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Old 05-05-2012, 01:50 AM   #1
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Not sure if this is in the correct place. So sorry if it's not.

Ugh. So I'm on an online dating site because I have a hard time meeting people. Anyway I had thought I met the perfect guy today. Not saying perfect to get married just to talk you know.. (we JUST met today) we have a lot in common and it was going well.. UNTIL

I told him I would feel more comfortable meeting him with someone else there. Like my friend. I even suggested that we could go on a double date. (Is this so bad of me. Did I break some online dating rule that says I HAVE to meet his guy by myself) I was brought up to be cautious.. Not to go around meeting guys on the internet (YOU NEVER KNOW). He said some pretty harsh things to me and i'm feeling pretty low right now.

I've always had a hard time dating because of my weight.. This just proves to me that I'm going to be alone forever..(not really im just in a shitty mood and my period is not far off I get WAY emotional around this time.)

Sorry for the rant.. Seems like that's all I do on this forum.
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Old 05-05-2012, 01:54 AM   #2
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my best friend started dating again, and she tried a few online dating sites (she met a GREAT guy, and they are doing very very well) but most guys on these sites were more interested in a piece of a** then actually dating. she had a lot of experiences like this. dont be discouraged, there are really great guys out there you just gotta keep looking.
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Old 05-05-2012, 01:58 AM   #3
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Yeah I know.. My cousin met and married her husband from an on line dating site. (I dont know them that well) but when I went to the wedding he seemed like a great guy and I'm sure she would not of married him if he wasn't..
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Old 05-05-2012, 02:04 AM   #4
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im really glad i never actually dated. my hubby is only the 2nd guy i dated and we are very happy, but i think online dating is a really cool way to explore your options. just dont get discouraged when jerks like that get mad about stupid things like that. you just gotta remember that if they are that rude before you even met, they probably wouldnt have been a good person to date.

also, it seems like the free dating websites like plenty of fish and stuff are pretty full of jerks like that. i havent heard of any complaints from the sites you have to pay to use (it sucks to pay, but if it means the guys actually want a relationship, hey, why not)

good luck, and be patient, good guys are few and far between. you will meet the right guy in time
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Old 05-05-2012, 02:45 AM   #5
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I would not be upset over this. He probably just wanted some a** like the above poster said, or even worse. You never know. When you stood your ground and said you'd only meet him with someone else there he knew he wouldn't be able to do whatever he had in his head. Be very careful and never agree to meet alone. I know it sucks and you feel awful bit remember there's many more fish in the sea. <3 hugs.
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Old 05-05-2012, 03:47 AM   #6
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You did the smart thing and made the right decision. A quality guy would have absolutely agreed and understood! An important thing you need to understand about online dating is that you have to sort through a LOT of losers before you meet a quality guy. Do not rush!!!! Continue to be smart and careful. And most of all, patient!
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Old 05-05-2012, 03:55 AM   #7
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I met two out of the three serious boyfriends online... one of which become my husband. I am a huge online dating fan. However, this guy should NOT have flipped. I think it is perfectly okay to meet someone alone (in a public place like a restaurant), but he should have at least been calm and understanding. Sure its not a "real" date, but if he was a nice guy, he would have wanted to go anyways so he could get to meet you.

He's a jerk. It's a good thing you found this out early on!
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Old 05-05-2012, 05:44 AM   #8
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I agree with what was said above! You did exactly what you felt you should and if he can't respect that, then that's his loss.

Both guy I have really ever dated was through an online dating website. The first one didn't go so well, however the second one is my current boyfriend of two+ years and I couldn't be happier.

The main thing that I always did was I spent time messaging back and forth with quite a few different people. Not only did that give me a chance to see qualities in guys that I did not enjoy, it was a major boost in confidence and a great way to get to know a lot of amazing people (all of which I would probably have never spoken with otherwise because we both were just too shy).

I'm sorry that he didn't handle the situation they way he should have. Always be smart and do what you feel is right. I know I'm lame, but I truly believe everything happens for a reason!

Here's to the next guy who will respect you and be worth your time!
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Old 05-05-2012, 06:36 AM   #9
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At least he showed his true colors early on so you don't waste any more of your time on him
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Old 05-05-2012, 08:20 AM   #10
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Agreed. It is not a good sign that he flipped out.
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Old 05-05-2012, 08:49 AM   #11
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He doesn't sound so great after all then if he said some harsh things to you! It's your right to be safe and comfortable and don't let anybody tell you any different. The thing about meeting people online is that you're typing so people have time to think a bit more before they say things and give a certain impression of who they are etc and he showed his true colours. I'm sorry that you were hurt but don't give up. There's genuine nice guys out there too.
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Old 05-05-2012, 08:56 AM   #12
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He should not have flipped.

However, I would not bring someone to a date. I honestly would not have gone on that 1st date with my husband (who I met on Lavalife many moons ago) if he brought a friend, to me that indicates a lack of confidence and not being serious. Choose a public place, don't go alone with him, but a friend.... no, I can't agree with that.
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Old 05-05-2012, 08:58 AM   #13
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You didn't do anything wrong, if he was really interested in getting to know you rather than just getting you into bed he wouldn't have gotten that angry.

I've met a few guys from a dating site and haven't had much more luck than you. But if you are meeting in a public place you probably shouldn't need anyone else with you.
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Old 05-05-2012, 10:23 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sacha View Post
He should not have flipped.

However, I would not bring someone to a date. I honestly would not have gone on that 1st date with my husband (who I met on Lavalife many moons ago) if he brought a friend, to me that indicates a lack of confidence and not being serious. Choose a public place, don't go alone with him, but a friend.... no, I can't agree with that.
I would agree to some extent with this, but better to fly your "I'm an inexperienced dater" flag than to put yourself in a situation where you are really uncomfortable.
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Old 05-05-2012, 10:37 AM   #15
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I think you were lucky this guy didn't work out. I think he had ulterior motives as has already been pointed out.
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