Let me first start off by saying that I have not actually *run* since...oh, gym class in grade school, I'd say. But I have no problem admitting that I want to be "a runner" soooo badly. A friend of mine recently completed her first half-marathon (after only running for about a year) and she has inspired me so much. Honestly? It may be laughable, but my dream is to celebrate my 35th birthday (in two years) by running the Halifax Bluenose Marathon.
But there's one problem: I seem to have a sort of mental block when it comes to actually....running. I'll be on the treadmill at the gym, and I'll be *walking* at a 5.0 mph pace, and I'll be thinking, "At this speed, I could totally start at least jogging"....but I don't. And as much as I hate to admit it (because who likes to admit that they care what others think?) it's mostly because I figure I'll look stupid running since I'll have to start off incredibly slowly.
It drives me mad, because while I'm at the gym driving myself nuts with the whole "I want to run/I can't run" argument, there'll be someone on the treadmill next to mine, running, and half the time it's someone who's a fair bit heavier than me, and all I'm thinking is, "See, they look good running!" even though, hey, when they started out they probably felt the same way I do.
I just don't know how to get over this stupidity. I really, really want to run. Am I doomed to just...never be able to run? Am I the only one who feels this way? I don't want to feel like this, and I'd love to hear your input on how I could possibly overcome this crap.