[Jen415]

Hi y'all...I'm headed back to a "reunion" of sorts this coming weekend. This will be the first time that most of these folks will meet my "boyfriend". I'm looking for a better way to introduce him other than saying "This is my boyfriend." (I think I'm a little too old to have a boyfriend, but he's not my fiance (yet), but he's more than a casual aquaintance. In other words, we are in a long term relationship.)

So...I'm open to ideas....

[phantastica]

The best I've heard is to refer to him as your partner. "Boyfriend" does sound kind of juvenile, and "significant other" is simply a mouthful. "Partner" is gender neutral and isn't dependent upon a marriage certificate.

In these parts, 'partner' has often been misinterpreted as a homosexual term, but that shouldn't matter because he will be with you.

[GreatBigMonsterMomma]

How about by just using his name? That's how I usually introduce my husband. (And no, people do not always assume that is the relationship.)

Or you could always use paramour, which has a certain...je ne sais quoi.

[techwife]

Jen: How old are you? I know boyfriend sounds kind of juvenile, but it also has a sort of fun valley girl thing to it that may instill a bit of jealousy to the long-time-marrieds. You could chew a big wad of gum, do your best Moon Unit impression and say, "This is my boyfriend..." with a toss of your hair...or you could use Sabra's option and just use his first name. Although the valley girl impression may instill said boyfriend to promote himself to fiance if you say things like "Grody" or "Gag me" while you talk to people. Just a suggestion.

I vote for just using his first name. Partner would have people wondering if he's had a sex change as that's what I equate to a gay couple. Significant other makes me think this is a couple that is boycotting marriage in lieu of a freestyle commitment. You might also consider roommate, main squeeze or lover...all which conjure up conflicting images.

I'd just go with his first name while holding his hand...if peopel want to know details, they'll ask.

[Glory87]

Originally Posted by Jen415

Hi y'all...I'm headed back to a "reunion" of sorts this coming weekend. This will be the first time that most of these folks will meet my "boyfriend". I'm looking for a better way to introduce him other than saying "This is my boyfriend." (I think I'm a little too old to have a boyfriend, but he's not my fiance (yet), but he's more than a casual aquaintance. In other words, we are in a long term relationship.)

Ha, in an earlier post you used "SO" so carefully I thought you meant a lesbian relationship! How about just introducing him by his name and dispense with all the titles? How about "I'd like you to meet Dave (or Stan or whatever), we've been together for 4 years."

[Jen415]

Sounds like just using his name is the way to go! Besides, most folks will figure out we are more than friends when they catch us making out in the hotel elevator! LOL

Techwife: I'm 41....smack in the middle of being middle aged! I remember Goldie Hawn calling herself Kurt Russell's "girlfriend" because it sounds really young and sexy!

Glory: Someone else thought I might have been a lesbian too! Only those who watch carefully and read my posts know!

Phan: I've referred to him as my partner in the past--I may end up reverting back to that.

[techwife]

Jen: I'm 41, also! And the Goldie Hawn theory is exactly what I was going for. Nothing wrong with your situation having a youthful air to it. And I've been known to make out with my boyfriend..I MEAN HUSBAND... on the elevator, too. Just not when the kids are with us...I get the evil eye from my daughter.

[almostheaven]

41 is middled-aged?!?!?! Did you have to tell me that?

I see nothing wrong with having a boyfriend at 41...at any age for that matter. But my 86 yo former neighbor called her boyfriend her "companion". Something new and different.

[AmberD]

One of my professor's in college was forever referring to his 'partner'. I just assumed that he was gay. It wasn't until the very end of the semester that he threw a 'she' in there.

Turns out he'd been living with this woman for over 5 years and was having the same problem as you, he thought 'girl friend' to juvenile, so for lack of a better descriptor, he called her is partner. It confused my poor conclusion jumping brain.

Long story short: I think first name is the way to go.

[EZMONEY]

HEY JEN I GO WITH INTRODUCING BY HIS NAME, FOR ME "PARTNER" IF IT IS NOT IN A WORK OR BUSINESS SITUATION MEANS GAY THESE DAYS. I WAS 40 YEARS OLD WHEN ANGIE AND I STARTED DATING 11 YEARS AGO, SHE ALWAYS INTRODUCED ME AS GARY, I WAS NEVER OFFENDED. I SUPPOSE MOST PEOPLE FIGURED OUT WE WERE A COUPLE PRETTY QUICKLY YEP, SHE ALWAYS INTRODUCED ME AS JUST GARY, BUT THEN AGAIN MAYBE I WASN'T SIGNIFICANT

[NewDay4MeToo]

I think just keep it casual and fun.
You could say
"This is my guy, ____"
"This is my man, ____"

Say it with a smile and a look at him and that will be all the explanation that is needed.

[midwife]

I use partner all the time. I also never assume relationships (marriage, dating). Never assume the 18 year old guy standing next to the 18 year old girl in labor is her boyfriend. He could be, or he could be her brother, friend, step-father, father of her baby, or any combination of said relationships. But I digress from the topic.

Partner is easy and using it rarely causes confusion or chaos from my perspective. I don't think it implies gender. But it is also generic. These people will get to know your sweetie on a personal level. I think by stating his name, your actions and his will clarify the relationship.

[teahoney]

I agree with just going with the first name although the valley girl impression suggested by techwife has piqued my interest. lol

[Wolfena]

I say just introduce him by name.... if you feel the need to call him something else "partner" sounds pretty good.

[Jen415]

Well gang, the reunion was last weekend. I ended up calling him boyfriend for the most part. Turned out to be no big deal either way.....