I recently joined the Catholic church in my neighborhood, went through the RCIA process and was baptized and confirmed this past Easter.
I usually go to mass by myself. A month or so ago, a guy sat next to me and started talking to me. At first I tried to be friendly. Then I started to feel uncomfortable when he kept being obviously persistent by coming to sit next to me at more masses. My boyfriend came with me a few times, then I tried basically ignoring him. I went to different masses. Apparently he is incapable of getting the message, and again today after mass started he came and sat next to me. I got up and moved, but was so weirded out that I left.
I've never had something like this happen before and I'm not sure how to handle it. He's loco in the cabeza and is really starting to upset me. I love my parish and church. Not sure what to do.
Follow your gut. Something is telling you that this guy is bad news. Politely but firmly tell him that you are in a relationship and not interested in another. And then continue to sit elsewhere, even if that means you have to move every time you go to church.
Also, have you considered talking to the priest? He might be able to offer some insights on the guy's behavior or just keep an eye out for you a little.
yes, I think I might talk to the nun who headed the RCIA. He's from another congregation in the neibhorhood (he told me). I said to him clearly when my bf came with me, "This is my boyfriend." Whatever this guy wants or is in his mind, he's creeping me out.
I was going to suggest talking to the priest, also. I don't think you should ignore this. Always take your boyfriend with you or ask some of the other parishioners if you can sit with them.
Dragonwoman64, I did have a man bothering my Grandchildren one time at a church and I went to a member of the church and she went to the Preacher. It stopped. Someone who goes to church in the Catholic Church would know more about this than me, who to go to talk too.
Go to the priest, he will sort it out.
Do you know any of the other women yet? As in well enough to say, can I sit with you? Woman power is great too.
We had a man bothering young women with children. (Might have been innocent but he needed to know it was inappropriate.)
I am the preacher.
Next time I saw our police community support officer I mentioned him.
Next time I saw him, our police community support officer happened to be there.
I told him, kindly but firmly, that the young women had been upset by him.
It stopped.
We all feel bad or, in my case, I feel bad that I don't feel bad, sometimes if we are bothered by behaviour that might (conceivably) be innocent and we have to take action. Bottom line, you have to feel safe, and your safety is more important than worrying about Another's feelings in the matter.
thanks all! I will talk to the nun and priest. I think it's true, if he lost interest in doing it to me he might do it to someone else, someone less capable than me of handling it.
I just never really had to deal with something like this before, and am trying to be extra sensitive since it's church.
I have an Aunt Bootsie (her real name is Lois). it's funny, when I logged in my eating at fitday reports showed me I was low in vitamin D, and then when I had the blood tests done by the doctor, those results confirmed it. I take cod liver oil pills now (the vitamin D supplements upset my stomach) and eat more fish. That's a good program to stay on track calorie wise and nutrition wise.
....I just never really had to deal with something like this before, and am trying to be extra sensitive since it's church.
D-W Don't you dare be extra sensitive because it is church! You get to the nun and or priests...elders...and let them know immediately. You have done the normal things to allow the guy to know, in a sensitive way, that you are not interested. We have had a few "whack" jobs in our church...we too are careful to show Christian love and yet...NOT BE STUPID...and protect our families. I love the idea of other women/friends sitting with you at all times.
Dragonwoman I have the CD , they must have updated the program will have to go on line and find out.For I don't know how the program knew you were low on vitamin D? But that is good it did!
OT -- getting bothered at church
D-W 