Hi everyone,
I'm sorry it's so long, but I really need help.
A year ago I transferred into a new college far from home, and I luckily found a friend my first semester. She is polite/ kind to EVERYONE. We got way closer second semester when two of her closest friends went away for the semester, and we had two classes together. We hung out a lot that year, and I considered her a good friend. Anyway, summer happened and I came back to school. I still thought she was a friend and someone I could trust in, and I treated her like that for a while. I noticed that she doesn't really speak to me unless she had to anymore, and when she did it was forced. She didn't even tell me about her new boyfriend! Every time we hung out she talks to everyone else and hardly speaks to me. I literally feel as if she doesn't want to be around me anymore.
When I noticed it I decided that I would just ignore her back, but that just made me feel crummy; so I talked to her about the fact that we don't talk anymore, and she denied it (we just came out of a meeting when I told her this and she said "you were sitting on the other side of the table from me", yet she spoke to the girl sitting right next to me...).She gave one of our mutual friends a jacket I left in her room when we were all hanging out, and my friend said "yea it was weird it was like she didn't want it in her room. It was so weird." It was weird especially since I left a dress in her room for about a month last semester and she didn't say anything. Also, she used to send out text messages with quotes daily, and I hadn't gotten them for about a week and she said she was reevaluating some stuff, and "forgot" to add me to the new list. I've cried over this, and I don't know why she's doing it. I honestly think it's a mixture of her not having all of her friends here last semester, me not being as physically attractive as her other friends, and also her using me to help her study and pass the classes we were in together.
I don't want to keep asking why, because I fell as if I am begging her to be my friend. I can't do this. I also feel like ignoring her to hurt her like she hurt me, but I realize that does not solve anything, and in the end I'm hurting the whole way through too.
I guess I really just want some advice about how to get over rejection. Whenever something like this happens to me, I just get really depressed/anxious. I know that college will be over for me soon, and that I have lots of other friends, but I don't want to keep feeling rejected whenever I am forced to hang out with her. I don't want to completely be mean and ignore her either. How do I send the message that I understand that the friendship is over, and that I don't want her to force it anymore without completely ignoring her or coming off as mean? I'm hesitant to call her a "witch", because she is a polite person, maybe she doesn't feel close to me anymore. Things happen I guess.... Should I still be polite to her and say "hi" without trying to go into conversation with her? What about when we're in a group, should I ignore her? Because I don't want to try and interact with someone who doesn't want to be with me? How do I stop feeling like this?
Thank you everyone. I really appreciate it.