ok so I am new to this site, but so far I really like it. It's supportive with my weight loss and I like that. So seeing as it is super reliable on the weigh category, I am hoping that it goes the same for boy problems.
Alright, so there is (was) this boy, and I actually really liked him, and that...well guy, told me that he liked me too. He even threw in an "I love you" so I thought, woah! This really nice, sweet, caring, goodlooking (oh was he ever goodlooking...6'3, tanned, blond hair, blue eyes, cute lips, with a lip ring to boot, great body (sorry...he was just really really hot)) guy is just totally into me.
I honestly did not understand why, I mean I have a tough personality to get along with. I'm passionate, strong minded, and short tempered. But he somehow managed to look past that, and thought that I was beautiful...said I was his angel.
So one particularly bad day for me, I said that I thought it was a good idea for us to not talk anymore, he can be really flaky, and self absorbed, but the jerk had a silver tongue and always made me not be mad at him. But we had gone 3 days without him trying to talk to me. I would call and text, and nothing. So I said that we shouldn't talk anymore, because he clearly didn't want to ( I know he wasn't busy because one of his friends is one of my friends, and he told me that Morgan (name of the guy) was doing nothing all day, everyday, AND THAT HE WAS TEXTING OTHER GIRLS). So Morgan, said that he was sorry and that he didn't want to stop what we had...yeah that was 3 days ago...2 days ago I text him and said that we hadn't talked all day. His reply was., well you said that you didn't want us to talk anymore, so we aren't going to. that TOTALLY threw me off, because we had talked the night before and everything was fine. so now its been 2 days and we havent talked...so much for him loving me, and now all I want to do is talk to him, just to freak out on him, because he lied, but I cant cause then I look like the jackass! anyways, I just need some good advice, or just people to synpathize with me, cause as everyone knows, misery loves company. anyways, thats it. Thanks for reading my pathetic story.
I was in a situation similar to this, we went back and forth for months with one of us telling the other we should stop talking it seems almost every week. We would go a day or two without talking but then would start talking again because we missed eachother, we really do get along and care about eachother. Finally it got to be too much and we decided to just be friends and everything has been great since, a much healthier relationship. Would that possibly work for you two, you know to have sometime to click just as friends?
See the thing is, that we were friends for 2 years before that, but now I am actually seeing what he's really like. I mean, how can you claim to love someone, and then just not talk to them like literally the night after you guys made up from a fight? He's crazy
I don't know, Alexis. It sounds to me like you feel out of control of your own life don't really believe guys will like you, so you distract yourself by playing games to make them like you or to convince yourself you don't want them anyway. I don't want to sound judgmental--it's not my point that what you're doing is "wrong," because it's totally normal and understandable. I've done that more times than I can count. But I know from experience that it's also self-defeating. It doesn't get you anyplace good. Instead, it leaves you feeling more and more out of control and worse and worse about yourself.
My advice would be to try to find ways to feel more in control and at home with yourself, and to forget about this guy as much as possible. He's bringing out self-destructive behavior and feelings, and that means that no matter how hot his tongue ring, he's no good for you.
Sometimes I think guys can just be jerks. I think that they don't know what they want. They always think that the grass is greener on the other side and they want what they can't have. The way I see it you are too good for him and he doesn't deserve you. I know this probably doesn't help you because you're probably hurting and maybe even down on yourself. But it is my opinion and you should never let a guy get you down...easier said than done, right?
I think it's pretty obvious he doesn't want to be serious. You just have to decide if you can live with that. It doesn't sound like it's working for you. I don't think he should be saying I love you if this is how he feels, but some people are like that.
Started 4/14/08 LINK TO PROGRESS PICS 1/1/2009
"It is impossible to live pleasurably without living wisely, well, and justly, and it is impossible to live wisely, well, and justly without living pleasurably" Epicurus
I have no advice, nor am I am ANY position to give any on this particular subject. I don't think people should say "i love you" to a person they KNOW really likes them, that's just mean (ah hem, speaking from personal experience). For me it's coming down to what I can handle for myself. If you can have him in your life JUST AS HE IS, flaws and all, and not expect anything more from him, then ok. The only person you can change is yourself, and only you know where your limits of someone's BS are... Good luck!!
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