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Once a fat chick, now you're a skinny b****

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Old 08-20-2010, 08:55 PM   #1
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Default Once a fat chick, now you're a skinny b****

Have you noticed that while dropping pounds, you gained an attitude? Like, I had a friend and she lost about 40 pounds and I've just noticed how nasty she became. Like, she had the nerve to talk about how fat another woman was and I was thinking "Dude! That was you last year!!!" It just shocked me, and I'll have to admit, there have been times I've made comments about someones size that I would have NEVER made when I was 267.

Has anyone else noticed that personality change in themselves or others?
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Old 08-20-2010, 09:10 PM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Brown View Post
I don't find myself doing that. I wonder if there's a difference between those who've been not-fat before and those who've always been overweight and are feeling all sorts of things they've never felt before, like confidence.
Makes alot of sense.
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Old 08-20-2010, 09:16 PM   #3
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I don't find myself doing that. I wonder if there's a difference between those who've been not-fat before and those who've always been overweight and are feeling all sorts of things they've never felt before, like confidence.
Hmm interesting. I'll admit it, I do have a bit of an attitude now, but only when it's appropriate like with personal friends in PRIVATE or only in my head. And I was a "non-fat" before I was fat. So I'm not sure if that makes a difference. I'll be interested to see others responses. I will say I'm not exactly proud of my attitude sometimes, but it's there. I try to keep in check as best I can because if I'm not careful I could end up in those shoes again. I have to work hard everyday to maintain and part of that is staying humble and keeping the attitude in check.
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Old 08-20-2010, 09:24 PM   #4
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OMG MY GRANDMOTHER DOES THAT ALL THE FREAKING TIME!

She used to be really big, up until she was about fifty. She ended up getting gastric bypass, losing a bunch, and now she acts like she has the right to judge people who are fat. I've come THIS close several times to being like, hey just because you cut out three quarters of your stomach and finally shed 200 pounds doesn't mean you're suddenly better than anyone. Lately she's been making snide little comments towards me, and I actually turned around and said, 'Meme you were fat for fifty years before you finally figured this out. I'm twenty three years old, you're no better than me. Lay off!'

She is TICKING ME OFF. Get the heck over yourself. Sometimes I walk out of the room while she's still talking about what a fat whale some woman on tv is.
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Old 08-20-2010, 09:25 PM   #5
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I was always fat. I don't really notice any changes in the ways I judge other people. I never judged before based on body type or weight, and I don't now.

I'm trying to work on not judging on other criteria. Even if I just do it in my head, its not right. It's definitely a side I don't like about myself.
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Old 08-20-2010, 10:00 PM   #6
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I don't know if I judge in a nasty way, but when I see a really big person who's obviously having a hard time of it buying tons and tons of sugar and junk food at my work... in my head I'm like "God... please... put it DOWN for your own sake! Don't DOOOOOOO it....!" I guess I feel bad for them.... and bad for me, that I used to be like that.
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Old 08-20-2010, 10:06 PM   #7
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Maybe not a b*** judging others, but I think I picked up an attitude on food pushers and people that are mean to fat people (because I was there, I think it will always hit a nerve when someone says something about a fat person/people).

I don't find myself ever judging fat or obese people, but if they are very big were I kinda do a double take, I feel bad for them and wonder what's going on in their life that they do that to themselves. I figure if it's not medical, it's probably emotional and stress. I've been fat all my life, so I guess I know how hard it actually is to lose weight and how food can control your days and life.

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Old 08-20-2010, 10:39 PM   #8
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Yes I am but only to myself, I do not voice any of the thoughts in my head about others around me because it is so judgmental. I feel so bad about it and NO ONE hears anything I think. and if one more co-worker comes by my office with German Chocolate cake, I am going to shove it down their throats..lol
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Old 08-20-2010, 11:02 PM   #9
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I've seen it alot in others. Friends who became self-righteous and down-right cruel when they've lost weight. I've even seen people do it after gaining and relosing (if a person learns the hard way, how easy it is to regain, you'd think they'd be less judgemental the second time around).

Being the victim of it too many times, has made me vow never to stand in that place myself.. Of course, I've struggled with my weight for nearly 40 years, for me to become self-righteous or judgemental would be hugely hypocritical.

Also, my degrees in psychology and my years working in social service, substance abuse, and law enforcement, I've also gained a unique understanding of just how difficult any change is. I saw people trying to pull their lives together, wanting to change destructive behavior patterns, and having just as much difficulty as I did with my weight. I recognized the potential hypocracy there too. I think it made me more compassionate and more effective in my job. I know I had many probation clients tell me that I really helped them because I treated them like human beings and not like idiots or "filthy criminals."

Change is hard, and if we lose sight of that we risk hurthing others and ourselves.
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Old 08-20-2010, 11:13 PM   #10
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Brilliant Kaplods.

I am not only working on my eating/exercise habits, I am making an effort to change how I think. I have a very judgmental family, and now I can see that I too am judgmental. This will be a great thread for me to fallow. I never say mean things, but I do think along the lines of "oh poor so and so" or over-attribute social, and economical reasons to others obesity. I'm working on seeing people as multi-dimensional. Something I have always thought I did, but have more recently realized otherwise.
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Old 08-20-2010, 11:21 PM   #11
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One thing I've noticed when it comes to dating...as my weight goes down, my standards go up. I swear I used to date more when I was fatter. Now, I'm kind of a snob...LOL
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Old 08-21-2010, 12:07 AM   #12
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I don't think that my attitude towards other peoples' sizes has changed much. I was never too big, but I was always overweight. And definitely uncomfortable in my own skin because of my weight. I don't really pity overweight people because they have the ability to make right choices and change it if they want to. But I do have empathy. I understand how hard it is to walk in those shoes, and I understand how hard it is to start making the right choices. I feel for them, and I hope that one day they'll be able to find the strength to change (IF they want to, of course).

That being said, a few of my large friends have snipped at me for having skinny-b**** moments. But I don't think I have been out of line. For example, this morning I was bloated from just starting my TOM and I just felt puffy and frumpy and uncomfortable. I mentioned that I was having a major fat day, and my friend said "oh hush, you're TINY, don't say things like that, it just makes us feel bad." I certainly do not mean to make people feel bad, and I don't want to be considered a skinny b**** at all. I guess some things are interpreted differently when you're a different size.
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Old 08-21-2010, 12:37 PM   #13
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I think people that are rude to others and make nasty comments have not just gotten this way from losing weight, but have been that way their whole lifes and they now feel as if they can say something because they've lost a certain amount of weight.
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Old 08-21-2010, 12:44 PM   #14
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i don't make nasty comments or say rude things to people, but when i see women who are a similar size to what i used to be doing different things i wonder if that's how i used to look...i always feel bad about it afterwards, not that i think they look bad, but because i'm comparing myself to them.

i have found that i am overly protective of overweight people now. when i used to hear people making fat jokes about people my size or smaller i would join in...because i was bigger to, so it somehow justified it. now, though, i get really angry, especially when it's said by someone who's never had weight issues. i guess it's one of those, we can make fun of ourselves, but you can't make fun of us, things

occassionally i'll find myself thinking i'm the size i used to be and make a comment about being a "fat-girl at heart" around someone who didn't know me when i was bigger. i always get nasty looks when i do that...guess i need to be more aware of it.
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Old 08-21-2010, 12:45 PM   #15
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Quote:
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I think people that are rude to others and make nasty comments have not just gotten this way from losing weight, but have been that way their whole lifes and they now feel as if they can say something because they've lost a certain amount of weight.
I agree.
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