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Old 08-09-2007, 09:31 PM   #1
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Im so freakin mad, just mad at myself. A while ago I wrote a post that I liked someone. Well I juust found out that he lied to me. He has a long term girlfriend. WOW!!!

IS HE SERIOUS??? How could he make me feel this way. I feel used and dirty and just plain awful. How could I ever thought I would want to be with this guy. Now I just imagine his girlfriend, does she know what hes doing when shes not around. WTH!!!! And then he has the nerve to ask me when Im going to see him again. Im being used. Im just something on the side to him.

What do I do?? Do I let this girl know whats really going on? Do I just shut up and feel like a damn fool. Never again will I even talk to this guy.

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Old 08-09-2007, 10:11 PM   #2
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Write that jerk off and keep up the great work you have come a long way...don't let anyone or anything spoil that for you.
I personally would tell her...she probably won't believe you (they never do) but she should know what he is up to!
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Old 08-09-2007, 10:38 PM   #3
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As long as I live I will TESTIFY HIS LOVE!
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Old 08-09-2007, 10:46 PM   #4
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Yep, I would let her know.....it will at least put the seed in her mind about what a jerk he is
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Old 08-09-2007, 11:14 PM   #5
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I'm on the wrong side here -- I wouldn't tell her --- is she a close friend of yours? She probably will not believe you and it will only make you look bad -- you know he won't admit it. If she doesn't already know, she'll find out soon enough. I say put a "period" on the end of this one, walk away with a lesson learned and move on. Every bad experience makes you appreciate the great ones that much more!!

Good luck

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Old 08-10-2007, 12:14 AM   #6
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I'm not sure what I would do, sorry I can't be of help there. But I just want to give you a big . You deserve so much better, someone who will cherish and respect you!

Mini-goal 1: Reach 257lbs
Mini-goal 2: Reach 222lbs
Mini-goal 3: Reach 209lbs
Mini-goal 4: Reach 199!
Mini-goal 5: Reach 179 lbs (overweight BMI category!!)
Mini-goal 6: Reach 160lbs
Final goal: Reach 145lbs

Mini exercise goal 1: Begin running September 2012
Mini exercise goal 2: Celebrate graduation with a 5K
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Old 08-10-2007, 12:34 AM   #7
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Is this the same idiot who told you that you could be together if you lost weight? If so, I'm not sure why you're surprised.

Don't tell her unless you're actually friends, which I assume you're not. Worry about your choices, not hers.

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Old 08-10-2007, 01:10 AM   #8
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As to how you want to react (tell her or not), it's all about what you feel comfortable doing. Don't feel that you "have" to choose one way or another. You are a good person, and this situation is not your fault, so you have the right to react however you feel most comfortable reacting.

I'm so sorry this happened to you. I promise you that not all men are horrible scum like this guy...

Maintaining 148 lb since 2007. Shooting for 135 lb this time.
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Old 08-10-2007, 04:36 AM   #9
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Dont you hate it when guys hide things from you?

It really loosens my grip on the amount of security in my life because my heart was broken once before by someone. And it all started out with small lies and hiding things.
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Old 08-10-2007, 06:04 AM   #10
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ughh.. That's horrible. I am so sorry! I would inform the guy that you will never be seeing him again and inform him of how he's made you feel. Essentially guilt trip him. But he may not be sorry or show any remorse so be prepared for that. But don't back down. I would then inform the girlfriend as calmly as possible about the situation. But be prepared for her not to believe you or become rude towards you. That's all you can really do and word of mouth can do a lot too. Let all your friends know about what the guy's done too. But be matter of fact about it and calm otherwise you'll just be seen as a girl who's been tossed aside which is how I'm sure he will try to spin it to other girls in the future if you two happen to know any of the same people. Good luck and move on!
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Old 08-10-2007, 06:45 AM   #11
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URGHHH! Yes, i hate guys too. It's a shame that we sometimes pick the absolute scumbags of the earth, which make the good guys look bad and put us off even dating any of them!! I so know how you feel hun But don't be mad at yourself please, like, what have you done wrong? Except start liking someone you thought wasn't crazy in the head. And when you say you're never going to speak to him again, please stick to it! He doesn't deserve your friendship nevermind anything else! Leave him to it! awww big hug

BMI: 32.6 .................................................. ........BMI: 23
It's not whether you get knocked down, it's whether you get back up again

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Old 08-10-2007, 08:14 AM   #12
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That's crap. If I were you, I wouldn't tell the girl. That just causes drama.

How did you find out that he lied to you?
Fit and fabulous forbids one from feeling frumpy!
*Maintaining my weight loss (give or take; this IS a constant journey) from October '07 onward * I could not have done it without all the support from the lovely ladies (AND gentlemen) on this site!

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Old 08-10-2007, 08:21 AM   #13
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Shes my friends brother, and she doesnt know that this happened again. I was talking to her on the phone and someone called her other line. She told me it was her brothers girlfriend. Then I tryed to play it off, and started to ask questions, and she sayed that they've been toghether for a while. I dont know who this girl is but Ill probaly run into her if she goes over to his house. Im always there. Hes barely there but Im sure she goes over there.

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Old 08-10-2007, 08:25 AM   #14
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I agree with not telling the girlfriend. Just walk away and never look back. I was in your shoes many times in my 20's and it really and truly stinks to have to go through that. Just be more careful next time and take heart that someday you'll be in your 40's, married with children and happy as a clam and this will all seem like a distant memory. I hated dating for the exact reason of feeling how you're feeling right now.
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Old 08-10-2007, 09:36 AM   #15
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You could tell her but I don't think she will believe you.. even if she suspects something. I knew my sister's boyfriend was cheating on her. My other sister and I, even my brother, tried to tell her he was wrong for her and what we thought. She just avoided us for a while. Deep down she knew it too but wasn't ready to admit it. She did break up with him but started semi- seeing him again about a year later. Only later did she find out that he was seriously dating the girl who he had originally cheated on her with.
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