NicoleNYC -- I feel the same. Like I've wasted so much time being overweight and after two kids will never get back where I was. But you know what, thin people age too -- their boobs sag, there butts droop, etc. So, I've decided even when I reach my goal, if I have to tuck my extra skin behind my back, I don't care as long as I look good dressed up and feel good and healthy!!
I was overweight for as long as I can remember until I was about 19 or so. Lost 40 lbs around that time and was thin and then met my husband when I was 23 and proceeded to gain 100 lbs. But to be honest, I was the same as a lot of us -- even when I was thin I didn't enjoy it. I don't think I've ever had the self esteem necessary to enjoy my appearance. I personally don't think it matters if you have always been overweight or had a period of thin -- it's not the weight that hurts us, it's our opinion of ourselves, our self doubts and our visions of the world around us.
I agree with Jillybean, that it depends a lot upon the individual and their attitude and experience.
But I would venture that one of the toughest times to be overweight would have to be the middle school and high school years. Kids can be really mean, and the whole social hierarchy thing is ruthlessly based on a lot of superficial things, like weight. And the pressure to conform at that age is very intense. So from that perspective, I think someone who has always been overweight (vs someone who has, say, post-pregnancy weight) might have had a tougher go, since they were overweight during a more difficult phase of life.
In a way, someone who became overweight later in life may have it a little easier, because in a way, its almost expected. Ran in to a few old friends at a funeral home a few weeks ago, and one guy (a nice guy, despite the insensitive remark, who I haven't seen in YEARS) joked "Wow, you guys all look great - I was expecting a lot of really big women." I don't think he meant to be offensive, but it's just that after a certain age, there's a little more acceptance that a certain percentage of the population is going to put on weight.
i know my answer for sure.
to have once been thin, and then gain.
i was a fat kid, then i lost the baby fat, and was thin, and proportional. plus i did what every teenage girl does: take pictures of themselves day and night.
once i gained 30lbs, i go back and look at my old albums, its painful to see how thin and beautiful i was, compared to the albums of me gradually getting bigger, my skin getting worse.
because i am not obese, and i'm 17, vanity CAN sometimes be a bigger motivator than health.
I can't say which would be harder. I was always thin and athletic growing up. I never had a weight problem until I became more sedentary. As I got older and had my children and gained a lot of weight, I longed to be thin again. It definitely hurt to see the old pic's of myself and be reminded of how I let myself go. (Plus, constant reminder from family and acquaintances). Like many others have mentioned, I didn't feel thin enough even when I was. Now that I've reached my goal and hovered within 5 lbs. of that goal, I finally feel like I'm thin enough. But, as a teenager, this current weight wouldn't have been "good enough" for me.
I don't think you can say "better" or "worse" for either situation.
I too am of the "it's an individual thing" camp.
I have been on both sides, though only really appreciated a "normal" comfortable weight for myself once in my life. When I was younger I thought I was fat and horribly disgusting; in actuality, I was a normal weight for my age/height/activity level.
I gained weight in adulthood. I lost weight. I gained weight. I've done the self-loathing thing. I've let old "skinny" pictures of myself motivate me into action.
For me, right now, I think it's a GOOD thing that a couple of years ago I lost and maintained a normal, comfortable weight for myself. While I am still shocked sometimes to see photos of myself, most of the time when I visualise how I look, I am STILL at that normal comfortable weight.
You can use either way to motivate you, or, to be negative and self-loathing. We can spend all of our time beating ourselves up and feeling guilty for "letting ourselves go" but what is the point? All that matters, really, is RIGHT NOW and what you do RIGHT NOW to get where you want to be. Energy spent being negative, guilty, whatever, is only going to be wasted energy.
Depends on your definition of "thin". I have never been thin if you are talking under 135. Even at 135 people said I was fat, or bigger than them. I didn't gain weight until after having children and I wasn't real big still. I lost a lot of the weight due to the loss of a spouse. And kept it off for years. Then another loss years later...the loss of a baby and this time turned to food. I feel big now but not so big that if I stayed this weight the rest of my life it would bother me. I know I will never get down to 135 again. But to reach my goal of 155'ish/160 would be awesome.
I look at my "thin" pictures every single day, and have some of them posted around my kitchen and living room, just to remind me what I'm working towards, but I will never be 115-120 again, but I would be so happy with 140-150. It's amazing how when I was at 120, I still felt like I had a pouch for my stomach and always thinking "what if" I could just lose a few more pounds. I look at my younger daughter who is also 5' 4" and 145 pounds and she looks "perfect" and I would love to look like her. Having been thin and now heavy for the last 20 years, it's amazing how your mind set does change and how even 150 looks so good. I never exercised when I was thin and even though I will weigh more when I finally reach my goal, I may be able to fit into some smaller clothes again because of all the exercising I'm doing, time will definitely tell and I can hardly wait!!!
