Baby urges are just biology, probably triggered by the coworker. When you are ready across the board, you will be ready across the board -- not just bio, but finances, emotional resources, space in the home, time resources, spirit, mental, etc. BUT REALLY EXAMINE YOUR RESOURCES!
Don't just "make room if it happens." Even if you are rolling in money, you are not rolling in everything else.
I don't care what others say -- there's
only 24 hours in a day. Right now you have a spouse, you, and your kid. That's 5 relationships. You have to sleep 8 hrs. And another 8 at least whether you are a WOHM or SAHM doing the non-kid duties.
Which leaves you 8 hrs in which to have these relationships:
- You by yourself
- You and your spouse
- You and your kid
- Your spouse and your kid
- All 3 of you.
Everyone gets something like 90 min each.
Add another kid? That's not adding one new relationship. You get
- You by yourself
- You and your spouse
- You and your kid
- Your spouse and your kid
- All 3 of you.
PLUS
- You and new kid
- Kid and new kid.
- Spouse and new kid.
- You and kid and new kid.
- You and spouse and new kid.
- Spouse and kid and new kid.
- You and spouse and kid and new kid.
Now you are down to a bit more than 30 min each, and you know it isn't going to be "fair" like that.
Even if the kids are playing together and building their kid & new kid relationship, guess what? You'll be there as referee.
Even if fairly distributed in terms of time for each relationship, the two kids will still suck up most of the time because there's only 2 relationships going on that don't have a kid or both kids in it somewhere. (Yourself and you and spouse)
That may be sacrificed in service to the kids -- leaving you with no "me time," no "couple time" and rarely one-on-one time with the kids.
They usually get lumped together or the eldest gets fobbed on dad while mom does baby care because she's the one nursing.
And that's just the time resource. We haven't even gotten to the other resources -- emotional, spiritual, mental, space in home, etc.
If you want to cuddle a baby, it would be a whole lot easier to offer to babysit the coworker's baby!
A.