Hi Girls, wanted to offer some to anybody needing it! I fell off the wagon and got run over the wagon yesterday and today the "horse" stepped on me! lollllllllllll. Oh well, at least I still have a good sense of humor and can "get back up" and start again!
Thanks Sassy Girl!
Today is already a tough day. Looked in the mirror this morning and almost cried... frumpy should be my middle name!
Anyway, things will get better as the day progresses and I'm feeling better already. Hope everyone has a super day and I'm cheering for you all!
Oh, one more thing. I'm sure some of you girls have heard about this site, but if your on a budget and can't afford WW, etc. check out www.fitday.com. It's a great web site where you can log your food and exercise, track your goals, print out reports, and keep a journal...an it's free!!! Check it out!
sorry for the upcoming sad post...I'm not feeling too good so I'm here to get hugs.=)
I just had a late night binge. It is 2 am over here I feel . went to bed at 11 and woke up at 1230 from a bad dream. Couldn't go back to sleep and ended up...eating.
Don't want to sound superficial but sometimes I wish that I could be pretty. I see all these pretty clothes that I want to wear but I can't. I see girls walking on the street, their heads held high and full of confidence...while I try to hide my body in loose clothing and blend into the surroundings.
Don't you think that people can sometimes be mean to the overweight? I have had some little kid ask me innocently "why are you so fat?'. I could only just stand there and smile.
everyone says that it is all about self-control. will power.
I wish that there will come a day whereby I like to look at myself in the mirror, enjoy taking a picture of myself and being loved.
Centrestage, I wish I could make you feel better about yourself. I'll bet you are pretty. You know, a lot of those girls you see with their heads held high... they don't have a lot of self-confidence, either. Some of them do, but some of them fake it.
That's MY trick. I totally fake my self-confidence.
It's like a mask, you know? I used to be painfully shy and self-conscious. So I decided to practice "being like everyone else" so I'd blend in. I faked it as though I were an actor. Now, people think I'm outgoing and self-confident. I can speak in public now without blushing or stammering. I can do pretty much anything.
The more you practice these things, the easier they come to you.
Inside, I'm still the same person, but I know I can put on that mask when I need to.
Get yourself some clothes that make you feel good about yourself, and practice walking down the street with your head held high! The better you feel about yourself, the easier it'll be to care for your body by eating better.
Sending you love and big hugs...
Centrestage...I just wanted to tell you that I am 5 feet tall and right now my goal is 150. I think you're being so, so unnecessarily hard on yourself!
I'm also guessing that you are pretty.. and that your issues are more about that self esteem than actual weight
Sending you TONS of big, squishy, supporting, hugs!
Centerstage,
I agree with Famogram...you are being too hard on yourself. I understand though, when you have low self esteem, it's hard to see someone pretty even if you're gorgeous. From your posts you seem like a beautiful person, and you can rise above feeling so badly. I understand about the weight issue, people look at me differently then they did when I was smaller...but I just think of it as more incentive to be healthier and love me. You can do it girl...just be strong!!
We are all beautiful inside AND out! We just have to keep "repeating" that to ourselves!
I also had a little kid come up to me once and ask me, "Why are you so Fat?" and we were grocery shopping for not just us but for my in-laws too, so we had a big huge cartful of food and the kid goes, "why do you have so much food?" I just totally ignored the kid. This kid was about 4-5 range and running around all by himself in the store, no parent to be found!
It is very hard to keep smiling when you get treated like this, but that is the best thing to do. I think its very sad that parents are teaching their children to say stuff like that or that they dont' care enough to correct their children when it is said. (Not ALL parents and children mind you..........but there are some like that everywhere we go)
arrggg I feel a binge coming on...
tried to quell it by eating 2 large apples but I know that as soon I as end this post,I'm going straight for the fridge.
the strange thing is...as much as I dread the binge, I like it as well. I like the feeling of the taste of food replacing my mental pain.....that is until I am so full and when I realize that I have just done harm to my body and spirit again.
I have a strange trigger for this binge. Just sprained my ankle and its making it tough to walk. I think the reasons for my binge are:
1. fear that I can't exercise. without exercise I get depressed. without exercise I fear getting fat more. without exercise I won't be able to undo some of the damage my binges cause.
2. anger. anger at myself for letting myself sprain my ankle. I am filled with self accusations like 'why didn't I pay more attention to the ground when I was walking?' 'It's all your fault that you weren't more careful'.I know that this are silly reasons and I am trying very hard here to think more logically and sensibly. In the first place, things are this are out of our control. secondly, be thankful that I didn't break my leg instead. The problem I think with me is that I am always looking at things from the negative. Fear of something is what spurs me to action instead of the glory of reaching a goal.
Sorry if I don't make sense. My mind is in a whirl here and I can't concentrate very well. All I can think of is food and it is a struggle to keep myself from getting out of my chair and rushing to the fridge.
will try hard today to not binge or if I do to not overbinge. I don't want to make false promises that I will not binge because I will feel guilty for not keeping my peomise and then the vicious cycle of bingeing to relieve my guilt will start all over again.
I will try hard not to binge. go go go girlie. think positive.
The first step to success is to think positive. to think I can and I will. to accept that you are only human and that it's human to make mistakes. There is no such thing as perfect.
to anybody needing it! I fell off the wagon and got run over the wagon yesterday and today the "horse" stepped on me! lollllllllllll. Oh well, at least I still have a good sense of humor and can "get back up" and start again! 
Glad to have you hear! 
and 
frumpy should be my middle name!
. went to bed at 11 and woke up at 1230 from a bad dream. Couldn't go back to sleep and ended up...eating. 
and that your issues are more about that self esteem than actual weight 
