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this summer is going to be so difficult with my mom

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Old 05-28-2006, 12:33 PM   #1
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Default this summer is going to be so difficult with my mom

She knows Im trying to mantain my size and she went to the store and bought this

WHOLE milk
Ribs
Chicken Drumstick
hamburgers
hotdogs
white hamburger buns and hotdogs (not even whole grain!)
Juice and soda
Life cereal
Bacon
Eggs
watermelon

there is absolutely nothing to eat that is healthy except cereal and watermelon! I managed to make myself a bowl of cereal and use the whole milk because I had no other choice
this was soo much easier at school where I could eat a healthy made breakfast and a salad or sandwhich for lunch then at home I would work out and eat a small snack but now I have to eat all my meals at home and not even the cereal is healthy with whole milk! Maybe water will have to be my next choice. I have two choices

1) eat what we have and gain all my weight back
2) starve to death on watermelon and cereal!

helllppp

NOW we are about to have a barbeeque and she's going to kill me if I dont touch any of the food but i dont know what to do
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Old 05-28-2006, 12:54 PM   #2
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I know how hard that can be. I was smaller until I went home to my moms. I ended up telling her that I just couldn't stay there any longer unless she could keep some healthier foods in the house. She wanted my sons there so much that she kept some healthier foods at home. I think the best thing in a situation is to sit down and have a conversation with your mom.....an open, truthful conversation. No yelling......no crying......just open up to her and tell her your fears. I'm sure she'll understand.
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Old 05-28-2006, 01:30 PM   #3
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I know how that is. My parents will go to the store and buy all those things plus some, knowing I am trying to lose weight. They live out of state, so at least I do not have to deal with it all summer long, just during visits. I try my best to put all the unhealthy stuff on the top shelf (out of my reach) and I use the phrase "that's really not what I have a taste for" a lot.

Good luck.
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Old 05-28-2006, 01:34 PM   #4
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I agree with mommieof2. Try to have a calm talk with your mom and maybe ask if she could put certain items on her shopping list that fit in with your plan. Play it low-key and don't act the martyr, just do your thing - nobody can force feed you foods you don't want to eat!!

In the meantime, you could just eat the healthier things at the bbq. Don't make a big deal about it in order to make your mom feel bad - she'll just get her feelings hurt and won't want to co-operate with you. You can have some chicken - just take off the skin and have just one or two chicken legs. If you have a hamburger, try it without a bun or with half a bun and plenty of fixings like lettuce, tomato and onion. If your mom didn't buy these kind of toppings maybe you could volunteer to go the store and get them - they're not very expensive. Eggs are a healthy food, you can make an omelet or scrambled eggs with two egg whites and one yolk (87 calories) - good for you and lots of protein which is very filling. You can even have one slice of well-cooked bacon (so that most of the fat is cooked off) with it for 43 calories.

If your mom won't buy lowfat or nonfat milk, try using less milk on your cereal. Be sure to measure the cereal serving, though, as most cereals are very high in calories (you probably know these things, as you say you've lost weight and are trying to maintain).

Instead of soda, you could just get yourself a nice tall glass of iced water or make yourself some iced tea - it's easy to do!

Congratulations for trying to stay on track even when you don't see eye-to-eye with you mom about food.
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Last edited by penpal : 05-28-2006 at 04:31 PM.
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Old 05-28-2006, 01:46 PM   #5
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Actually, barring the whole milk (I buy 1%), all of those items make their way onto my shopping list on at least a semi-regular basis. As long as you prepare everything as healthfully as possible, watch your portion size, and supplement with lots of healthier choices (I'm assuming that isn't all that's in the house?), you should be fine.

Just remember that you are ultimately in charge of what goes into your body, and at what quantities. I'm sure that your mother is thinking only of making food with the aim of making you happy. Emphasize to her that healthier eating is what makes you happy now. However, be ready to make an effort in the kitchen- either making your own meals or making dishes for the family. Don't expect her to change the way she has been cooking for decades to coincide with your new lifestyle, and remember that it is better to lead by quite example then to try to force change in others.

Just my two cents.
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Old 05-28-2006, 02:47 PM   #6
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Hey Sweetlovin'

I know how discouraging it can seem when someone unintentionally seems to be sabotaging your healthy eating habits. But don't despair yet! There is some good in those foods, too. I read the book "The Fat Fallacy" last summer, and it basically covered the french paradox. I learned that fat isn't necessarily the enemy - if you eat it in small portions - and it keeps you full for a longer time. So have that whole milk in your cereal (portioned) until you can get back to your regular routine, or until you can ask your mom to buy other products. You may even find you prefer higher fat milk with less of it. I enjoy the lengthened time I stay full with regular product foods (not lower fat) but my sister wouldn't hear of it and refused to drink it, so we're back to skim, and I'm fine either way.

At the bbq, pick one meat you would like to have, be it a hamburger or a couple pieces of chicken, and fill up the rest of your plate with veggies (whether cut up with dip or salad etc.) You will be fine!

Good luck hun
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Old 05-28-2006, 03:34 PM   #7
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It's tough to make changes in eating when you aren't in control of the family shopping. How about suggesting to your mother that you will take care of one meal a week. You could do the planning.. go shopping with her and pick out what you need.. you could cook with or without assistance depending upon your family,...
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Old 05-28-2006, 04:46 PM   #8
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Thanks everyone for the support. It really helped!

penpal- Im going to talk to my mom tonight and tell her I'm just NOT going to go back to eating the way I use to and I'm sorry if it might hurt her feelings. I know she puts alot of work into all of the food but it's not the taste, it's just not going to fit into my eating habits.

also good news! She went to the store and bought lettuce and macaroni. She's making salad and macaroni salad.

salad, macaroni salad, and two peices of chicken? sounds good to me and watermelon for desert while everyone else eats ben and jerrys. oh when will they learn

I'm also going to make a shopping list and buy a few things of my own. I can spare 5 extra bucks and all I really need is skim milk, fruit, and veggies, maybe some ham/turkey too. We have good sliced bread already.
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Old 06-01-2006, 01:08 PM   #9
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I feel your pain. I buy my own food.

~jess~
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Old 06-03-2006, 07:12 PM   #10
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I'm glad to hear things are going better. Maybe if you ask your mom for a weekly bugedet for food that's just yours, you can makesure that you always have a leaner source of nutrients from each food group.
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Old 06-06-2006, 02:02 PM   #11
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My mother does that also when she knows that we are coming to visit. I started stoping at the store on the way to her house and picking up tons of healthy stuff, fresh fruits and veggies, low fat meats and cheeses, whole grains breads and cereals. Now she waits until we get there before she goes shopping.

Of course, if you are still living at home with your parents with no income of your own then you have a different problem.

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