I think if I could squint, I could see my house --- . As for the Chinese Buffet, if you went 20 min away from downtown on Princess Street, you would be about 5 minutes away from my house!!!! Seriously!!!
Yeah, I can relate to the "all the way up THERE" comments, as I have heard them from my US friends - "my GOSH you all sure are North"!!! I was even asked by one person, while on a cruise, if "[you]-all have movies up there??? AND uniVERSITIES??? Wow...". YIKES!
I love NY state, and NYC!!
Take care! Maybe I'll see you around.
p.s. you MUST have been to at least ONE Tim Horton's while you were in town!
My brother and I are very close and he is married with children. When I go to visit, I tend to just walk in the door (makes me wanna rethink that!) No but really, My sister (in law) would tell me if she didnt like it. What is not good about this is the fact that she looks at you as less than family. I refer to my sister in law as my sister and nothing less. My nephews mean as much to me as my own daughter and I am definetly Auntie in their house.
I would put one of those chain locks on the inside so she couldnt just barge in. She should NOT have a key to your house. The only time I have a key to my brohers house is when I have the boys.Thats the only time I need one. As for just walking in, well, they know when Im coming.
Thanks for the advice, ev! I really hesitate to talk to her, because although she is really, really nice, she can be really, really nasty and is extremely sarcastic about people behind their backs. I see it all the time, where she will criticize other family members (in-laws as well as siblings) in the most nasty, rude terms. I'm actually afraid of her, because I know that if I say ANYTHING that is slightly south of what she wants to hear, I will be discussed and dissed within his family (they often do this on three-way conference calls). I've found this quite inappropriate at times (i.e. at funerals - seriously) and have noticed that whenever I try to tell her something important, she interrupts with a sarcastic remark that focuses attention back to her. My SIL claims that she is using her sarcasm as a "tool" to deal with life - I privately consider this to be poor listening skills and insecurity to make sure that the spotlight is always on her. She also will hijack conversations by starting sarcastic "asides" when someone else is speaking and continuing a side conversation with that person. Tough when there are only 3 of you in the room...SO, I am completely reluctant to talk to her about his, as no good will ever come of it. Time to work on hubby!!!!
Oh heck, i was thinking how hard it would be for me to talk to her about it, but if she was like this, I would totally tell her in no uncertain terms that she comes over too freakin much, change the locks and the garage code. I think if it meant i was more comfortable in MY OWN HOME, i wouldnt care what she said about me.
Yeah, I can relate to the "all the way up THERE" comments, as I have heard them from my US friends - "my GOSH you all sure are North"!!! I was even asked by one person, while on a cruise, if "[you]-all have movies up there??? AND uniVERSITIES??? Wow...".
Oh gosh, I live in rural (and i DO mean rural) Missouri, and i have actually heard of people who are surprised to find out that we all have electricity, running water, television and even SHOES! (shoes for god's sake!) Yes, and considering their ignorance of the people in their own country, most of us are probably 20 times more intelligent than them as well. Jeez, people are so stupid sometimes.
People can be really, really dense sometimes! Glad to hear about your shoes and running water !!!! You are so right in that I am in a tough situation - the totally direct part of me wants to be really, really assertive, and I would be if this was my sister or my friend. But, because my hubby is just so VERY happy to see her when she comes over, and because he tells me EVERY DAY that it is JUST SO GREAT to see her all the time, I am trying to manage a workable way that doesn't rain on my hubby's parade, but gives me satisfaction too!!! I don't envy me...
This wont help you with the overall problem, but when she comes over and your hubby is over, let HIM do the entertaining. You eat breakfast in bed, watch tv, take a long bath, etc.
People will only treat you as badly as you let them treat you. I think you have to be assertive and talk to her. Trying to force your husband to communicate for you is only putting him in an uncomfortable situation.
I would put deadbolts on all the doors as someone else suggested. Then I would invite the SIL over for coffee and just tell her that you love her, are so glad she is so close now, enjoy spending time with her and want to not offend her by getting caught nekkid in the living room so would she please just call before coming over.
Then I would spend every afternoon at her house in her pool.
Freiamaya: My breakfast of choice in Canada is a Boston Creme from Tim Hortons With a large coffee. Did I mention what happens in Canada stays in Canada? That includes calories! I've never been to NYC, by the way...I haven't been much further than Albany. My mom always said I'd be mugged if I went there...
Albany is actually a pretty safe place - I don't think you'd get mugged there! ha ha, little joke -- my husband feels the same way about NYC, but I can ATTEST to the fact that NYC is one of the greatest cities in the world (Hey, don't forget about London, Paris, Florence...sigh...) and I felt very safe while I was there.
Here in Kingston, my husband and I worship on pretty much a daily basis at the Temple of Tim's, as we call it here as it seems to be almost a RELIGION (no religious offense meant, anyone!).
My brother noticed that cities in Canada can be described as follows:
Vancouver has a Starbuck's on every corner
Calgary has a video rental shop on every corner
Edmonton has a mini-mall on every corner
Winnipeg has a mosquito on every corner
Ottawa has a chip truck on every corner (and a politician, too!)
Montreal has a depanneur (late-hour convenience store) on every corner
Charlottetown, PEI, has a potato on every corner (ha ha, little joke there!)
Halifax has a University on every corner, and
Kingston has a Tim Horton's on every corner.
I can attest to the truthfulness of the last one.
I think I've picked up the calories you left behind here on your last visit! You can come get them off my butt anytime you like!!!
Freiamaya: That's funny....where I grew up in Greece (suburb of Rochester), we always said there was a bowling alley on every corner. I think they're dwindling, though and being replaced by Dominoes (pizza), dance studios and car washes. I DO love Kingston, though. Although, I have to admit, the last time we were there was a Sunday night and, is it just me or is that when the weirdos come out? One of our other favorite haunts is Cooks...um..not sure how to categorize it...but it's the place that sells chocolate covered ants. And great cheese! Speaking of haunts....have you ever been on the haunted walk? I've always wanted to try it. Have you ever been to Upper Canada Village? We go there ever couple of years and went there on a field trip with the kids at school. What a fun trip!! Another trip they took was to Ottawa in 5th grade to see Parliament and all that. They loved that trip.
Cookes Fine Foods has been in business since the mid 1800's, and it is an INSTITUTION here! My hubby and I get our fresh roasted coffee from there, but we pass on the chocolate ants. So glad that you enjoy our lovely province - next time, try a Thousand Island cruise from Gananoque (a 3 HOUR CRUISE - but not on the mighty Minnow from Gilligan's Island). Love the break in the heat here!
Techwife, you really must visit NYC. And when you do, go see a Broadway play. I grew up in Brooklyn and worked in the city many years. I lived in NJ and commuted by bus - wore stockings, socks and sneakers and walked from the bus terminal to my office.
My son went to Morrisville State College - that's as far north as I have been in NYS.
Phantastica, I will make SURE my hubby sends out our garage passcode ASAP so that EVERYONE on the forum can pop by whenever they want!!!! I'll make sure I cook for 700 EVERY DAY, and we'll all have a great time!!! Or, better yet, my sister-in-law has a swimming pool -- maybe we could all meet there for breakfast unannounced...BRING YOUR SUITS!!!
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAA
Let's show up uninvited to HER PLACE just to give her a taste of her own medicine
freiamaya, just caught this thread and although I find the ideas hilarious. I sympathize greatly. my mother has a key to my house and although at the time I gave it to her it was for safety ( long story) now 2 years later she still pops in and when she does call in advance and I don't answer she comes over immediately thinking something is wrong. heehee she might think better about it in the future.
Good luck and I know you will find an answer to this. I may live in the country and we tend to pop over to others places but we do call, knock and check in advance. I finally did warn her that if she didn't start calling and knocking that i would take her key privelage away. That seemed to work for quite awhile.
Oh and from those in NY no we do not trade with the indians anymore a great question I would get when I visited that pretty state. too funny though as they were dead serious.
So good luck and I hope it works out for you in a bit.
Anna
Thanks, Flawless. Those of us in Canada can relate to your Northern State questions, and I have had to provide a few answers to odd questions, like:
--BEFORE YOU READ, KEEP IN MIND THAT THESE ARE ANSWERS TO QUESTIONS I HAVE HEARD FROM MY FRIENDS FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD, INCLUDING ITALY, ENGLAND, SOUTH AMERICA, JAPAN, AND YES, THE US. BUT THIS IS NOT TO BE CONSTRUED AS BASHING ANY NATION, IT IS SIMPLY HUMOROUS!!!--
1. No, you DON'T need a winter coat when you come to visit. It is JULY. It is WARM. There is NO SNOW here in JULY.
2. No, I DON'T know your cousin's friend Bob, from Toronto. There are 4.5 million people in Toronto. I live in Kingston. I don't know your Bob.
3. No, you CAN'T drive from Edmonton to Vancouver for dinner. Unless you want to stay in Vancouver. At least overnight.
4. No, I WON'T pick you up at the airport in Edmonton. I live near Toronto. Far away. Really, really far. AWAY.
5. No, I DON'T have an electric car. The plug out the engine is for the block heater. Because it gets cold here. In WINTER, not July.
6. No, there are no whales in Lake Ontario. Lake Ontario is FRESH-WATER. Whales live in the OCEAN. and NO, they don't swim up the St. Lawrence to visit.
And finally, a quote from Britney Spears:
"I have always wanted to travel across seas, like to Canada and stuff. "
Seriously!
. As for the Chinese Buffet, if you went 20 min away from downtown on Princess Street, you would be about 5 minutes away from my house!!!! Seriously!!!
Yes, and considering their ignorance of the people in their own country, most of us are probably 20 times more intelligent than them as well. Jeez, people are so stupid sometimes.
!!!! You are so right in that I am in a tough situation - the totally direct part of me wants to be really, really assertive, and I would be if this was my sister or my friend. But, because my hubby is just so VERY happy to see her when she comes over, and because he tells me EVERY DAY that it is JUST SO GREAT to see her all the time, I am trying to manage a workable way that doesn't rain on my hubby's parade, but gives me satisfaction too!!! I don't envy me...
With a large coffee. Did I mention what happens in Canada stays in Canada? That includes calories!
One of our other favorite haunts is Cooks...um..not sure how to categorize it...but it's the place that sells chocolate covered ants. And great cheese! Speaking of haunts....have you ever been on the haunted walk? I've always wanted to try it. Have you ever been to Upper Canada Village? We go there ever couple of years and went there on a field trip with the kids at school. What a fun trip!! Another trip they took was to Ottawa in 5th grade to see Parliament and all that. They loved that trip.
