[Primm]

Maybe I missed something...I'm not the brightest bulb on the tree...but I have not got the impression from anybody here that the OP poster lie about her beliefs...in fact I find it to be quite the opposite in support for her to follow her DH's advice.

Maybe I misinterpreted then, because that's certainly how I read this:

"So in your situation I think it would be a great comfort to your child to give him what he needs right now, and that's peace of mind. You don't have to use the words heaven or anything, but you could explain to me that once you die you've gone somewhere else and will be watching over him and will always be there for him."

This certainly sounds like suggesting that the OP tell her son the opposite to what she believes to me, or am I reading more into it than is there?

[Passionista]

Originally Posted by sunflowergirl68

Would you talk about existentialism to kids? You have to be careful explaining these things to kids or else it could severely affect them. You have to be so careful in the way that you talk to kids about things. Why freak your kid out just because you don't believe in an afterlife?

Talk about existentialism? Yes, would, have and will continue to.
Personally, I think telling kids that a strange fat man in a red suit sneaks into everyone's houses around the world (oh wait, not everyone, just the Christians, those who believe in Jesus!) is a horribly frightening and inappropriate thing to do. Don't get me started on the EASTER BUNNY!!!

What about loving puppies and eating chickens? How about that disconnect? A value system that is inconsistent is a challenging thing to balance and can confuse and frighten children.

Originally Posted by sunflowergirl68

And I personally think it's very selfish of parents to only explain their beliefs (or only one point of view), and not multiple ones. I really don't think it's fair to anyone's child if they're only raised with one spiritual point of view. I still have wounds from my religious upbringing and i would have really appreciated some variety.

Variety is the 'Spice of (the after) life!'

Originally Posted by sunflowergirl68

I think the best thing to say is that you really don't know what happens when you die, but you hope that you'll be together.

Yep!

[sunflowergirl68]

i've never met one kid who was scared of the idea of Santa. Maybe those creepy mall Santas, but you're an adult. Of course you'd think the idea of that is frightening once you break it down logically. Kids don't really do that.

[Passionista]

Originally Posted by sunflowergirl68

Of course you'd think the idea of that is frightening once you break it down logically. Kids don't really do that.

I did, as a child I understood it wasn't feasible and it was a scary thought to begin with. I was a preschool teacher and heard many stories of others who did too.

[EZMONEY]

I saw the quote PRIMM...I see what you meant....I didn't read every word of the posts but I stick with my "feeling" that most were not advising the OP to lie.

Truce?

Originally Posted by Passionista

......
Personally, I think telling kids that a strange fat man in a red suit sneaks into everyone's houses around the world (oh wait, not everyone, just the Christians, those who believe in Jesus!) is a horribly frightening and inappropriate thing to do. Don't get me started on the EASTER BUNNY!!!

What about loving puppies and eating chickens?

Hummm....well I am a christian and I never told my kids that Santa would come into their house if they believed in JESUS.

I have never heard that from any of my christian friends or family either.

I do know many non-christians though that share the magic of Santa with their families at Christmas times and never speak of Jesus.

I do love puppies and I do eat chickens.

[sunflowergirl68]

My parents are Episcopalian and they told me about Santa. They've always been Christian and my dad's parents started an Episcopalian church in their house.

Why exactly would non-Christians talk about Jesus at all? They're not Christian... I guess I don't understand why you would say that.

[pixiefalls]

Same here. My parents are Christians and me and my sister were told about Santa. It's not something we believed in though. We just knew about it.. I never found anything wrong with it. I also like puppies and eat chicken.

[Passionista]

Apparently my sense of humor/irony is not common

[EZMONEY]

Originally Posted by Passionista

Apparently my sense of humor/irony is not common

No problem here....a lot of folks here don't get my attempt at humor from time to time either

I think some of us were just trying to explain that Christians don't worship Santa....he does not enter the birth of Christ story in our churches or our homes...

but Santa is part of the "magic" of Christmas for many folks...Christians or not.

Christians don't mind being accused of what we really believe but it does irritate us to be accused of things we don't.

In a few weeks we will have an easter egg hunt at church...little kids will be waiting with baskets to hunt for those Easter bunny eggs...

but we won't be celebrating the bunny in our worship services

Off to work....

be good

[Passionista]

Lest we derail this thread further, I'll just briefly say this:

Many people believe different things and it's their belief, it don't have to make sense or have to be logical or be consistent with the beliefs of anyone else (even people who profess to be of the same religion etc.).

I don't think that Christians "worship Santa". That would be a funny altar or church service!

I don't believe that *all* Christians tell their children about Santa or teach their children that only good Christians get presents on "Christ's Birthday". Have I heard people tell their children this before? Yes.

There are no absolutes.

Originally Posted by EZMONEY

No problem here....a lot of folks here don't get my attempt at humor from time to time either

I think some of us were just trying to explain that Christians don't worship Santa....he does not enter the birth of Christ story in our churches or our homes...

but Santa is part of the "magic" of Christmas for many folks...Christians or not.

Christians don't mind being accused of what we really believe but it does irritate us to be accused of things we don't.

In a few weeks we will have an easter egg hunt at church...little kids will be waiting with baskets to hunt for those Easter bunny eggs...

but we won't be celebrating the bunny in our worship services

Off to work....

be good

[sunflowergirl68]

The only bad thing I can think of in not telling your kid(s) about Santa is that they'll obviously hear about it at school from their friends, come home and as you about it, and then what do you say? That Santa isn't real and that he's just a commercial figure made up by some company?

I'd worry that they'd go back to school and tell all of their friends and ruin it for them.

[JulieJ08]

I have no idea what to think about Santa. But it's pretty outrageous if parents feel they have to teach their kids to believe in Santa because other parents do! There's some kind of serious problem there.

[sunflowergirl68]

I hardly think something like that is a serious problem....

[mandalinn82]

This thread has moved well beyond the original topic, and into an argument about Santa (which has nothing to do with a child's worry about death). I think the OP has gotten a lot of good advice and opinions, and I'm going to go ahead and close.