There's a saying in my family that after three days, fish and family start to stink. How true that is. Of course we had the big production of Thanksgiving and everyone flew in from all over. And of course, just like always, it ended in disaster.
I am very sensitive. My feelings get hurt fairly easily and my family knows this. And yet, last night at dinner, I heard many hurtful comments about how lazy I am (for not helping to do the dishes after lunch), and how my job is hurtful to this country because I make decisions about medicaid and food stamps for families in need of resources in the area, and they said "all of those people are just working the system so they can sit on their a***s all day and do drugs." That's very hurtful to me because I take a lot of pride in what I do, and a lot of the families I work with (I only work with families with children, who have been reported to us for child abuse and neglect) mean a lot to me. And I can see the difference I'm making, even if mom and dad ARE lazy drug addicts, my actions may help those children learn to make better decisions for their futures.
So, I stood up for myself. I told them I felt hurt by what they were saying and didn't appreciate it. And they retorted that I always have to make everything a fight and I ruin all family get togethers with my sensitivities. Which also hurts, to be told that they think I'm the reason things don't go well. I tried to explain in a rational way that they had hurt my feelings, but I was getting upset and emotional and had to leave because I know myself, and there would have been a bigger issue had I stayed.
Now my sister is telling me she doesn't want me in her wedding because I walked out on a family dinner and upset my mom. I know that none of you were there, and of course there are two sides to every story, but does anyone have any advice on how to deal with people who don't seem to care if they hurt your feelings? I can't tell you how many times I've tried to explain to them that I'm truly hurt by some of the things they've said to me in the past, with the only response being "You're too overdramatic, stop making everyone else's lives harder." hmph.