For the Santa Parents: At what age did the kids find out there was no Santa?

BornToFly · 11-20-2009, 10:12 PM

There is NOOOOO SANTA??

I was older actually. 4th grade!

ETA: I found out cause I was waiting in my parents station wagon and wondered what was a blanket doing in the back, I threw it back and saw wrapped presents that read from Santa. I went in and asked my mom, "sooooo, did santa come to our CAR early?"

Aclai4067 · 11-20-2009, 10:20 PM

I don't remember our ages, but I found out younger that there is no Santa because my older sister figured it out. We stuck a note up the chimney to see if he replied. Our parents never sat us down and told us. We still get presents "from santa" and our parents joke that if we don't believe we don't get to keep those ones.

One of my friends didn't find out until 8th grade... we still make fun of her for it.

Primm · 11-21-2009, 12:27 AM

I'm not sure. I never told them. I remember overhearing a conversation when the eldest who was about 11 was telling his brother (8), "I know too, but don't say anything to mum and dad because then they might stop giving us presents!"

They are now 18 and 16, and we still put their presents into a sack in the middle of the night on Christmas eve. Sad, huh?

Heidi58 · 11-21-2009, 02:15 PM

I'd be leery of taking the chance that my child would hear 'the truth' on the school bus or playground - I'd much rather have the discussion at home. As an elementary school teacher I've seen some pretty nasty scenarios.

This might be a good year for your family to read Chris Van Allsberg's The Polar Express.

Quote:

At one time, most of my friends could hear the bell, but as years passed, it fell silent for all of them. Even Sarah found one Christmas that she could no longer hear its sweet sound. Though I've grown old, the bell still rings for me, as it does for all who truly believe.

Even though we all get to the age where we want and need to know the truth - it's nice to have the reassurance that it's OK to keep believing if you want to...

branflake · 11-22-2009, 01:59 AM

My son is 5 and honestly, I'm not sure he believes in Santa fully. lol Since he was about 3 he's always insisted that the guys in the suits at the mall and in random other places were "strangers in a costume". No matter what we said, he still didn't believe that they were really Santa. So, eventually we stopped pushing it. He also pointed out last year when he was 4 that the gifts from Santa couldn't possibly really be from Santa since they were wrapped in paper that we have in the spare room closet. Oops. Never thought I'd have to hide the wrapping paper. I didn't think he'd ever seen it.

I stopped believing at 4. My parents told me not to look in their bedroom days before Christmas. That is an invitation TO look. So, I snuck a peek. Then on Christmas morning, there was a beautiful handmade dollhouse "from Santa". The same one I had seen being built in their room only days before. I fessed up and they tried to convince me that the Elves needed extra help that year. So, they had been enlisted as "Elf Helpers". I didn't buy it. So the Santa illusion was over....

mtloser · 11-22-2009, 06:57 PM

My yougest will be 12 next week and as of last year he still believed in Santa Claus.. however just two nights ago he told us a joke he heard at school about Santa not being real... so I don't know for sure now. I keep asking my husband to find out but he won't ask him..LOL

cathydoe · 11-22-2009, 10:45 PM

WHAT! No Santa? Please tell me it ain't so!!

HotWings · 11-22-2009, 11:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Heidi58

I'd be leery of taking the chance that my child would hear 'the truth' on the school bus or playground - I'd much rather have the discussion at home. As an elementary school teacher I've seen some pretty nasty scenarios.

This might be a good year for your family to read Chris Van Allsberg's The Polar Express.
Even though we all get to the age where we want and need to know the truth - it's nice to have the reassurance that it's OK to keep believing if you want to...

Those were my thoughts exactly. I'd rather break it the way I want it done so that he can understand and not be hurt. I used to be an elem. teacher, too - so I know what you mean. And about it being okay to believe - that is how I have been presenting it all along. My son asked me twice last year if Santa was real (that's why I suspect he is pretty skeptical at this point) - both times I said, "If you believe it in your heart." So the idea is.. to tell him that Santa is not a real person, but Santa is that special magical feeling you get inside at Christmas time. We just add to the magic by doing the gifts.

cathydoe: If you believe it in your heart, Santa is REAL!!!

I am enjoying all these stories!!

HotWings · 11-22-2009, 11:08 PM

branflake: We told ours that the Santa's they see during the holiday season are really just helpers that collect the lists for Santa. I credit DH for that one - he had to think pretty fast on his feet.

They haven't asked one question about them since.

k8t · 11-23-2009, 12:30 AM

My oldest started asking me around 8 by asking if I still believed in Santa. I told her I did believe in him, but not in the same way she did. Then I also started hinting that Santa was not exactly as little kids think, because little kids think in terms of black and white, yes and no...however, as we become older we are mature enough to understand the difference between the make believe stories people tell and the "real" parts. I also told her that unfortunately some children hear about it before they are ready to understand, and that is what makes them nonbelievers. I told her we could talk about it more whenever she wanted. At the time, she told me she wanted to wait, and I did until she asked me to explain it a year later. At 9, we talked about Saint Nicholas and the real spirit of Christmas, and how you can see and feel it around you if you look carefully for it. We talked about the displays in the stores, music, etc...and how they were fun,but not really what Christmas was about. We noticed the nice things people did for each other that they unfortunately don't do at other times, and we also did secret things to help "Santa" out too. (An excellent book for this if you can get a copy is "Santa, Are You For Real?" by Harold Myra.) We also hung a stocking up on our fireplace for Jesus when we decorated for Christmas, and took turns at dinner saying what things we did for others that day that we could offer to Jesus as a gift for his birthday. (We wrote those things on slips of paper and added them to the stocking each day.) We still continue to do this each year. This way one Christmas magic and tradition was replaced by another.

Anyway, that's how we handled it. If you ask her today as a freshman in High School, she'll still smile at you and tell you she's a believer.

Thighs Be Gone · 11-23-2009, 01:28 AM

We have a family in our class that has never allowed their children to believe in Santa. Well, thats fine except that their kids went around last year and told everyone there was no Santa, no Easter Bunny, no tooth fairy, etc. A friend of mine called their mother and asked that she tell them to stop. The mother replied, "we are all about truth and I am not about to tell my kids to stop telling the truth!" My friend said to her, "well, just to warn you--my 7 year old knows all about sex so don't be surprised with what your kids find out from him!" LOL--I LOVED THAT!

My kids are 6 and 8. I will never, ever tell them. I was told in a horrible fashion--representative of most of my childhood actually. I will allow my children to believe the magic as long as they would like.

k8t · 11-23-2009, 08:04 AM

Thighs Be Gone, that's wonderful! LOL

k8t · 11-23-2009, 08:06 AM

And I agree, let them keep the magic as long as possible. They'll ask when they want to know. I really think my oldest was just asking for permission to keep believing the first time she asked.

k8t · 11-23-2009, 08:06 AM

And for those of you with young children, you have to check out the NORAD santa site on Christmas Eve.

Leenie · 11-23-2009, 08:12 AM

My DD is 8 years old and she still believes. She asked me not long ago if there was such a thing as Santa. I said why do you ask? she said because some of the kids in school said there was no such thing. I said "well then, I guess they won't be getting anything from Santa this year will they...... If you don't believe you don't get." She said "Mama, I do believe."

To be continued next year ..............

lol