walk just in my regular stay at home mom life. So, that made me feel a little better.

I am still following my breakfast/ graze through the afternoon /dinner pattern. It feels natural and nice to do. something I have noticed that is kind of weird is that if I eat standing up or driving its fine. I don't feel like I haven't eaten. I can tell that I have eaten enough. I don't know if I could have done that before all my practice with mindful eating or not. Lunch has been an issue for me for years. I either eat what I consider a nutritious filling lunch and feel hungry 2 hours later, so eat then and am not hungry for dinner, try to go until dinner and end up ravenously eating hours later to make up for it, or I eat a huge massive lunch that stuffs me and stretches my stomach but I am not hungry until dinner. Eating until I felt satisfied equaled being hungry for about 4 hours straight until dinner. I think mentally by making a nice meal I felt I needed to eat more of it than I needed. I have noticed sometimes when I eat more than my body needs it actually makes me feel hungrier and like I need more food. It's weird. I feel like Im finally falling back into the pattern of eating i used to have before weight gain and dieting/nutrition overload. And I am not thinking about food half as much as I used to and that is such a wonderful relief.

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Old 06-26-2014, 03:00 PM   #185
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Originally Posted by Seana View Post

Okay that's a lot of negative self talk and it negates what you have already done. You have learned to manage this. It's evident in your own weight loss. That wasn't an accident. But it seems to me that being mindful of what we eat is really hard. You have to stay aware all the time. And that can be exhausting. Maybe forgive yourself for not being perfect.

Here's some thoughts....Maybe your body wasn't quite ready to lose those 5 pounds. You were sick, and now your body is trying to recover from that. Maybe eating a little more right now and gaining a *few* pounds is what your needs right now.

My mom just went through a series of chemotherapy sessions. Each cycle she would face nauseousness and would lose weight. Up to 10 pounds. Once the nauseousness went away she was become ravenous and she would eat and eat until she gained the weight back and then her eating and her weight would stabilize.

My vote is you spend some time taking care of your self and recovering before you beat yourself up.
In sorry to hear that about your mom, I hope her battle is short and painless and results in freedom from that vicious disease. Thanks for your encouraging words. I think you're right, that my body wasn't ready or receptive to losing that 5lbs, I just wish it was. I don't want to hover around 200 anymore. I deserve to be able to enjoy my body and have it be free of excess weight. I'm not looking to be a model or even be skinny, I just want to fit into some clothes that I like and not be the fattest girl on the room.

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Originally Posted by Locke View Post
@Wannabe,

I'm sorry to hear you're having problems. I have a feeling that if you wait it out and listen to your body and have patience you will understand. Remember the quote I posted weeks ago that was written to a young man struggling with social anxiety? Well here it is again. I needed to read this today, too:

"Take care of yourself. Don't think of yourself as just one being. Think of yourself as a tiny bird that you need to muster strength for. Think of yourself as a fragile chicklet that needs to be nurtured and strengthened. Love yourself like somebody that you would want to meet and hang around with. And of course, remember to do it slowly. Very f@cking slowly. Because if you race forward too fast, you're only going to hurt yourself faster.

And when that progress stops, it will hurt. Progress cannot continue on a straight path forever. It will meander. Some days it'll feel like you went back four steps. You'll start working out for a week, and doing well at school, and then suddenly a month goes by where you did nothing again. Where you ran back into your cave and feared the world, because you hated yourself. But remember, pitfalls are all just part of life. There is no failure. As long as you get back up again and try, things will never be over. So after a month or two months or half a year of hurting again, you'll get back up, because you'll get sick of being stuck, and you'll start moving forward again, and you'll start remembering all the lessons that you've taught yourself all over again, and then you'll progress once more, and then you'll fall, and then you'll hide, and then you'll get stuck, and then you'll start moving forward once more and everything will go on forever. But each time, it'll be a little bit farther, a little bit easier, and you'll feel a little bit better. 'Cause that's how life goes.

The final piece of advice I have is this: Breathe. Every time you do anything, any little thing, take a long breath and live in the now. Try to enjoy the moment of whatever you are doing. Try to enjoy the small and fine details of the process, instead of worrying about results and pride. People don't gift a sh!t. Just make sure to take care of yourself. That is all that is asked of you. Breathe, enjoy, and love.

Good luck. And remember to have fun. "
You always know just what to say to me. It's ridiculous to think that things will smooth out indefinitely, I will always sort of struggle with eating my feelings because I've done it for so long. I'm not hopeless and I've come a long way. I'm not even Overeating a lot, just enough to keep me at a high weight. I need to learn about set point more, I'm doubting that I will be able to lose weight by giving my body what it wants if my body wants to be this way.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pinkhippie View Post
Wannabe: Im sorry you are having trouble. That is totally normal on this journey or any journey of personal self growth actually. one step forward, two steps back. Just continue to be gentle and compassionate with yourself and try really hard to take the focus off the weight. I know I started to really lose weight when I accepted myself at 200 pounds. It was like a switch flipped in my head and I saw myself as a beautiful majestic queen. Like an ocean liner moving steadily through the water. ( yes I know that sounds crazy) I bought a lot of pretty dresses, started fixing my hair and doing my make up if I felt like it, wearing pretty earrings and necklaces, and looking in the mirror again. I had avoided the mirror after I got up to 200 pounds. anyway shortly after I accepted myself at that weight, my weight started to drop, but the tricky thing is you really do have to accept yourself at your current weight, and not just do it to lose weight. Anyway lots of hugs your way, I have felt like you many times before. Just try to stay aware and gentle with yourself. Don't judge, just be curious and observant about your behaviour and your thoughts.
It's interesting that 200lbs was like a magic number for you, I don't think it is for me, for me it's like a pressure cooker. If I'm over 200 I'm fat. When I get under 200 it's like someone sets up a pressure cooker like "ok let's go go go you can do it!" I start feeling overwhelmed and like I'm starting a race only I stumble right out of the gate.

Stress is everywhere, no idea how to avoid it. The other day I ran into 2 ex boyfriends on the same day!!! One was obsessed and I had to get a restraining order on him... Awkward! The other was what I believed to be my soup mate who cheated on me and crushed my heart into a million little pieces. I know this is all long in the past but I immediately thought how terrible I look now compared to when I was with them. I spoke to neither of them but exchange glances enough to berate myself with conjuring up all the negative thoughts they must have thought about how I look. Who knows, maybe they thought "hey there's the one who got away, she looks amazing" but in my mind they were saying to themselves "dodged a bullet."

Then I went shopping for summer clothes. I tried on bathing suits. Anyone else have seriously longings for fried chicken after they try on a series of bathing suits or is that just me? And there is no bathing suit in the world that can cover up my most hated body part - my thighs. Huge, jiggly, full of cellulite, they are the name io my existence. There is not one pair of pants rightly made for my body. These thighs must be one of a kind, broke the mold with them. I'm feel body conscious and I have no idea why that makes me want to eat, it makes more sense not to.

Argh sorry I'm clouding everything up with all my negativity!
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Old 06-26-2014, 03:35 PM   #186
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It's interesting that 200lbs was like a magic number for you, I don't think it is for me, for me it's like a pressure cooker. If I'm over 200 I'm fat. When I get under 200 it's like someone sets up a pressure cooker like "ok let's go go go you can do it!" I start feeling overwhelmed and like I'm starting a race only I stumble right out of the gate.

Stress is everywhere, no idea how to avoid it. The other day I ran into 2 ex boyfriends on the same day!!! One was obsessed and I had to get a restraining order on him... Awkward! The other was what I believed to be my soup mate who cheated on me and crushed my heart into a million little pieces. I know this is all long in the past but I immediately thought how terrible I look now compared to when I was with them. I spoke to neither of them but exchange glances enough to berate myself with conjuring up all the negative thoughts they must have thought about how I look. Who knows, maybe they thought "hey there's the one who got away, she looks amazing" but in my mind they were saying to themselves "dodged a bullet."

Then I went shopping for summer clothes. I tried on bathing suits. Anyone else have seriously longings for fried chicken after they try on a series of bathing suits or is that just me? And there is no bathing suit in the world that can cover up my most hated body part - my thighs. Huge, jiggly, full of cellulite, they are the name io my existence. There is not one pair of pants rightly made for my body. These thighs must be one of a kind, broke the mold with them. I'm feel body conscious and I have no idea why that makes me want to eat, it makes more sense not to.

Argh sorry I'm clouding everything up with all my negativity!

I just want to clarify 200 isn't what I consider a magic number. It was the highest weight I have ever been and it was shocking to see on the scale. But, I did a lot of body acceptance exercises and eventually they helped and I was able to see myself as beautiful. A different kind of beauty than I was used to but beautiful. One exercise I did that really helped me is to just look in the mirror and describe your body in terms of non judgement statements. LIke " my thighs go out here but taper in here." Another one was to pretend like you have never seen a female body but your own and to look at yourself with no comparisons. That was really helpful too. And always try to tell yourself in the mirror that you love your body. I did a meditation where I repeated over and over that I had put my body through a lot and it deserved nothing but kindness. That one made me cry when I realized that my body was mine and it was wonderful because it was mine and I had abused it for so many years with deprivation, binging and ridiculous exercises routines.

Sucks to see TWO ex bf's in the same day! Argh!! I dreamed about one of mine last night. He still lives in this town but thank goodness I never see him. he is one that helped my ED go into full force because he likes REALLY thin women. I admit I would have a hard time seeing him right now even though I feel relatively good about myself because of everything you mentioned.

YOu want to eat when you feel body conscious because you feel bad. When you feel bad you want to eat because you are trying to take care of yourself.

I have noticed that for myself. If I look in the mirror and think I look bad or fat or my stomach is too jiggly, its almost immediately followed by the thought of having a snack. It's uncanny really.

I am really just trying to help with my words. If they are annoying or not helpful I apologize. Text is so difficult to truly convey meaning.

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Old 06-26-2014, 03:57 PM   #187
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So yesterday I binge ate half a bag of tortilla chips and salsa. I ate until I was full. And you know what it was so good, and I feel no sense of guilt about it. However, I was in a funk yesterday and I'm still in a funk today. I am not so good at recognizing the causes of my emotions, so I'm not sure why I am in a funk.
I do know that I really want to isolate myself. And I feel so guilty but I was so relieved that my husband got called into work today. I did not want to be social.
He was pretty sweet yesterday telling me that he is here for me. But he's not really. Not because he doesn't want to be, but because he just doesn't get it. He doesn't really understand my issues with food.

But I did get the day to myself and even though I am in a funk and I am taking care of myself. I ate a reasonably healthy breakfast. This is a danger zone for me. I have no cravings and no real desire for food, but I am hungry and I want to stop the hunger. This is when I might eat fast food or pizza. Not because I want it, but because it doesn't involve a lot of thought. But instead I at healthy and I'm proud of that. Part of it was that I had easy healthy food available. Bowl of cereal, yogurt and fruit. Not a lot of effort and took care of being hungry.
I'm hoping I'll be out of the funk today. And I'm hoping I can make an easy decision for lunch. I'll worry about it when I get there.
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Old 06-26-2014, 04:00 PM   #188
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Oh and something else: I've been reading "Life is hard Food is easy." She talks about wanted t gnash something when you are frustrated. I was reading a book that was making me angry when I really started craving the chips.
I actually clench my teeth when I'm stressed and crave something that will relieve the pain from clenching. Chewy and crunchy.
And this may sound weird, but a short term trick I've tried that's worked is rubbing a little clove oil around the gums. It relaxes my mouth for a short while.
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Old 06-26-2014, 04:45 PM   #189
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I've been on vacation the past few weeks. Ate more Intuitively on trip and I'm amazed at the results when I returned. We ate out almost everyday and had finger foods at my sisters for the birthday party for my Daddy's 91st birthday. So meals were not always what I would call diabetic friendly. Fasting blood sugar was not as low as I would have liked although not real high either. I was amazed to see that I actually am down 2.8 lbs from when I left.

This makes me wonder if I have been too up tight when eating before the trip. I really lean more toward IE lifestyle, but have so much "diet" knowledge that maybe it has been getting in my way. I knew I was going to be eating differently on my trip so decided to just relax and enjoy myself and just eat the best I could. Perhaps my problem in the past is that I've been "trying" to hard and perhaps "I" have been the problem when it comes to eating. I'm going to work at being more relaxed with my attitude towards food and how, what and when I eat and just see how it works for me.

For one thing I had NO Scale, so I COULD NOT weigh myself at all for 2 weeks. Maybe there is something to the IE suggestion of NOT weighing all the time.

Just thought I would share this wonderful and interesting experience I had with the food and eating these past few weeks.
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Old 06-26-2014, 04:55 PM   #190
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That's awesome, pattygirl.
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Old 06-27-2014, 09:05 AM   #191
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I've been on vacation the past few weeks. Ate more Intuitively on trip and I'm amazed at the results when I returned. We ate out almost everyday and had finger foods at my sisters for the birthday party for my Daddy's 91st birthday. So meals were not always what I would call diabetic friendly. Fasting blood sugar was not as low as I would have liked although not real high either. I was amazed to see that I actually am down 2.8 lbs from when I left.

This makes me wonder if I have been too up tight when eating before the trip. I really lean more toward IE lifestyle, but have so much "diet" knowledge that maybe it has been getting in my way. I knew I was going to be eating differently on my trip so decided to just relax and enjoy myself and just eat the best I could. Perhaps my problem in the past is that I've been "trying" to hard and perhaps "I" have been the problem when it comes to eating. I'm going to work at being more relaxed with my attitude towards food and how, what and when I eat and just see how it works for me.

For one thing I had NO Scale, so I COULD NOT weigh myself at all for 2 weeks. Maybe there is something to the IE suggestion of NOT weighing all the time.

Just thought I would share this wonderful and interesting experience I had with the food and eating these past few weeks.
That's amazing! It's successes like these that keep me going. I used to think that the more diet knowledge I had the better choices I would make but that has never been proven. Only by relaxing, trusting myself and being kind to myself has proven any results and those go beyond weightloss. Way to go!
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Old 06-27-2014, 09:18 AM   #192
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I'm still struggling but I'm trying to I with it. I've had a few late night snack attacks which are worrisome because I recognize that I'm not hungry when I eat. I'm tryin to ride it out.

I was thinking about something about some of the other types of dieters. So many claim that they don't have a "full" gauge but they all claim bast amounts of hunger (caused by carbs apparently). If you can't gauge fullness how can you accurately gauge hunger? Something about this concept doesn't make sense to me.

I have a plan for when I go on vacation. We'll be heading to Europe for a 6wk visit to my family. I will not restrict myself from the foods I missed and there will be no scale. I'll be on the beach for several hours a day and the heat always subdues my hunger a lot. I'm taking all my IE knowledge with me and hope that my mom doesn't drive me too crazy lol.

About exercise - when it becomes goal oriented like 'I will exercise 5 times a week' I did myself doing less. I take it one day at a time and engage in activities I want to enjoy. I have stopped wearing my fitbit and although its strange not knowing how many steps I've completed it how many miles I've walked I can honestly say it hasn't affected the amount I exercise, I'm still out there walking for god knows how long. I've seen nonnegative effects from this nuts a bummer though because my fitbit was a Xmas gift is asked for, I did enjoy it a lot.
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"Binging is a descent into a world where every restriction... is cut loose. At its core is a feeling of deprivation.. a feeling you can never get enough. Binges do not signify a lack of willpower or inability to care for yourself. On the contrary, binges are a urgent attempt to care for yourself when you feel uncared for. They are the voice of survival. Binges are the mark of the self that says, 'I am tired of feeling deprived, of being told I am wrong, that I am bad." - Geneen Roth
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Old 06-27-2014, 11:09 AM   #193
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Originally Posted by Wannabeskinny View Post
Stress is everywhere, no idea how to avoid it. The other day I ran into 2 ex boyfriends on the same day!!! One was obsessed and I had to get a restraining order on him... Awkward! The other was what I believed to be my soup mate who cheated on me and crushed my heart into a million little pieces. I know this is all long in the past but I immediately thought how terrible I look now compared to when I was with them. I spoke to neither of them but exchange glances enough to berate myself with conjuring up all the negative thoughts they must have thought about how I look. Who knows, maybe they thought "hey there's the one who got away, she looks amazing" but in my mind they were saying to themselves "dodged a bullet."

Then I went shopping for summer clothes. I tried on bathing suits. Anyone else have seriously longings for fried chicken after they try on a series of bathing suits or is that just me? And there is no bathing suit in the world that can cover up my most hated body part - my thighs. Huge, jiggly, full of cellulite, they are the name io my existence. There is not one pair of pants rightly made for my body. These thighs must be one of a kind, broke the mold with them. I'm feel body conscious and I have no idea why that makes me want to eat, it makes more sense not to.

Argh sorry I'm clouding everything up with all my negativity!
This is a safe place to vent, so please don't feel like you need to apologize!!

I actually have overcome the swimsuit issue years ago. I just want to have fun with my kids and a swimsuit is part of it. They don't care what I look like because I'm just mom. They want to have fun and that means me being in the pool. I used to then be sort of embarrassed to be around people I knew (other than family) in my suit. Then I got over that too because you know what, if you care what I look like in my suit, then I feel sorry for you and your lack of anything in important in your life - geez. No one should give a hoot about what I look like in my suit - so if they don't care then why in the H am I caring so much? I just want to have fun and live my life no matter what size or shape I am.

I also started Kosama this week and its so hot in there and I sweat like crazy. so I went and bought some sleeveless work out shirts. My friend who also goes says, "oh I can't wear those shirts, my arms are so flabby". Yep, so are mine but who gives a rip? I'm working out and I don't want to be hot or have my boobs falling out all over so this is what I'm wearing. If you can't handle it then too bad so sad for you - not me. When I showed up today in one, the main lady at the front desk looked at me - I could tell she looked at my bare arms (or maybe my farmers tan) but who cares? I am who I am and I'm not missing out because of my size anymore. I'm just so over it.

Your body has survived so much and you deserve to be happy and wear whatever you want to regardless of what others think... LIVE IN THE NOW!!!

About the ex's - I doubt they even noticed. We give men way too much credit. My husband has never cared and my weight with him has been as low as 190 and up to 300. Other men I've dated have always marveled at the fact that I see myself this way and I was shocked that they didn't. So again, we give them too much credit. YOU should be thinking "dodged a bullet" with both of those yahoos because you ROCK IT SISTER!
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Old 06-27-2014, 11:09 AM   #194
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@Pattygirl: This is what it is all about - GREAT WIN!!! WE ARE THE AFTER PICTURE!

@Seana: Read some Geenen Roth - an earlier posts gives some reading tips that are super useful. Continually ask yourself if you are hungry or not and do not eat unless you are. If you aren't and it's been 20 minutes then go ahead and eat. You probably are experiencing mouth hunger. The Intuitive Eating book is also helpful about this. I highly recommend it.

Has anyone looked into the "Am I hungry?" website, classes, coaches, etc...??? I just found it and need to look into it. Just thought I'd put it out there to see...

Last edited by jensassy : 06-27-2014 at 11:15 AM.
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Old 06-27-2014, 11:27 AM   #195
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@Wannabe That sounds like a fun time. I'm super jealous of your European vacation.

@Seana I second the Geneen Roth advice from Jen- that woman is really cool and has taught me loads about emotional eating.

I'm finding that it's really true that you eat less of foods that satisfy you. I had been restricting the past few weeks (eating less carbs, more whole foods) but I find I eat much less when I eat the things I really want, even if they are "fattening". Last night I had ravioli with sausage and red cream sauce with kale. Talk about fattening, right? But I ate less and felt less full than if I'd had beef and vegetables. I'm also trying not to plan any meals ahead of time- just keep the house stocked with stuff and let me decide what I'm in the mood for when I get home. So yeah it's been an okay week.
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