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Old 12-01-2011, 07:47 AM   #1
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Default *** December *** Chat

Starting us up for a new month. This month will be full of temptations so for us all.

ETA: FBGL a nice 4.2 this morning but my ticker is still lying as I'm just under 180. I am determined to get firmly into the mid-170s this month and keep that BGL in a good range.
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Old 12-01-2011, 09:25 AM   #2
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Happy December to you all. Hope it is a great month for us all!!
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Old 12-01-2011, 09:39 AM   #3
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Thanks Ruthie for the December thread. Good morning everyone. I can't believe we are finally in December. I agaree that this is a trying month for everyone. I believe this WW/LC/IE combo is going to not only work for me, but it will help me get through those tempting times. As of this morning, when I get this next 2 lbs off that my ticker will be accurate again. I now have the scales moving downward again. FBS still bounces, but I believe if I get the weight down that it will eventually line up.

DD came in to talk with us last night. Tony and I had a chance to be alone yesterday so I had told him things I had said and things they had said to me. We realized that they didn't have to move here and I told him I wasn't sure why they did. Tony has a Master's Degree in music and he did not stay in that field. He later took correspondence courses to become a Resperatory Therapist which he absolutely loved working in Neo-Natal. It was his calling in life. He felt that he wasted all those years in college and of course we see lots of kids graduate and can't find jobs in their field. He didn't push for his son and daughter to go to college. His deceased wife didn't go and they both made pretty good money. His kids feel cheated because they didn't get to go to college because Tony couldn't send them. She had an extremely good job working 4 days a week and the company he works for actually called her husband to go to work in FL, but he told them they were moving here and he got the job here. So we suddenly realized that she actually manipulated her hubby, kids, ex and us to get to move in up here so she could go to nursing school. She created this situation. Of course, we will never voice that too her. However we did take the opportunity to make some things very clear and exactly how we feel and what we can and cannot do. I also made it clear what I do not like and what I will and will not allow when it comes to respect especially when it comes to her Daddy. However, I'm not sure she even knows what respect is. I love her dearly, however, she is just like any other daughter and she will have to learn the hard way that Daddy and Mama do know what they are talking about. I told DH that he needs to quit telling them some things and let them find out on their own because some things we say are like talking to the wind. I did make it clear that I am the one who writes the checks and I am the one who knows how much money I have to work with... every month "I am the one who has to be able to pay the bills and I do pay them before anything else is done" and I get cranky until I get them out of the way. I told her that I'm sorry but they will have to learn to live with it, because every month I go through this thing wondering if I'm going to be able to cover it all. I can't tell you that it is any better, but it sure as heck felt good to say what I wanted to say. I think DH felt better too. One thing I have made clear is that her Daddy IS sick and they need to be thankful for him because if it wasn't for him we would have nothing. I know she thinks we have money. He told her that it was because he had the right banker that took his 401K years ago and put it into an account that is paid by the stock market and we lived great for a while because of it, but that since the economy has gone like it has in the past year of so, we don't have much of it more. I told her "We have lost half of what was in there just this year because of the stock market dropping like it has". Don't know what she believes because her mother always lied to her about how bad things were telling her that "it's not as bad as your Daddy says". She doesn't know that her mother would spend on credit cards and get them messed up and Tony would have to take over and get them out of messes. According to what his Mother told me before she dies, some times even had to go to his Mother to get things straightened out. And of course, that isn't mine to tell her. But she tells her son all the time, "Daddy always says these thing. He has said these things all my life. It's not that bad". Well it was and it is and... Hey were living in the 2011 world where things are bad globally and things are really scarry even here in the USA. And even if it wasn't, you still have to be responsible and pay your bills.

Bonnie We may be just going through the adjustment period in our home and I hope that is all it is. My hope is that we will adjust and things will get better. I'm also thinking that a lot of "our" problems may be a little 8 year old girl who says is working between people, manipulating to get things the way she wants it. I see her doing this with her parents all the time. If you have lived with your hubby's aunt before and it worked, then it could definitely be a really good thing for y'all and her. I know that the last 2 or 3 yrs that my previous hubby lived, out daughter moved back in with us. I will always be grateful for that time we all had together. She had moved in and out for years and it was always a nightmare. But the last time she moved in the only problems we had was the normal problems you have with teens because of her daughter, but our last 3 yrs together with her Daddy was absolutely great. He died knowing that his little girl was okay. So I know it can work. Times are tough and I believe that this is a time when families need to pull together and work together. So I hope this works out good for you, your aunt and everyone involved.

As for the rest of us going through these things, regardless of how it is going, I try to keep reminding myself of the old saying "This too shall pass".

Sorry this is so long so won't do indies. I have a baby who needs a diaper change and to eat so he can give me another stinky later. LOL

Have a great day everyone.
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Old 12-01-2011, 12:13 PM   #4
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hi everyone... me and the hubby talked last night we addec up a little of what it would cost to turn the garage into a apt and i can say i am not comfortable with it. so i explained to hubby i never would of wanted to do that i was only suggesting we could help her for six months to help each other out . i jest need to find a cheaper place to live. one where they will have a better school for my dd . so we are going to talk to her this weekend and see if+we+can+work+something+out.+other+then+that+doin g+good+i+need+to+get+back+to+working+out+been+putt ing+it+off+lately.
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Old 12-01-2011, 12:31 PM   #5
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Hello All!

fbs at 81 this morning. I was a little too carby yesterday despite being under calories but my bs was unfazed so it is ok. I did 90 minutes of walkitout this morning and enjoyed my usual breakfast. I have an appointment with the oral surgeon today to start the process to get two tooth implants before the end of the year. I am such a phobic about the dentist that I am prescribed sedatives so I can go - Actual panic attacks weird! I plan to put up the christmas tree and decorations later with dgs.

Trish, I am proud of you for speaking up and making boundaries clear. Whether or not they ever believe you about your situation, what you TELL them is what is important. Again, the only advice I can give is to speak up - on the spot - when things are happening and not let them fester. You should not be the one stressed out - they should. It is still hard. BTW, your dh did not owe them a college education! Most people work, attend school, and (often - like me) function as parents at the same time.

Bonnie, whatever decision you make will be the right one. I was glad to see that you had posted this morning. I was hoping that you could get on here with your phone Hopefully you will find a new place to live that will be easier on your budget and dd. Yup, try to get back to at least a little excercise - so good for your stress and your body I have set my walkitout so the slower songs start first and then keep getting faster and faster until the end. It is really fun and I sure get endorphins that way.

Ruth, thanks for the new thread. I can't believe that it is December. I MUST get my shopping in order! My plan for the month is to excercise moderation during special occasions and to stay strictly on plan the other days of this month. I believe strongly that I can learn to enjoy special foods and special occasions without getting out of control! Anyone else have a strategy?

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Old 12-01-2011, 12:47 PM   #6
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Bonnie - I think you are wise to know how you feel about things and I hope you will know in your heart what to do. I probably sound terrible when I rant and I know a lot of my attitude is wrong, because it isn't really what I want in my heart. I love my step-daughter and I want to help her and her family improve things for them. I honestly believe that is what we are supposed to do as parents when we can. I told her if this had happened 2 years ago it would have been easier, but it didn't. It actually takes compromise on all concerned. We made the mistake of never sitting down and having the family meeting that we had planned to make known what was expected. It seems like you have that covered. Just be sure you get the "important" things taken care of in advance and you won't go through what we are. I actually believe that in time this situation will calm down and be okay. I also believe since you have done this before with your aunt and it worked that it would work again if you so choose to do it. I know y'all seem to go and help her a lot already when you can and I'm sure it would much easier if you either lived there or at least closer to her and I also believe good schools are important for your children as well. I DH and I knew this was going to be difficult when we agreed to it. After all, it has been just DH and me for 5 yrs and we could go and do as we pleased no one else was involved. I am also just as sure that I have to have an "attitude adjustment" myself, because I'm not stupid as to think that everything is their fault either... I know my faults as well. So just as dieting... it is a process to get things right. So please don't let my situation keep you from doing anything you think will be beneficial to all concerned. I think one of my problems too (I think Rie understands this one), I don't feel I get to play Grandmother because I'm having to be more like Mom to the children as well. You don't have that problem. I'll be praying for situation as I pray for mine. Believe me I don't pray for God to move the kids out of my house, because I do believe we are supposed to do this. Instead, I pray for Him to help us make it work and cause our relationships to be much stronger and better.
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Old 12-02-2011, 05:09 AM   #7
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Insomnia strikes! I've been doing well sleeping lately but have been awake since 3 and up since 4. I was worried that my FBGL was really low but tested OK at 4.5.

On with the day! Am thinking of a breakfast of ww couscous, pomegranate seeds and some agave - am I nuts? I'm planning to make broccoli soup for lunch but that may end up for dinner as I will be in town shopping later - and avoided the dreaded Chinese Buffet!
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Old 12-02-2011, 08:01 AM   #8
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Ruthie Sorry about the insomnia. I was the opposite this morning as I wanted to sleep, but of course duty calls (alarm clock went off).LOL

Busy day today to get ready for the weekend. So will make this a quick one. Hope everyone has a great Friday.
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Old 12-02-2011, 05:26 PM   #9
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Hello All!

fbs at 79 this morning. Sorry that I am so late getting here today. It has been a busy and stressfull time since last night. My dad has some health problems relating to very severe sleep apnea and I am not sure how things will work out. I didn't sleep well last night.

I got up early and then did more than 2 hours of walkitout plus a little weight lifting. I went to the health food store and went with ds to get some new filters and stuff for the aquarium because it was bugging me! LOL I am heading down to my moms after a while to help her get set up to start working out a little on her wii. Maybe dad's health problems will have a positive outcome, after all.

Trish, I understand exactly what you mean about losing some of the fun of being grandma. You can't really spoil them when they live with you. I tell myself that my dgs will have a special relationship with me because he knows me so well. It all works out in the end....

Bonnie, I have "watched" you deal with many problems since you have been on this site and I absolutely know that you will make the best decisions for you and your family. In a weird way, after we get the diabetes diagnosis, some of us get stronger. You are one of those people.

Ruth, good luck on your shopping. I have managed to get most of mine done in the last day or so by going online. Yay! A couple more and all I have to do is wait for the UPS man. I like to do elaborate gift wrapping so I try to do it all in one effort. I really enjoy it. I will actually go to a store soon to get more ribbon, etc. I bought all my paper last year after christmas.
Have a great day!

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Old 12-02-2011, 07:29 PM   #10
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quick hello to everyone. Trish, I feel for you, but don't know how to keep qrown kids from feeling so "entitled." I think my own younger one feels too entitled as well, and we have done our best to make her work for what she has. She seems to be doing better since leaving home and managing on a budget. Thats what happened with the older one who is now good with money and doesn't rely on us. She was very happy when we outlined what we were willing to help with financially for her wedding, and grateful.
Bonnie, hope you find a decent place that is that special combination of affordable and appropriate to your needs. Converting a garage to apartment does sound expensive.

I seem to be down a pound today, inspite of the fact I gave into a carb craving yesterday and had some corn chips with cheese on them. Hives are definitely better with the singulair. Ruth, I am sleeping really well lately, the meds for the hives (atarax) makes me sleepy and I am sleeping well at night, I still wake to go to the bathroom at least once most nights, but can get back to sleep fairly well usually.
a big hello to everyone, have a great weekend.
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Old 12-02-2011, 07:35 PM   #11
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Hi Everyone so Internet is Back on the hubby couldn't take it no more had to have it back as soon as he got the money. Will be back tomorrow to read all the post from the last few days...
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Old 12-03-2011, 07:02 AM   #12
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Good morning. Weight still stuck and FBL 5.2 this morning. No idea why the higher reading - maybe having two slices of bread with dinner last night? On the other hand, maybe my bad girl body is thinking of the Ferraro Rocher and Laura Secord chocolates that are waiting to be wrapped. (This will be the first Christmas I've not succumbed and had to go out and buy new ones for gifting!)

Hold your families close despite all the turmoil you are going through. My DD ran away from home when she was 15 which left a huge hole in my heart - and in hers. She and I are fine now but it took twenty years. She's 46 now. Just sayin' from the advanced age of 72.

On with today. Big challenge today will be doing washroom control duty from 4 to 7 at the Mill tonight, We will be swamped with visitors here to tour, see the light displays in the Park and visit Santa. Our facility must be open and people use it for pit stops and to keep out of the cold while they wait for the next wagon down to the park. We also serve them hot chocolate while they wait.

Lifting my mug to a healthy weekend.
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Old 12-03-2011, 03:38 PM   #13
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Hello Everyone,

Ruthie I know it is so confusing when it seems that our bodies are doing their own thing no matter what we do. My FBS is coming down slowly on home meter, but I have no idea why it reads much higher than the Alc reads at the doc's office. Now I'm just working at eating healthy and weight loss.

You are right about holding to our loved ones. I've had situations where these things work and some where they were a disaster. I think my fears of it not working get in the way. Yes there are some things that have to go the way we want it and some that don't. As Rie suggested, I've learned to speak up and say something before it gets away from me so that it isn't a "lot" of little things building up. I have re-arranged my kitchen putting some things like my pots and pans where they seem to want them. They are being ruined by them using metal in them, but I told DH that I was going to look at it this way. When they move out, I will get new ones. Same with some other things that seem to just "disappear". I don't want the stife in my life and I just may have to overlook some things to keep it out. That way our relationships can stay in tact when they leave and no harm done.

I also remember how I felt when deceased DH, the kids and I lived with his grandparents for a while. I loved them and I loved being with them. When DD's DH isn't here, she spends a lot of time with her Daddy and me. I realized that just maybe she feels that way about us. I sure don't want to mess that up. Also, I sure miss my deceased Mama and would give anything if I could spend one more afternoon with her and I'm sure she feels the same way about hers. I might be misunderstanding what is going on here. She may just really want a Mama relationship which I have never expected since she was so much older when I married her Daddy. I said something to her the other day about taking her for a Mother/Daughter time together and get a pedicure and fills. I told her it would be part of her Christmas. She was excited and like the idea of having that "special" kind of time together. I now see that while I do need to make some things clear that can't change, I also need to be alert for those signals that she sends that says she just "needs and wants" a Mama/Daughter relationship. What a blessing if we can build that kind of a relationship.

Bonnie Glad your internet is back on. Look forward to hearing from you.

Fatmad So glad the hives are better.

Rie I see how far the baby boy has come since they have been here and I'm sure their living here is important. He has gone from not talking to saying words even 2 word sentences. He love cheese toast and cheese sandwiches and will pick up pieces to feed himself. This morning he seemed to realize that Nanny and Mama were both here. I was busy getting ready to go to the beauty shop and his big brother was taking care of him. He evidently was ready to eat so he was calling, "Nanny, Nanny" and when I didn't answer he would say "Mama, Mama". These things were unheard of when they moved in here July 27th. I am now teaching him how to turnover and slide off the bed so he won't roll off and get hurt. This baby didn't do anything when they moved here because no one had taken time to work with him. Although I am not in the room with them when his therapist is here, I listen to what she does with him and then I do the same things during the week. He is turning out to be a very smart little boy. And eat? He used to wouldn't eat, but he eats lots of things now. That is because I give him tastes of different foods and he likes it. And it is even healthy foods. LOL I think you are right about the relationship we are gaining with them so that they know us probably better than any one else. He knows Nanny is going to be there for him and I think that is good.

I think I got everyone who has written recently. If not, I'm sorry I missed you.
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Old 12-04-2011, 07:35 AM   #14
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Old 12-04-2011, 09:36 AM   #15
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Good Morning Chickies

I finally have found what works for me. Sunday is the day I made to be my official WI day. Just had to tell y'all that I have lost 10 lbs this week. The ticker is finally reading true again. I am really excited about that.

Ruthie Guess I spoke too soon about sleeping so well. I woke up very early this morning around 5ish. Finally got up and did some exercises and then laid back down until time to get up. This is my only morning to sleep in and I couldn't sleep. Any way, I turned it into a good thing.

Hope everyone has a good Sunday.
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