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11-20-2012, 03:50 PM
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#1
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Senior Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: NYC
Posts: 620
S/C/G: 145 / 102 / ?
Height: 5'
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Counting other peoples' calories
I really hate it when people go on a diet and then try to force it on everyone else. At the same time, I find myself trying not to do others a disservice.
My neighbor got a last-minute call for a job, and asked me to pick up a snack for her. I found myself angsting at the deli over something with quick energy, but not too many calories. (I went with a 90 calorie Blueberry Special K bar. ;-)
I made my husband a meatloaf to eat while I was away this week--and was really annoyed that he ate 7/8ths of it before the weekend was over. I had to bite my tongue not to point out that at 375 calories a slice, it's a meal, not a snack--and he could have eaten an entire Costco-size box of Fiber One brownies for the same amount of calories.
He got an advent calendar for the little girl across the street, and I was trying to convince him to fill it with individual gummy Life Savers, and not chocolate, because she's a little person, and you never know how many calories a parent wants to let their kid eat in candy--for 25 days straight.
I definitely don't want to be THAT person. At the same time, I'm trying to find the line between being considerate of others, and being a busy-body!
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11-20-2012, 04:21 PM
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#2
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Fear does not = fate
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: WA
Posts: 514
S/C/G: 295/140/nogoal :)
Height: 5'2"
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I am that person. I count my husband's calories now, but I'm subtle about it. "Are you sure you wouldn't rather have -all- this to snack on vs that?" "You can have more of this for dinner? You sure?"
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11-20-2012, 04:21 PM
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#3
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Senior Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: British Columbia, Canada
Posts: 248
S/C/G: 350/296/125
Height: 177cm
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I know what you mean! It's so tough especially when these are the people in your life that you love and want the best for them. I struggle with that too. I bite my tongue for the most part but when it's something big and I can't, I make sure to preface it with "I love you and care about your health..." and I try to bring it up casually. Make sure your tone isn't bossy and harsh but soft and submissive. I find people are way more receptive to the words you have to say if you aren't loud about it. People communicate with more than just words, tone and body language say a lot!!
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11-20-2012, 04:26 PM
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#4
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Junior Member
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 5
S/C/G: 275/137/127
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Hi , I understand and have been there myself. I just started paying attention to my plate. other adults are responsible for their own health
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11-20-2012, 04:43 PM
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#5
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Back with a story
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Midwest
Posts: 3,754
S/C/G: 281 / 254 / 160
Height: 5'3" - I got taller!
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Oh no, I do NOT go there. First off, what looks like a lot of food to me is different for my active, bigger hubby, who fasts most of the day. He eats 2000+ calories of food in the evening, much of it junkier than my preference, but unlike me he burns more and also doesn't graze all day! He's an adult, and an intelligent one without significant weight management problems, at that. It isn't my business to police him, even if I want to. I just trust his internal fullness cues and ignore the rest.
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11-20-2012, 04:57 PM
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#6
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Starting over sucks.
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Saskatchewan
Posts: 2,245
S/C/G: 485/445/250
Height: 6'1
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I don't do it to anyone but my bf, and it's because he ASKED me to. He has horrible skin problems that led to the naturopath putting him on the paleo diet, and he has asked repeatedly for me to cook so that he can lose weight before he's a groomsman for his sister. He's currently driving me up the wall because he doesn't get that while salmon and asparagus is a healthy meal, the calories add up when you have four platefuls (and he wonders why we spend so much on groceries...)
I try to be patient because I know a major stumbling block is that his heartburn meds blunt his "full" response, and I always feed him a huge salad before every meal. I don't want to be a nitpicker, but good lord, don't ask me for help if you don't want it
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11-20-2012, 05:00 PM
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#7
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Fat to Fab and Fit
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 6,122
S/C/G: 190/151.2/122
Height: 5'3"
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I count my husband's calories out of jealousy He can pack in 3500 per day and not gain any weight. Anything less, he dropps pounds
Last edited by Sum38; 11-20-2012 at 05:00 PM.
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11-20-2012, 05:00 PM
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#8
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Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 91
S/C/G: 222/Ticker/140
Height: 5'4"
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I definitely don't get involved in what other people are eating. I would hate it if someone did that to me. Fortunately for me, my husband (who is the only other person in my house) decided to limit his intake before I did, and he doesn't eat any junk and doesn't binge on calorie dense foods so I never even have to consider saying anything to him. My youngest daughter has had an eating disorder since she was in college (too thin), and I always seemed to say the wrong things to her. She had no qualms about putting me in my place, so I've been trained well. Fortunately she never got so thin as to be in danger and she has been getting appropriate help. So making remarks on what they are eating isa no-no for the thin as well as the overweight.
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11-20-2012, 05:01 PM
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#9
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Stephanie
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Phoenix, AZ
Posts: 3,221
S/C/G: 236/135-140/More Fit
Height: 5'6"
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I don't let myself go there. I definitely would not want someone doing that to me, so even if the though crosses my mind I try to banish it quickly. I have enough to worry about with myself, I don't need the distraction of other people's food too!
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11-20-2012, 07:44 PM
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#10
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Vancouver, Canada
Posts: 506
S/C/G: 183/166/135
Height: 5'6"
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Today I was waiting for something from Tim Horton's and a lady beside me ordered. She ordered a jalapeno and cheese bagel and I had this crazy reaction where I almost burst out yelling "do you know how many POINTS the bagels are here!!" LOL!!! (by points I mean Weight Watchers points).
Of course I would never say anything to anyone though!!
But yeah, I was kind of hyperventilating when a coworker asked me to pick them up a LARGE chocolate shake and large fries (and something else I can't remember). I was kind of in awe because I've never had a large shake in my entire life!
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11-20-2012, 08:08 PM
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#11
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Heading Downtown...
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: New York
Posts: 1,394
S/C/G: 225/165/165
Height: 5'8"
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I have my hands full keeping track and counting my own calories and I'm nowhere near perfect at it... So I just keep it to myself, otherwise it just seems to come off as self-righteous... which never goes over well in my house...
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11-20-2012, 08:39 PM
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#12
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Staying the Same
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Troy, NY
Posts: 6,448
S/C/G: 160+/116-120/maintainer
Height: 5'5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BreathingSpace
I've never had a large shake in my entire life!
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Whaaaaat?!?!?!!
(Nah it's the same as a small shake except you eventually stop actually tasting it because the sugar numbs your mouth)
In response to the OP, I definitely have noticed other people's calories but I think I would be hypocritical for commenting on it, since everyone I know has watched me inhale a dozen chicken wings to go with several beers.
I notice people's MACROS more than calories. Like "why are you eating beans on rice on sweet potatoes and no protein?"
Last edited by krampus; 11-20-2012 at 08:39 PM.
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11-20-2012, 08:39 PM
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#13
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Fear does not = fate
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: WA
Posts: 514
S/C/G: 295/140/nogoal :)
Height: 5'2"
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My husband has asked me to help him eat better/healthier/watch portion size. So I'm not doing it to be mean! I promise!
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11-20-2012, 08:56 PM
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#14
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Senior Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Floriduh
Posts: 950
S/C/G: 247/see ticker/140
Height: 5'4
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If a coworker is eating something that looks good to me and I begin to crave
I ask to scan their food out of curiousity and to stump my own craving, I normally don't tell them what the calorie count is unless they ask
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11-20-2012, 10:45 PM
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#15
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Lifelong Alaskan!
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Juneau, Alaska
Posts: 2,669
S/C/G: 230/180/150
Height: 5'5"
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i dont count their calories but im definitely more conscious of their health vs junk choices...like i notice when a coworker brings mcdonalds and an energy drink for the afternoon vs my peppers and salad in the fridge lol....i dont look down on that really, i just think "ew that stuff tastes nasty and would make me feel like sh*t all day if i ate that at work ugh" lol
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