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Would you forgive this "friend"

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Old 02-21-2013, 09:47 PM   #16
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I might have said sure, give her another chance, but not with the lying to your husband and saying you were out with other men. That just puts it completely beyond forgivable.
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Old 02-21-2013, 10:46 PM   #17
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No way,run like the wind from this person rosey
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Old 02-21-2013, 11:00 PM   #18
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Depends on the strength and depth of the friendship.

I'm pretty imperfect myself so my true friends forgive me sometimes and I do the same for them.
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Old 02-21-2013, 11:25 PM   #19
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I agree - calling your husband and telling him you were out with men was crossing the line. I *may* have forgiven calling your husband if she didn't exaggerate it. Also, her leaving early without you - not safe and not appropriate.

That said, there are two sides to every story and her behavior seems so irrational (I presume you liked this woman before the trip and she doesn't have a history of this type of behavior) that I can't help but wonder - what is her side of the story? And is there a miscommunication you weren't aware of? Is it possible she is on some other message board going "you'll never guess what my friend did to me in new orleans ... I had to leave early" ... (okay probably not on a message board but you get my point - is this what she is thinking?). I don't know if I think you should just ditch her immediately - and think you should at least try to talk with her about what happened and how it mde you feel.
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Old 02-22-2013, 12:23 AM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mandypandy2246 View Post
I agree - calling your husband and telling him you were out with men was crossing the line. I *may* have forgiven calling your husband if she didn't exaggerate it. Also, her leaving early without you - not safe and not appropriate.

That said, there are two sides to every story and her behavior seems so irrational (I presume you liked this woman before the trip and she doesn't have a history of this type of behavior) that I can't help but wonder - what is her side of the story? And is there a miscommunication you weren't aware of? Is it possible she is on some other message board going "you'll never guess what my friend did to me in new orleans ... I had to leave early" ... (okay probably not on a message board but you get my point - is this what she is thinking?). I don't know if I think you should just ditch her immediately - and think you should at least try to talk with her about what happened and how it mde you feel.
Yeah, she's worried for your "safety" yet LEAVES YOU ALONE in the US and flies back home without you??? How hypocritical is that?

Honestly, she sounds really weird to me. As above, her behavior is so weird and insane that I feel like we're all missing something here. Nobody rational acts like that unless they are:
1. Crazy
2. Has a good reason you are unaware of.

Judging from your story, I highly doubt there is a good reason you are missing. Therefore, she is crazy.
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Old 02-22-2013, 12:27 AM   #21
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Yeah, she's worried for your "safety" yet LEAVES YOU ALONE in the US and flies back home without you??? How hypocritical is that?

Honestly, she sounds really weird to me. As above, her behavior is so weird and insane that I feel like we're all missing something here. Nobody rational acts like that unless they are:
1. Crazy
2. Has a good reason you are unaware of.

Judging from your story, I highly doubt there is a good reason you are missing. Therefore, she is crazy.
Honestly, as I said, most people do not talk to her because she is crazy. In 2 years, she has lost her 2 closest friends because they got fed up with her. My husband (prior to this) hated even being in the same room as her because he couldn't stand her. I admit, I could have gone back to the hotel room, but I could not deal with being talked to like a child and her bossy behavior. I wanted to enjoy the rest of the trip and deal with the problems later, but she wouldn't listen.

She was honestly just mad because I did not come back to the hotel room. That was the only issue on the trip and because I did not do what she wanted, she leaves me in another country. There was no major fight, no harsh words... nothing. Just me not coming back when she wanted and her taking off.
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Old 02-22-2013, 12:31 AM   #22
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But you deserve a real friend. I can understand feeling lonely and missing a friendship, but that is not a healthy friendship. I'm not saying ditch her forever - but you simply cannot trust and would need to find better alternatives in real friendship.
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Old 02-22-2013, 12:36 AM   #23
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Thanks for all of your responses guys! I do appreciate it. Its nice to have somewhere to vent.
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Old 02-22-2013, 12:44 AM   #24
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But you deserve a real friend. I can understand feeling lonely and missing a friendship, but that is not a healthy friendship. I'm not saying ditch her forever - but you simply cannot trust and would need to find better alternatives in real friendship.
I totally agree. You admit she's crazy, it's not healthy to stay in an unhealthy relationship like that - with a friend or boyfriend or husband, etc. Know what I mean?

I'm not judging, I know it's really hard to break free from unhealthy things. But berryblondeboys is right. You deserve a real friend. I would NEVER EVER EVER EVER do that to one of my friends. Ever!!
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