[kaplods]

I'm not saying that it's an absolute that pretty b#'s will have tons of friends, no matter how they act. Nor that a fat girl will lose all of her friends if she's ever blunt. BUT, I am saying that in my experience, the threshold seems to be much more narrow for the fat girls. We're often cut less "slack" than pretty girls. I thought it was mostly my own paranoia, until in college and graduate school I studied perception and social behavior - and learned that research supports it - attractive people are seen as being nicer and more confident - they are given more benefit of the doubt, whereas an unattractive person has to prove him/herself and still may never be seen as being as competent as the attractive person.

It's not just fat - taller men get more and better promotions and make more money. Bald men get fewer promotions and make less money. Appearance matters. And no one is immune. No matter how unbiased you think you are, you make many of the same judgements that everyone else does. We instantly decide whether someone rubs us the wrong way, and it's on such an unconscious level we may never attribute it to the fact that the person doesn't "look right." Their eyes are too close together or too far apart, we may not even consciously be aware of it (we don't think hey that guys eyes are too small and too close together) we just know that they look weak or "dishonest."

I remember we had a professor who showed us slides of different people and we had to write down a personality trait that we thought the person seemed to have from their facial expression (later he pointed out that they all had the same facial expression eyes straight ahead and a slight closed mouth smile) - and one that struck home for me for some reason were the photos of people with weak chins (you know the people who seem to have a slanting chin or no chin at all). Just like everyone else I had written down negative personality traits. I don't know why the weak chin "stuck" so much in my mind, as the other traits were just as biased, but now whenever I see a person with a weak chin, it reminds me that my instincts regarding the person's personality could be based on their physical appearance.

[cbmare]

Wow. That was an interesting read, kaplods.

[Skinny4baby]

Actually, I was BLESSED with really good looks. Not trying to toot my own horn here...just trying to make a point. My nickname in high school was Brooks...as in Brooke Shields (same eyes, a little fuller lips, curlier hair but same color and thickness, more apple cheeked than her)...except I weighed 250 pounds at my high school graduation.

I view it more as worthiness. If you are FAT...and they are friends with you..They are doing you a FAVOR. So you owe them? You owe them your undivided attention, your free couseling sessions, your time, heck sometimes even your money. That is why, when you cross the line and be not so nice...they have the right to drop you...because after all..They were the ones doing you a favor allowing you to be worthy of their time and interest? It is very sad...but this is how I see alot of people being..especially WOMEN.