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-   -   Were You Bullied as a Child ? (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/general-chatter/230293-were-you-bullied-child.html)

Sweetcaroline 04-10-2011 07:07 PM

Were You Bullied as a Child ?
 
With so much talk about bullying lately...

I was bullied as a child about being overweight
and some of the name calling and taunts still bother me 40 years later... ouch !

Were you were bullied ?

winning the war 04-10-2011 07:16 PM

I was, for many reasons. It doesn't bother me anymore. Honestly, it was so long ago, and both I and those people have changed (at least the ones who are still alive or not in jail). I find it a waste of energy dwelling on the past when today has so much to offer :o)

kaplods 04-10-2011 08:21 PM

I got my fair share of name calling and insults, but I never felt "victimized," in that I was outgoing and quick-witted enough to avoid the real bullies or turn the tables on them (in a battle of the wits, I usually won).

True bullies mostly attack people who won't fight back (either in words or actions). I was quick witted enough to either make fun of myself before anyone else had a chance to, or make a bigger joke of the bully.

When someone did try to bully me, they'd either learn to leave me alone because I could make them look stupid. Or they'd turn friendly.

The weirdest "friend" I made was in 6th grade. A kid named Kenny was known for being the biggest bully in 6th grade. When we had to line up for lunch or something, he started tugging on a fake ivory necklace I was wearing with beads and a pendant shaped like elephants. He asked if "those" were my relatives and I punched him in the eye. I didn't even think about it, it was a reaction more to him putting his hands on me, than the namecalling.

He was friendly to me the rest of middle school and even joked about my kicking his a** when he signed my "autograph hound" at 8th grade graduation.

Even as a kid, I knew that I was "lucky" to be smart and outgoing, because the worst victims are always the shy kids. They get ripped to shreds.

One of my younger sisters was terribly shy and she got a lot more grief in school than I ever did (and she was thin and pretty).

Serbrider 04-10-2011 08:39 PM

I was called "Debela" by quite a few of the girls from grade 2-4 in the Serbian schools. Debela is the feminine word for "Fat".

Yeah... didn't help that I was shy and slow witted. Not that I think I'm stupid... I just do NOT have quick wit. So when people say something... it takes me several minutes to come up with a comeback... and by that time it just sounds stupid.

sacha 04-10-2011 08:45 PM

Yes, for being skinny, ironically enough! I was naturally skinny (talking 80-90lbs max) and was teased for being scrawny, and for being pale.

Serbrider 04-10-2011 08:50 PM

Oh... and oddly enough... this was back when I really wasn't all that heavy... I mean... I wasn't skinny... but I wasn't heavy either.

krampus 04-10-2011 09:13 PM

I got "ching chonged" as I call it quite a bit. Kids would pull their eyes at me and call me "egg roll" and "won ton" and stuff and tell me to "go back to China." I can't count how many times ignorant kids asked me if I could see with my squinty eyes, though that's just being ignorant/stupid and not bullying.

There were two girls who bullied me for no real reason in middle school and high school. I really have no idea why they did it, but I always had more friends than enemies. I still fantasize about ruining their lives and when I was younger I fantasized about killing them. It's a good thing I'm lazy, because I was totally serious about it. I related more to the Columbine killers than the victims.

MiZTaCCen 04-10-2011 09:13 PM

I was bullied badly as a child, and it wasn't because of my weight or anything it was just my best friends turned against me for no reason and next thing I knew I was hated by pretty much everyone and had no friend. I honestly wouldn't change that for the world because once I hit high school I said never again and no one made fun of me after that because I became stronger and didn't deal with anyone's bull****.

Clydegirl 04-10-2011 09:54 PM

I wasn't bullied but I was called Panda by some mean boys

The funny thing is I would love to be at that weight right now.

ilidawn 04-10-2011 10:27 PM

Quite a bit. I lived overseas and I had to deal with hearing old lady's saying "look at the little pig" and my schoolmates treating me like a freak because I'm half white. Stupidly, I thought that was bad then after moving back the the States I heard all sorts of taunts about my weight including "how could you miss her? she's such a huge target". I guess the moral of the story is that it doesn't matter what country you're from, people suck.

Sweetcaroline 04-10-2011 10:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clydegirl (Post 3801220)
I wasn't bullied but I was called Panda by some mean boys

The funny thing is I would love to be at that weight right now.

Clydegirl... Too funny you say that, it's exactly why I was thinking about this today...

fatferretfanatic 04-10-2011 11:44 PM

I was bullied for a ton of things. I had short hair, and huge boobs for my age. I was really smart and loved to read, and I was bullied. I didn't have the right clothes, apparently I was fat even though I was a very athletic 125 pound 5'6young lady. I remember those things, and I remember the tears I shed beause of them. But, had I not experienced those things, maybe I wouldn't be who I am today and I am not OK with that. Yeah, those people were mean, but they were also kids. I ended up letting people say what they would because I was and am very tender hearted. But, I would rather be sweet and have my feelings hurt than stoop to their level and know I didn't stand by my principals of kindness.

Pint Sized Terror 04-10-2011 11:56 PM

I was mostly bullied for being poor. My mom was mentally ill, and wouldn't even do laundry, so yeah, lots of bullying.

After I moved out of her house and in with my grandparents, the bullying shifted to talking about my weight (even though I wasn't overweight, and was underweight at some points) and teasing about being a "spaz". (I have ADHD)

This one day a guy I liked told me I had cottage cheese thighs. To this day I don't have the self confidence to wear shorts in public without feeling bad. :(

ilidawn 04-11-2011 12:39 AM

krampus oh man...I had blocked those memories. Kids are so cruel. I heard those things too along with a constant barrage of questions all following the template of "do they use *insert anything* in china?" It never got through their thick heads that Singapore isn't China, of course there are things like toilets and toothbrushes there, my vision isn't impaired, and dark brown hair isn't the same as black..the "ching chong" thing was incredibly offensive but teachers never stopped them.

kaplods 04-11-2011 01:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ilidawn (Post 3801400)
krampus the "ching chong" thing was incredibly offensive but teachers never stopped them.

This is what I never understood even as a kid - how the adults could look on and watch the horrific bullying, and any kid who interferred on the victim's behalf was likely to be punished.

My sisters are 14 and 16 years younger than I. But my brother is not quite 2 years younger. So we were in school together. He and I both were defenders of the bullied. Me with my big mouth, and my brother with his fists.

What I hated most was the teachers actually taking sides. Oh they never said anything directly, but you learned which kids the teachers hated, bercause they not only ignored the bullying they'd punish any kid who tried to intervene on the victim's behalf.

I don't remember the bullies nearly as much as the teachers who allowed and subtly encouraged bullying - the one's who would smile smugly when some kid was being torchered by the other kids. I don't remember as many teachers who would look the other way (except the P.E. teachers. I think "meanness" was a job requirement or something). But in gradeschool some teachers seemed to enjoy watching kids get bullied (especially some kids). Some teachers would even wait to break up a fight if the victim was a kid they didn't like. You could almost count how many punches and kicks the teacher would watch before breaking it up. And as often as not, they'd blame the victim for the fight no matter what the kids witnessing the fight said.

As a kid I had dark fantasies of those teachers being beaten by a mob of all the bullied kids and all the kids who had been punished (or given dirty looks) for trying to come to the rescue of a bully victim.

I still find it hard to fathom how a teacher could watch a seven year-old get bloodied and watch the kid get beaten and pretend not to see it for several kicks and punches, just because they "don't like" the kid getting beaten.

I wasn't shy with kids, but I was afraid of the mean teachers (I thought who would believe a kid over a teacher?). Some of us kids talked about going to the principle, but we never did, because we didn't think anyone would believe us or we thought we'd get beaten up by bullies (I think we half believed that the mean teachers were in league with the bullies, and told them who to pick on).


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