Sort of off topic, but I could really use support and Im sure Im not the only one hanging on by a thread this time of year
Some of us are predisposed to certain type of ailments, I tend to think my body is predisposed to handling stress especially poorly. This post is half rant and half asking for help!
My body gets a host of physical symptoms including acid overproduction (which eats away at my stomach lining and feels like one gigantic ulcer with nausea, acute pain, lack of appetite, etc), muscle cramping/insane golf ball size lumps in my shoulders, backwards breathing and general tightness in my diaphragm, sleeping problems and night sweats, crying, and a general feeling of being entirely overwhelmed.
My job isnt THAT stressful, its just software no one is going to die! But I do direct and coordinate the work of about 60 people and they can be a real pain in my butt. Lately its been more a pain than usual. I swear sometimes they try to drive me insane.
This time last year I also had my heart cruelly broken by a bf and my sociopath of a mother stopped talking to m again for absolutely no reason other than the fact she is a sociopath. I feel a little like Im reliving those moments and given they were wrapped up in the holidays it just hurts/sucks/makes me cry like a freaking baby.
Im single, have no real family to speak of and my few good friends live hundreds to thousands of miles away. Which means there is simply never anyone to help, I just have to suck it up and do it all on my own.
Mostly I just want a hug. I dont want someone to fix my problems, just give me a hug at the end of the day.
What do you do when you are at the end of your rope and hanging on by a thread? I would love to hear everyone else's coping mechanisms to see if I can find a new strategy.
I have some go to things I try to do:
- acupuncture (only thing that remotely helps the stomach pain, went this am for the first time in 6+ months and going back next Friday)
- breathing and/or meditating
- working out (this can make my stomach acid issue feel much worse, but overall it does def help destress)
- finding people to hang out with, especially if it involves physical touch (getting my nails done, flying out to see friends and asking for hugs from those I know well enough to ask for one from!)
- eating decently (enough protein and not too many carbs but def some)
My acupuncturist had some interesting suggestions/thoughts today...he said 1) even though Im craving salt, eat less. he said its a kidney/adrenal deficiency that is causing the craving but that I should just rest more and I dont really need the salt, its just making me swell a bit and that isnt helping anything 2) breathe!! he said not getting enough oxygen actually helps those nasty golf ball size lumps in my shoulders form because of something about the blood oxygen levels and lactic acid build up 3) eat more alkaline foods to reduce the acidity of my tummy. 4) eat more good carbs since they are easy to digest.
I woke up at a weight all time low of 121. Not thinking I should lose anymore weight, but when Im crying and wanting to puke all the time, eating isnt really my top priority.