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Old 04-29-2014, 01:13 PM   #1
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If someone posts pics of themself regularly on facebook with hardly any clothes on, do you think deep down this is a sign of insecurity?

I (sort of) know someone who does this. She posts tons of pics of her face, and changes her profile pic several times a week. But, she also posts a lot of pics of herself in her underwear. Sometimes she's in her bra and panties. Sometimes just panties, with one hand over her boobs and the other hand holding her phone. Her face is never shown in these pics. And she always adds captions like, "I love being me, I'm so awesome looking." or "If all women learned to love their bodies the world would be a better place." And she also says stuff like, "This is so brave of me to post this." And then a ton of people comment, saying things like, "Yes, you're so brave, you're so beautiful" etc.

She talks a lot about loving her body... but she has (what society has decided anyway) is a perfect body. She's petite, toned and has big boobs. So it's easy for someone who looks like that to love their body. If a 400 lb women did this everyone would think it was gross and think she was crazy for loving her body.

But, as I see these pics, the part of me who is really into psychology starts to wonder if deep down she is, in fact, really insecure. Does she really love her body or is she just seeking validation from others? What do you all think, discuss!

Note: I am not asking for advice. This doesn't even bother me really. I am just more interested in the psychology of it.
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Old 04-29-2014, 01:18 PM   #2
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facebook is a pretty wide audience for that sort of thing.

i know lots of people who invest a huge amount of time and thought into weight training and dieting to shape their bodies how they want, and they are proud and show it off at a website dedicated to that sort of thing. i see it as a source of pride in a hobby, not as a sign of insecurity.

of course, it all depends on how you do it.
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Old 04-29-2014, 01:21 PM   #3
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It's an interesting topic, and not one, I think, that has any one answer that's applicable to all. I don't think, though, that we can make a sweeping statement that 'of course she loves her body because it's perfect'. I, for one, have never met any woman who is satisfied with the way she looks (face or body), no matter how great she may look to others. We are our own worst critics, and I've seen gorgeous, fit, toned women complain about what they see as their flaws, whether it's stubby fingers, a microscopic bit of neck fat, breasts that are too big/too small according to them, etc.

I'm no expert on psychology, but from what you said about that girl, my most educated guess would be that yes, she is insecure, but at the same time she knows that others see her as attractive so she's seeking validation from them.

Of course she could just really love her body and want to show it off. I really don't know
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Old 04-29-2014, 01:25 PM   #4
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My first instinct would be that she's seeking validation, for sure.

My second instinct would be to block her posts! I don't need to see that on Facebook from my friends! That's what Tumblr is for, haha.
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Old 04-29-2014, 01:29 PM   #5
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It seems to me that the more you have to loudly proclaim or "prove" that you have something, the more you don't. Doesn't matter if that something is intelligence, success, an important job, good self-esteem, or whatever. You know what I mean; it's not that no one can feel good about themselves or have a good life, just that the more a person insistently needs the world to "know" or validate that they have X, the more I doubt they really have that much X. Definitely comes from insecurity.
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Old 04-29-2014, 01:37 PM   #6
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If I were to be fit and toned I would flaunt it too Not to seek validation, but to tell the world I did it! -- If someone puts that much work into their perfect body, they deserve the glory. Good for them!!

You sure you are not a bit jealous? I would be!
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Old 04-29-2014, 01:51 PM   #7
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I guess I'm just a bit of a prude and would never post a half naked picture of myself for all my friends and family to see. So maybe my opinion of this situation is a little jaded. A bathing suit picture from a trip to the beach is one thing, but all the time underwear selfies? Nah.
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Old 04-29-2014, 01:54 PM   #8
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I know someone like this. In her case, it is probably about insecurity.

Also, I am horrified that someone would think it's okay to post pics of themselves in just their undies on a regular basis. I don't care how darn good I looked, I wouldn't put pictures of me in my drawers posing seductively on the internet! AHHHH- the thought of it makes me severely uncomfortable. But then again, I am weird, and don't like my picture on the internet anyway. Different strokes, eh?
Maybe that's why I never posted any goal pics the five hundred times I lost weight!

I do, however, think that from a psychological perspective, an organism will repeat an action that gives a reinforcing result. So, maybe it's a combination of things: she actually does like her body, but then she really enjoys the validation of others confirming her own suspicions as well.

The sad thing is, I have seen people that clung so hard to their one "thing", and as it fades, with age or time or whatever, that it is a bad letdown if you don't love more than just that one thing. Hopefully her life is fuller than just her own appreciation of her physical beauty, because there is more to her than just that, and the "youthful beauty" will eventually fade.
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Old 04-29-2014, 01:56 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sum38 View Post
If I were to be fit and toned I would flaunt it too Not to seek validation, but to tell the world I did it! -- If someone puts that much work into their perfect body, they deserve the glory. Good for them!!

You sure you are not a bit jealous? I would be!
This... sigh. How did I not see that coming? I work out 5 times a week, have lost tons of weight, and am also proud of my body. I DON'T need to show it off all the time to feel good aboit myself. I have a man who loves me the way I am and friends who are proud of me for sticking with it like I have. And my health has improved dramatically.

I said in my post thay the pics she posts dont even bother me. I thoight on a WEIGHT LOSS forum this would be a good topic to post aboit. But of course someone has to accuse me of being jealous and make me feel bad for posting aboit it. Wow... ( now watch, this response will be used against me as more evidence of my supposed jealousy.)

Thanks to everyone else who replied with your opinions. To people who think I am jealous. That is total b.s..
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Old 04-29-2014, 01:58 PM   #10
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Just wondered...not accusing. There is a difference, but based on your response, I think I was right.
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Old 04-29-2014, 02:13 PM   #11
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Insecurity like whoa. I have a "friend" who does the same thing all over fb and it's just sad. Nobody ever really likes her posts either, even though she's lost a bit of weight to go from chubby to thin. She also mentions how hungry she is pretty often (because she starves herself to stay small).

I have seen more of her body than my own, and this is not a teen, it's a 30 year old woman!
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Old 04-29-2014, 02:14 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DazeGypsy View Post
This... sigh. How did I not see that coming? I work out 5 times a week, have lost tons of weight, and am also proud of my body. I DON'T need to show it off all the time to feel good aboit myself. I have a man who loves me the way I am and friends who are proud of me for sticking with it like I have. And my health has improved dramatically.

I said in my post thay the pics she posts dont even bother me. I thoight on a WEIGHT LOSS forum this would be a good topic to post aboit. But of course someone has to accuse me of being jealous and make me feel bad for posting aboit it. Wow... ( now watch, this response will be used against me as more evidence of my supposed jealousy.)

Thanks to everyone else who replied with your opinions. To people who think I am jealous. That is total b.s..
^this, totally.

This selfie business (meaning posting multiple times a day, pictures of yourself) is evidence of a narcissistic society. Just my not so humble opinion (and no i'm not jealous because i've never seen the girl )
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Old 04-29-2014, 02:23 PM   #13
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ReillyJ Nice thing about FB, if you don't like somebody and their posts, there is a remove friend button.

I find it distasteful to be publicly shaming someone. If posting pictures of herself makes her happy, think OP should let her be. But airing out on a public forum like this is un-excusable and bad taste.
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Old 04-29-2014, 02:40 PM   #14
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Quote:
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ReillyJ Nice thing about FB, if you don't like somebody and their posts, there is a remove friend button.

I find it distasteful to be publicly shaming someone. If posting pictures of herself makes her happy, think OP should let her be. But airing out on a public forum like this is un-excusable and bad taste.
I do not understand where you're coming from here. It would be one thing if DazeGypsy posted this on her Facebook page, but as far as I can tell there's no connection between her 3FC account and Facebook so how is that in bad taste? It's not like the women she is talking about will come across it and as she said, she was starting a discussion.
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Old 04-29-2014, 02:44 PM   #15
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I think taking poorly behind someone's back is bad taste.

I would hate if I was made into a topic on a forum. It would hurt my feelings.
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