I just need to blow steam.
In December 2011, myself and 130 other employees found out we'd all be out of a job by the end of 2012 (or sooner even) due to being outsourced. That sucked, but I had already made my mind up just under 2 weeks prior to quit my job and move home to go back to school. Even still, because of all the talks and whatnot going on between the union and the employer, everyone here is stressed out and unsure what they're going to do. A lot of panicky people. It makes for a stressful work environment.
In order to get in to the course I want to in September 2013, I need to have five high school courses upgraded by September 2012 to apply in October 2012 (this is the requirement; you have to apply the year BEFORE you want to attend). I have to upgrade Math 12, Physics 11, Biology 12, Chemistry 11, and English 12. I have dyscalculia, basically similar to dyslexia only with math. I suck at math. My math is currently somewhere around a 3rd grade level. I can't multiply, divide, do fractions, integers, etc.
On top of going to school to upgrade those courses, I need to work part time. I'll be working, incidentally enough, for the same outsourcing company likely going to be taking over the work for the job I'm currently at. The pay is better than flippin' burgers and I make my own schedule. Plus, the more I work, the more they pay. I need to work because I have a car payment, car insurance, personal loan (for credit card debt; the loan is almost paid off), and cell phone to pay for. Not to mention I have a dog. My parents aren't charging me rent, food, utilities, etc. It's always been stated that as long as you're going to school, you're welcome to live at home rent-free. If I were just working and not going to school, they'd want rent at the very least. I've absolutely no problem with this whatsoever. I am very, very grateful I have my parents because otherwise, I have no idea what I'd do.
Sometime in December, my dog started to behave strangely while we were training. She's a Labrador retriever and my dad and I do grouse hunt in the Fall and this year we plan to do some duck hunting, so our dogs are trained to get the birds. Nothing great; we don't compete, we don't do hunt tests or field trials, we don't train for retrieves up to 400 yards, etc. Just get the bird, bring it back. Anyway, in December, she started to stop and pee on the way BACK with the ball or the training dummy. Never when she was sent out, never in the house, etc. She wasn't drinking more water. She wasn't asking to go out more. No accidents. Not peeing more on walks, either. JUST when she was coming back in.
I didn't want to correct the behavior until I knew it wasn't a medical issue. I waited until a few weeks ago before taking her in to the vet, mostly because every time I walk in there it's another $200 and I'm broke more often than not. Sure enough, first visit was $116. Urinalysis and exam. The urinalysis comes back with no bacteria, but lots of white blood cells, so they wanted to do a culture and sensitivity on it. They'd also put her on antibiotics. Culture'n sensitivity + antibiotics = $220. (Total so far: $336). So, the vet calls this morning saying that there was no bacteria grown in the culture. Finish up with the antibiotics next week and come in next Friday for another urinalysis ($50). If there are still white blood cells in the urine, we'll have to do an x-ray ($300). Total altogether: $686. If there are no stones (what the x-ray would look for), we might have to do a cystoscopy (I don't even want to think what that costs). Right now, she's not peeing as much as she was before so I think the antibiotics are working.
Last night, however, she jumped up after just laying down in bed with me (and no more than 5 minutes since being outside to do her business), and had an accident in the living room. I was going to get mad at her (she didn't even ask to go out and she's nearly 2 years old) until I saw that the 'accident' was covered in mucus and bright red blood.
You have got to be kidding me.
Now, she's had this once before and it was only one time. I'm going to watch it and see if it happens again. If it persists, then I have to take her back
to the vet to get this
problem looked at and I can't even begin to think about how much THAT is going to cost.
Since October, I have spent more on her at the vet than my parents have spent on their 2 dogs (including their papillon's $60/month epilepsy medication) in an ENTIRE YEAR! I spent about $600 in September/October when she was having hip problems (she has mild hip dysplasia and a bit of arthritis), coupled with the money I've spent so far this time around.
On top of all this, I gave my resignation letter to my boss yesterday. My last day at work will be February 28. I have to tell my landlady tomorrow. I also have a dentist appointment on Thursday (and I ha-a-a-a-te the dentist) because I have several cavities, one of which is now bothering me. So I have to go in for a cleaning (haven't in 3 years), and then go back in for fillings (which cost at least $200 because my extended health plan through work only covers the metal fillings, which I really dislike). I have to be frozen just for the cleaning and sedated for the fillings (sedation which costs extra).
My house is a disaster, and I'm actually calling in sick tomorrow to stay home to clean it up since my mom will be in town on Thursday to bring her friend and her friend's husband back to the States (they live near Seattle) and then she'll be here on the weekend because I need someone to drive me home from getting my filling as I'll be doped up and not legal to drive lo.
I. want. to. scream.
I'm not a really religious person, but they say God only gives you as much as you can handle and I'm really starting to question him/her right now because I truly don't think I can handle much more.
Getting rid of the dog is not an option. She's my best friend and I took on the responsibility of having her so it would be irresponsible to give her away just because of all this. Yes, I have a credit card. I'm trying not to use it much but I guess I'm going to have to - the consolation there is that at least when I quit work here, I can pay the card off so I'm not totally stuck with it. If I can get my Super Annuation (pension) paid out, that'd be even better because that's a LOT of money. If I can't, well then whatever.
I need a vacation, except I can't afford it.