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Old 10-12-2009, 11:00 PM   #1
looking for onederland
ars's Avatar
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 334

S/C/G: 300/ticker/165

Height: 5'9"

Default Dating novice needs advice!

I work in a small office, and we regularly have various people in and out of the office doing deliveries and such. The other day, out of the blue, one of these young men really started chatting me up. It was almost too much information (kind of when you start nervously talking and can't stop), but suffice it to say in the span of a couple of minutes he managed to let me know that he was single and generally a good catch as far as life stability is concerned. My co-workers (both female) commented after that he was definitely flirting with me, and they thought it was quite funny and cute that he couldn't stop talking.

Now I am a total dating novice. I've had guy friends, but never dated anyone. I find it hard to believe anyone would be interested in me (though that is not to say that I am not an interesting person), and I really am not actively looking to date. However, I am sure this is in part due to the fact that I have never dated and have decided I'm happy enough to be single. I'm confident in day to day life except when it comes to dating.

That said, I've obviously been flustered since I ran to the back office to avoid contact the last time he came in. I realize now it was a silly thing to do, but I still cannot wrap my mind around someone actually being interested in me! One of my co-workers said it's up to me to make the next move, something which I know I won't do. Is there something else I can do (aside from normal professional niceties and weather chatting) to show him I'd be open to a date? As you can tell, I'm really quite shy when it comes to the opposite sex, so go easy on me your suggestions.

Weight loss journey started 12/28/2009 - Current Mini-goal:

Mini-goal #1 (300-270) reached 2/28/2010
Mini-goal #2 (270-250) reached 6/3/2010

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Old 10-12-2009, 11:17 PM   #2
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Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: California
Posts: 7,097

S/C/G: 197/135/?

Height: 5'7"


Guys don't generally need a lot of encouragement. They will often take just plain old friendly conversation as a sign that you're interested, instead of second-guessing themselves so much. So I'm not sure you need to do anything special. Just don't run away! Eye contact alone is pretty effective.
Started 4/14/08 LINK TO PROGRESS PICS 1/1/2009
"It is impossible to live pleasurably without living wisely, well, and justly, and it is impossible to live wisely, well, and justly without living pleasurably" Epicurus
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Old 10-13-2009, 09:37 AM   #3
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Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 172


As much as we girls would love to give you advice ... the best person to ask would be another guy haha. There are a few on the boards ... hopefully one of them will see this and give you their opinion.
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