I wonder if this is depression
 

I always feel depressed and negative.

I have been unhappy and fat since I was 12. Now I am 36, but nothing ever changes. I always decide to stopping overeating, but I can't control.

My friends say that I'm pretty and cute and I'll find boyfriend. But they are slim and don't understand my situation.

I have not gone to psychiatrist. Maybe I have serious depression?

I am sorry that you are hurting (inside ).....

I am not a professional... but just thinking. maybe you can concentrate on making a healthy change to yourself (eating better, exercising etc) and keep at it and see yourself accomplishing something important for yourself. That will give you more confidence in yourself and that might change things. Just a thought :) I send you a :hug:

You should see a psychotherapist. Everyone should, depressed or not. I see one and they provide me with good life coaching skills. They help keep the brain healthy while we work on the body.

That is interesting idea. Why do you think everyone should?

Seems to me like you're depressed about your situation which is different than clinical depression. JMO.

If you lost all of your weight do you think you would still feel depressed about yourself? If yes, then I say seek therapy.

I'm still feeling stuck. I have gained more weight.

How does this cycle end for most women? Do they just get fatter and fatter forever?

No one has to get fatter and fatter. It isn't easy but we all have the ability to lose weight. Losing weight is about choices, not willpower. We set reasonable goals and then its a matter of making a choice that will support those goals or a choice that doesn't. No one is perfect so there are bound to be slip ups. Learn from them and move forward. I see you are in Japan. I think there is more emphasis on being thin there, is that right? We'd be glad to support you. Have you discussed this with your primary care physician? You might need a mild anti-depressant to juat help you get started.

Because the only people I worry about are those that do not see a physcotherapist.

I tend to agree that at some point in everyone's life they could benefit from the help of a therapist.

To answer the OP's original question - if you're questioning whether you're depressed or not, you probably are.

I was depressed for years before I would finally acknowledge that something was wrong. I seriously thought there was nothing wrong with me and that everyone had such negative thoughts about themselves all the time. It wasn't until my anxiety (caused by the depression) got so out of control that I couldn't function that I sought help. And even then it took my therapist and physician 6-8 months to convince me I was clinically depressed.

Definitely go see your GP, they should be able to help make a diagnosis and may even refer you to someone who can help even if it's not depression.

Good luck x

I'm on Team Therapy will help. I recently started therapy for my anxiety. Even if you aren't depressed or anxious, it will still give you a safe space to work out your fears or whatever, and with someone that can help you learn to move past them.