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01-28-2015, 08:41 PM
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#1
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Senior Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Toronto, ON, CAN
Posts: 824
S/C/G: 174/145.6/130-117
Height: 5feet1
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My binge delaying thread
This is where I propose to come when I am in danger of a binge, to talk it out with myself and hopefully turn my mind around. I welcome any and all to join me.
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01-30-2015, 12:08 PM
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#2
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Michelle the Vegan
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Bliss-a-go-go!
Posts: 5,410
S/C/G: >207/under goal/150
Height: ~5'9" of Snark
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*bringing in some cozy pillows and a cute lamp*
I'll be checking in now and then, keeping you company, and I need my creature comforts.
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01-31-2015, 12:39 AM
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#3
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Senior Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Toronto, ON, CAN
Posts: 824
S/C/G: 174/145.6/130-117
Height: 5feet1
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Thanks Mrs Snark. I actually have managed the urges ok since I made this thread. Hence the crickets.
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02-01-2015, 06:56 PM
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#4
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Senior Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Toronto, ON, CAN
Posts: 824
S/C/G: 174/145.6/130-117
Height: 5feet1
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Ok feeling bingey. Been alone doing nothing all day. Just took a shower and meditated and that didn't help. I'm scared of change. I feel lonely and bored. I feel angry. And instead of doing something productive which would probably help, I just want to eat!
I will have 130 calls of wasabi peas at 8pm and 10pm bringing my total to 960.
I hit a new and wondrous low (actually my old previous low from 2013) of 144.8 this morning, so why would I want to ruin that?
I feel sad. I have the Super Bowl on but I don't really care.
One of my dogs hasn't pooped all day and I'm worried. My dad is sick with an unknown bleeding problem. I have to learn to drive on the highway by next week.
I want to eat!
But what will that solve really? Nothing. Half an hour of numbness and then I'm worse off than when I started.
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02-01-2015, 08:42 PM
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#5
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Senior Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Toronto, ON, CAN
Posts: 824
S/C/G: 174/145.6/130-117
Height: 5feet1
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I beat the binge! I practiced oboe and piano, took my dogs for a walk and they both pooed and I feel ten times better! I have snack set up beside me (1/2 cup wasabi peas 130 cals and 1 cup low cal juice 10 cals) but I don't feel like I will eat it right away! Amazing what a little productivity can do for the mood!
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02-02-2015, 06:20 AM
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#6
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Australia
Posts: 307
S/C/G: 108/105.8/60 kgs
Height: 5 foot 6
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great work, Fluffypuppy!
I reckon I will focus on binge delaying, as I had another awful day today, too much food.
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02-02-2015, 01:04 PM
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#7
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Irish dance addict
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 425
S/C/G: 145/145.4/125
Height: 5' 3"
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I will join you too. One of my biggest food challenges is binging. It is a bit of a drug for me in a way. I use it to numb out feelings and thoughts/avoid responsibilities.
Fluffypuppy - Well done on distracting yourself yesterday! I used to play the oboe and miss it a lot, but with other activities and lack of an oboe (I had to return one I was borrowing) I haven't played for a few years. It's such a beautiful instrument when played correctly, and difficult! Piano is a favorite of mine as well.
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02-02-2015, 01:44 PM
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#8
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critter lover
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: PNW
Posts: 955
S/C/G: 160+/152/~135 and healthy
Height: 5'6.5"
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I absolutely love the sound of the oboe. I played clarinet and saxophones, and at one point I picked up an oboe to see how much different it was. Answer: VERY different. Coincidentally, I'm getting my piano tuned this week so that I can get back to playing without cringing at the flat notes. Playing used to be a great anxiety reliever and therefore binge avoidance tool, as most of my binge-y behavior comes from anxiety.
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02-02-2015, 10:19 PM
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#9
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Senior Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Toronto, ON, CAN
Posts: 824
S/C/G: 174/145.6/130-117
Height: 5feet1
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Yay fellow musicians! And people who actually know what an oboe is lol. I did a degree in oboe performance and teach oboe flute and piano.
Atmos--is that elvish in your siggy?
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02-03-2015, 11:46 PM
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#10
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Irish dance addict
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 425
S/C/G: 145/145.4/125
Height: 5' 3"
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Fluffypuppy - Nope, it's Scottish Gaelic! A rough translation is, "The Gael's resting place, on the summit." I like the notion of not stopping until you've summitted. Very fitting for weight loss (and maintenance!).
ETA: Fluffy have you ever played the English Horn? I was always intrigued by it but never got a chance to try it. I played bassoon for a brief amount of time and had a lot of fun playing those low notes! I went back to oboe for college and beyond though.
Last edited by atmos; 02-03-2015 at 11:51 PM.
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02-04-2015, 09:05 PM
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#11
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Senior Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Toronto, ON, CAN
Posts: 824
S/C/G: 174/145.6/130-117
Height: 5feet1
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Yes I have. I owned one at one time but sold it to pay for trade school when it seemed I wasn't going to make my living as a musician. I have never been able to afford to replace it as they are about$10,000. Bassoon would be fun but all those thumb keys!
Last edited by Fluffypuppy; 02-04-2015 at 09:05 PM.
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02-05-2015, 11:34 PM
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#12
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Senior Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Toronto, ON, CAN
Posts: 824
S/C/G: 174/145.6/130-117
Height: 5feet1
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I'm here again. I froze all my bread but there is chocolate in the house. Not my first choice, I am a carb hound, a salt fiend and a butter addict. Still, with the bread unavailable...
Going back to work tomorrow after bereavement but I don't feel right. Three days of work and I don't feel ready. I'm only part time but I'm feeling mental. Will food solve it? Will gaining weight make my life better? Will half an hour of oblivion last forever?
I'm at 1260 cals right now. I like to be 900. So saying "oh well, today is already ruined" seems like the thing to do.
I will come here before I eat anything else today!
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02-12-2015, 02:16 AM
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#13
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Senior Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Toronto, ON, CAN
Posts: 824
S/C/G: 174/145.6/130-117
Height: 5feet1
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I binged. I have to commit to coming here before I do. I don't know how it keeps sneaking up on me!
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02-14-2015, 06:08 PM
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#14
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Senior Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Toronto, ON, CAN
Posts: 824
S/C/G: 174/145.6/130-117
Height: 5feet1
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I want to eat! I am trying to justify it any way I can. I feel the desire in my body like a weight on my chest. I'm at 600 cals at 6 pm. 300 cals to spend in 6 hrs. Gotta save it for later. Oh it's almost like it hurts! I want to eat so badly.
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02-16-2015, 11:07 PM
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#15
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Irish dance addict
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 425
S/C/G: 145/145.4/125
Height: 5' 3"
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Fluffypuppy - I know how you feel. It's a desire, not a physical hunger, but it's so strong! How did you do? I binged yesterday and should have remembered to check in here first.
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