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He Didn't Text Back - Was It Down To Looks?

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Old 10-13-2009, 05:42 PM   #1
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Unhappy He Didn't Text Back - Was It Down To Looks?

I met a guy a week ago. We met on public transport and he left me a note with his number. After much deliberation I texted him, and we started a good conversation. Over the past week we've texted a lot, and he seems like a really decent guy. On top of all that, he said that when he saw me he felt an 'overwhelming attraction' to me and that he couldn't stop 'gawping' at me. This made me feel amazing, and we were discussing where and when to go for our first date when....

...he stopped texting. I know there are a million reasons why he might have stopped texting. Maybe he ran out of credit/battery. Maybe he got run over by a bus. Maybe he dropped his phone and lost my number. Maybe he just stopped having anything good to say and so didn't text back. Maybe he's playing hard to get.

But the only solution that seems realistic to me is that he internet stalked me, found my Facebook/MySpace, saw my picture, thought 'eww' and ceased contact with me. Because of my absolutely non-existent self-esteem, this seems like the likely story. And even though I barely knew him, it makes me feel really crap. I'm trying so hard to be attractive and be that superficial person that everyone thinks I should be. So to get that crucial ego boost and then have it taken away just feels awful. Could it be that superficial and that hurtful, or do I have too much free time to spend obsessing about whether he's not texting because I'm too fat and ugly?
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Old 10-13-2009, 05:59 PM   #2
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But he saw you to begin with and gawped at you! By the end of your post you're forgetting that part! So clearly he DOES find you atttractive. This should be a boost, not a downer!
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Old 10-13-2009, 06:05 PM   #3
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Aww, coming from someone that also suffers from low self esteem - I feel your pain! But let me just remind you, as marbear already mentioned ... he already has seen you in person!! And in person is much better than photos. So if he liked you then ... I highly doubt that has anything to do with it.

Have you ever heard the story about the guy that was walking down the street and saw a friend of his across the street ... and yelled hi ... but the friend just kept walking. So he goes home and he ponders and ponders about what happened? Did he do something to his friend that he didn't remember. Was the friend upset with him? Did he no longer want to be friends, etc etc. Then come to find out, the friend just honestly didn't even see/hear him say hello.

Have you texted him back since the last time? Maybe he didnt receive the last text. Maybe he's on the other end wondering why he hasn't heard from YOU. You know modern technology isn't all its cracked up to be ... there are glitches. So just send him another text ... tell him he just wanted to say hi ... and then see if he texts you back. And even if he did receive the last text ... and get a friendly little hello ( just keep it short and sweet ) and he was busy for some reason or something .. hopefully he'll text you back with an explanation.

Last edited by Smilette31 : 10-13-2009 at 06:06 PM.
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Old 10-13-2009, 06:11 PM   #4
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I agree with mar- he saw you on the bus so he already knew what you looked like.

How about one more text with? Hey haven't heard from you in a while, hope you are okay.
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Old 10-13-2009, 06:37 PM   #5
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I know I always say it but....maybe married or living with someone??
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Old 10-13-2009, 06:42 PM   #6
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I know I always say it but....maybe married or living with someone??
We're only in our early twenties so married is unlikely. I also did a little bit of internet stalking of my own, and he is single.

As for texting him...I don't want to come off too keen, or like I'm overthinking it too much. If it gets to a few more days and I still haven't heard from him, I'll send him a wee one, but if he's not interested there's no point in forcing it.

And also, I don't photograph well. So it's totally feasible that he thought I looked decent in real life, then saw pictures of me and went 'arrgh!'

Last edited by georgiad : 10-13-2009 at 06:59 PM.
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Old 10-13-2009, 06:54 PM   #7
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Be a little more aggressive... sometimes persistence pays off... Ya never know...he may not have gotten the text and I know plenty of people who only text in response to something... and dont think its because of your looks...he already saw you silly...its not like you met him online and only sent him headshots
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Old 10-14-2009, 02:11 AM   #8
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Yeah, I'd give it a few days (to not seem psycho or something) and then send a small text... if nothing then... well, the ball is in his court and you move on with your life until then!
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Old 10-14-2009, 07:21 PM   #9
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EDIT:

He texted. He'd been up north for a few days and had no signal in his phone. We're back talking, and he's just told me how beautiful it was up north. He gives me butterflies in my tummy.
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Old 10-14-2009, 08:06 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by georgiad View Post
EDIT:

He texted. He'd been up north for a few days and had no signal in his phone. We're back talking, and he's just told me how beautiful it was up north. He gives me butterflies in my tummy.
Yay!! See, you were worrying for nothing.
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Old 10-14-2009, 08:16 PM   #11
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I'm very happy for you
See? As I said, he should be a boost to your confidence!
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Old 10-14-2009, 08:48 PM   #12
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How exciting
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Old 10-14-2009, 09:08 PM   #13
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Quote:
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..... He gives me butterflies in my tummy.
Well I certainly hope they are fat free butterflies

I hope it turns into a magical relationship kiddo!
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Old 10-14-2009, 09:13 PM   #14
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Well I certainly hope they are fat free butterflies

I hope it turns into a magical relationship kiddo!
I want butterflies...I would even be willing to waste a few calories on them haha
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Old 10-14-2009, 09:17 PM   #15
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Quote:
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I want butterflies...I would even be willing to waste a few calories on them haha
Well since I have lived many years I can tell you those butterflies are....ALL they're carcked up to be

I pray you get them soon!
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