I was a mother of the bride in October. I, too, looked on line and everything was either very matronly or WAY too young! Nothing in the middle, like me at age 52. I finally broke down and went to the mall and found the perfect dress at Dillard's. I don't know if you have a Dillard's where you are. What I did find also, and you probably will too, is that there is NO way I could have ordered a dress on line and had it fit unless I ordered about four or five sizes. I tried on everything from a 10 (which fit) to a 16 (which also fit). I normally wear a 12 in regular clothes and haven't found quite the size differences that there are in more formal clothes. So if you order on line, give yourself lots of time!
Congratulations by the way!