3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community  

Go Back   3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community > Support Forum > General chatter

General chatter Because life isn't just about dieting. Play games, jokes, or share what's new in your life!

Embarrassed for him to see you naked?

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 03-19-2010, 04:04 PM   #1
on a journey
 
Lisa_C's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Ohio
Posts: 535

Default Embarrassed for him to see you naked?

The guy i'm involved with sexually saw me naked, for the first time. i will admit, i was embarrassed ladies.

We were involved 10 years ago, i was skinny back then, now i'm slightly under 250. What made me not feel quite so bad is, he's not skinny anymore either.


Does anyone else out there fight those feelings of embarrassment with husbands, lovers, bf's?
__________________
Lisa



Lisa_C is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2010, 04:13 PM   #2
Let go laughing
 
s rosa's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Grafenwoehr, Germany
Posts: 112

S/C/G: 265/254/150

Height: 5'10"

Default

OH yeah. It's awful. It's really had a serious impact on our sex life. I'm just really really embarrassed. He's never said anything to me about it, he always says I'm beautiful and sexy no matter how much I weigh, but still. The shame is still there. It helps when I'm working out, though - even if I haven't visibly changed, I feel so much better about myself just because I know I'm up and moving. When I lie around on the couch all day eating chips, I (shockingly) feel about as un-sexy as a person can feel.

You know what's funny, though, is that DH is insecure about being so skinny. He is rail-thin, and he wants to be buff, but the man has this sky-high metabolism. But I still think he's the sexiest man there is, even if he doesn't think so. So when it gets really bad, I try to remember how *I* feel about *him* despite what he thinks about himself, so he's probably not lying when he says he thinks I'm sexy, since I'm not lying when I say it to him. If you can follow that convoluted mess.
__________________
"You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have."
Mini-goal #1: 249
s rosa is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2010, 04:26 PM   #3
Healthy is Beautiful
 
ThicknPretty's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Chattanooga, TN
Posts: 719

S/C/G: 214/144/160

Height: 5"8

Default

Iím getting better! The guy Iím dating now is very complimentary and encourages me to be confident and is really patient. He doesnít make me feel pressured and seems happy whether Iím fully clothed or otherwise.

For a long time though, I was the girl who turned the lights off, left her shirt on and stayed under the covers. And now, that embarrassed me more than anything! How unsexy is that?? ďYes, we can be intimate, but no intimacy please.Ē Lol. I was actually surprised to discover that I enjoy sex more naked (sorry if thatís TMI). Itís liberating and Iíve never had anyone run screaming from the room, which in itís own weird way is a little confidence boost.

I think thereís always insecurity though.
ThicknPretty is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2010, 05:29 PM   #4
Junior Member
 
Seraph's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Northern VA
Posts: 28

S/C/G: 242/242/120

Height: 5'3"

Default

I'm embarassed about my *doctor* seeing me naked, forget about men!
Seraph is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2010, 05:52 PM   #5
Senior Member
 
squishysquirrel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Alabama
Posts: 172

S/C/G: 213.3/206.4/125

Height: 5'4.5

Default

I am slightly embarassed when I'm naked around my fiance. My weight doesn't bother him, but I feel like a fat slob. I have noticed that when I'm on track and working out, I feel sexier and not embarassed at all. Now if only I could make a lifelong habit of working out.
squishysquirrel is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-19-2010, 06:31 PM   #6
Senior Member
 
mom4life's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 722

S/C/G: 184/129/130

Height: 5'4.5"

Default

I was thinner when we got married and (we both) gradually gained the weight over the years. I became self-conscience when I became serious about losing the weight. I took before shots and was in shock that I didn't look like I did when I was thin, I guess I went through life thinking I still looked the same even though my clothes were bigger. Anyways I remember the first time being intimate after beginning my weight loss and thinking "Oh gosh, what must he be thinking?" Afterwards I told him how I was feeling and he just laughed and said that he loved me no matter what size I was.
__________________
Rachel
Highest: 184
weight lost since my journey began 2009 ( per 5 lbs):

mom4life is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-20-2010, 06:31 PM   #7
Senior Member
 
neonwildflower's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Quebec City, QC
Posts: 311

S/C/G: 330/287/200

Height: 5'9"

Default

This has been a huge problem in my relationship. The big problem is that my soon-to-be-ex boyfriend never said things about me being beautiful, sexy, etc. Instead I had to struggle with the negativity coming from myself, and no affirmations from him. I don't mean to say that my confidence would have come from him, but it certainly doesn't help boost one's ego when you already feel fat and gross and you're not given any encouragement to the contrary. Not planning to let anyone see me naked for a very long time now.
neonwildflower is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-20-2010, 08:58 PM   #8
Senior Member
 
CanadianCutie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: London, ON
Posts: 1,619

S/C/G: 331/292.2/250(for now)

Height: 5'3"

Default

I have to say, when I first started dating my boyfriend (we met and got to know each other online first), I was really worried about how things would go in the bedroom. He'd never been with a plus sized woman, so there was the normal insecurity about being with someone new, as well as the "what if he isn't physically attracted to me" issue. I needn't have worried. He's wonderful, always very affectionate, and tells me I'm beautiful and sexy all the time.
__________________


www.goodreads.com/Saela

Doing this one day at a time.

Reboot 296.4/Week 1 292.2/
CanadianCutie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-20-2010, 10:08 PM   #9
Senior Member
 
angelskeep's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Cody, Wyoming
Posts: 982

S/C/G: 243/190/150

Height: 5'4"

Default

Dunno if it helps, but when I was MUCH younger and MUCH thinner, I was still worried. So for those of you who have always been big girls...everyone has insecurities, even the younger thinner girls. 30 years and many extra pounds, I am right back where I started...feeling like I want to just disappear.

Barb
angelskeep is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-20-2010, 10:44 PM   #10
Cheesecake? Yes plz!
 
LuckyJules's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Little Canada, Minnesota
Posts: 174

S/C/G: 155/149.8/135

Height: 5'7"

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by s rosa View Post
But I still think he's the sexiest man there is, even if he doesn't think so. So when it gets really bad, I try to remember how *I* feel about *him* despite what he thinks about himself, so he's probably not lying when he says he thinks I'm sexy, since I'm not lying when I say it to him.
Bingo! That's what I remind myself all the time -- he proposed to *me* and he wants to be intimate with *me* and I want that with him and only him. You and I, we think alike about this!
__________________


Mini Goal: 140lbs Main Goal: 135lbs Ultimate Goal: 130lbs


Hi, I'm Julie!
LuckyJules is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-20-2010, 10:55 PM   #11
Lorie
 
glenlorie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: South Oklahoma
Posts: 329

S/C/G: 280/ticker/160

Height: 5'7

Default

I have those feelings quite a bit!!! I gained 90 pounds in two years (two pregnancies on total bed rest) and 2 c-sections, so I look totally different then when my husband and I first got together. It took a huge toll on our sex life, I didn't want him to look at me, touch me, or even tell me he thought I looked beautiful because I didn't believe it myself, so I just assumed he was lying to me. I still have a lot of work to do, but just working out has made me feel a little better about everything, more energy and just all around feeling better.
I finally talked to my husband about it, and he is thin and handsome, but he told me about everything he told me he was insecure about HIMSELF, and I was soooo shocked because everything he THOUGHT he needed to change were absolutely perfect to me and I couldn't believe he was insecure about them.
So in reality, the man you are with probably is having insecure feelings about himself, not you, and most importantly if he wasn't attracted to you, he wouldn't have put himself in the position to see you naked!
I hope this helps, good luck and keep reaching your goals!!
glenlorie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-20-2010, 11:05 PM   #12
Watch Me Shrink!
 
SlimBy2011's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Houston, Tx
Posts: 102

S/C/G: 168/159/135

Height: 5'2

Default

My bf can only see me naked in pieces. I just can't let him see me naked all the way.
SlimBy2011 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-21-2010, 05:27 PM   #13
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Moorestown, NJ
Posts: 255

Height: 5'4"

Default

Given my body image and self-condifence issues - and the fact I don't even like people to see my body *with* clothes, much less without, I always thought I would be very shy about being naked in sexual situations.

In reality, and luckily, during those situations I'm completely in the moment and completely unworried about how I look. Those are some of the only times in my life where I experience that kind of free feeling. It's very nice and I'm very glad it's worked out that way for me.
__________________
Expunge is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-21-2010, 05:39 PM   #14
Junior Member
 
Twitter's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 21

S/C/G: 219/219/140

Height: 5'5"

Default

my husband has always been great about telling me I look beautiful, no matter what, but I have found myself lately feeling very unattractive and not wanting him to see me in certain situations. It is not fair to him for me to pull back on our intimacy so I need to work on that myself
Twitter is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-21-2010, 06:53 PM   #15
Senior Member
 
AnnieDrews's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 2,543

S/C/G: 191/Ticker/140

Height: 5'3" Age 51

Default

I thought I would chime in here. My fiance has always made me feel beautiful. It's very reassuring to me. However, I've always felt uncomfortable for one reason or another, even when I was in my twenties. I know I'll never look like I did in my twenties again, but my attitude about ALOT of things has changed over the years, especially sex. I look forward to the time when I can comfortably be naked at 2:00 in the afternoon or at 11:00 at night. Maybe someday even plan on a Naked Sunday....! I've heard of couples that do that and I think it would be awesome to feel that comfortable without my clothes.

I liked the comment about remembering how much you love your husband, no matter what he looks like. I know I would love my fiance as much as I do now if for some reason his physical appearance changed.
__________________
AnnieDrews is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply
Posts by members, moderators and admins are not considered medical advice
and no guarantee is made against accuracy.


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
What will you do when you're fit & healthy? 2Fat4myJeans Weight Loss Support 53 03-31-2007 10:34 PM
300+ And Ready To Try Again.. #874 brandnewme 300+ Club 31 04-04-2006 02:33 AM
300+ And Ready To Try Again....#279 QueenB Weight Loss Support 30 02-08-2003 01:46 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 02:59 PM.






Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.3.2