I applaud everyone that can move past the diet mentality. I really hope to post one day in this thread with that success.

I am pretty sure IE will result int weight loss if you overweight or even obese. However, some people might never be skinny- if their bodies' comfortable weight is higher than 'skinny'. I'd really like to be skinny, but the **** with it, if i can just be comfortable with food and stop thinking about food, i am willing to accept that.
Let me share my story: I gained weight continously and very slowly. I was always not one of the skinny ones and kinda proud that i was 'different', i never bothered. I had accepted not being skinny. Over the years though, the weight accumulated to probably 185-190lbs (at 5'4'), i am not quite sure. I had noticed how unfit and flabby i was and i wasn't comfortable with the situation. I was fine with being chubby (i had never dieted!) but not with being fat. So i decided to turn my life around. Not the worst idea i've ever had: I started to cut the junk food (the little that i ate) and began eating 'clean'. I never considered my eating anormal, i always ate normally. yeah, of course i took the second helping and i could never stop eating just one piece of candy, i always ate a lot of it (but i found that ok and normal, no bingeing as such. i just liked the taste and had no real reason to stop). Also no extraordinary emotional eating, no major crisis that i could refer to- just gradually eating too much and reaching for food when i was bored (i often ate while doing other things). I also started working out, A LOT. Everything worked for me and i lost about 26pounds or so and i am running a half-marathon on sunday. The thing is, i tend to get obsessive. With everything. With eating clean and exercising. I felt worse and worse about every 'cheat' and then i started binge and eventually, throwing up afterwards. That was the point when i started searching for alternative because i knew myself pretty well- i'm going to be even more excessive if i don't stop now. For me, reading about eating disorders made me (or better: made me want) develop one too, because you know, it's normal, a lot of people have it.I never developed a real eating disorder because i stopped it when i began.
I am practicising IE for about 6 weeks now and continued to loose weight. I consider "Life is Hard, Food is Easy: The 5-Step Plan to Overcome Emotional Eating and Lose Weight on Any Diet" by Linda Spangle the most helpful, as i have to work on not reaching to food for comfort and against boredom and being overworked- stuffing my feelings, so to say. I do not have 'huge' issues, but i am often very harsh with myself. I do not have self-esteem issues, i am very content with myself and my body not that i am back to a more 'normal' weight. I enjoy shopping and i like to wear nice clothes. I dropped exercise as a mean to burn calories but instead, run for fun, to feel good. I also do strength exercises because i want to be toned and lean. i'd say everything's going fine- this morning i was down to 149lbs. I continue to weigh myself, because i like the sense of control. For me, it's not "i want to binge" when i see a higher number (or a lower one), i rather have to fight the urge to run the weight off. I ran 19k on sunday and have a job interview in an hour, so i fought the urge to 'improve' my weight even more and run because i still have some sore muscles from sunday and instead, am going to gym tonight and tone my muscles. I am really battling my exercise fixation and my aversion to unhealthy food which still stems from the 'clean' eating phase. I am still eating more vegetables than i probably like to do but i think that's fine. I hope the 'scary' food will loose it's scariness over time. Thoughts?

I don't normally post, but I've been a long time visitor to this site. I'm a normal weight 35 year old woman ,who struggled with anorexia as a teenager, and who has been going through binge/restrict cycles ever since.

I just wanted to let everyone know how useful this discussion has been for me, Its clarified for me how SICK I am of this struggle with food, and made me decide to give up restriction once and for all. I stopped restricting pretty muih at the same time that veggie daze did, and went through a similar pattern of overeating junk, which now seems to have settled down. I haven' t binged for about a month now (I was previously a weekend binger), and feel really hopeful that this time the change will stick.

I probably won't keep posting, but I really wanted everyone who has contributed to know how much your stories helped me, and are probably helping a ton of others like me. I'm serious. The mental shift I have experienced as I've followed along has been profound.

Thanks again!

kellycg - I have read Brain over Binge as well. I think from what I read that "Eating Less" and "Ditching Diets" from Gillian Riley would benefit you. It is about allowing yourself to eat all foods, but at the same time listening to your head/body about what is right (in your case maybe lower carb). Her main thing is that we need to move on from losing weight as our goal to setting other goals (for example feeling light when going to bed and therefore not eating too much etc.).

Thank you so much! I hope to see you back here one day.

You seem to be doing really good. I will check that book out as well. I agree on the first paragraph and have wondered what I am going to do if I donīt lose the weight I plan to lose. I think as of right now I am trying to tweek my diet in a way I am happy.

For example: I always had sugary cereal for breakfast, now I have half sugary cereal and half Kashi Go Lean. I am happy with that for now. Hopefully over the next couple months I can replace the milk with yogurt and just add some fruit. I am not stressing about it though, small changes and creating new habits is what feels comfortable with me. And if I really want sugary cereal, I have it. I am very aware of portion sizes though. My perfect portion size is a cup, not 3. If you are not counting calories, it doesnīt mean you can eat whatever you want. I have never been a skinny person, so I need to learn eating smaller portions/all foods.

I like what I read on the Beck Diet Solution, that having your own boundaries isnīt a bad thing and that most skinny people have "rules", they just donīt feel deprived or think too much about it, it takes the questions/stress out of eating. If I would ask myself all the time if I am hungry, what I really want etc. I would eat cupcakes 24/7. I usually eat the same foods, but when I really want a cupcake or donut, I donīt need to ask myself, I know I really want it right away.

Tonight for example I will have Pizza. I planned this already on Saturday when I felt like having Pizza, but was already done with eating. Tonight is The Voice night, the hubby is out and I will enjoy my Pizza and an Iced Coffee afterwards.

For me IE isnīt so much about eating big quantities of prior off limit foods, but rather incorporating all foods in a way that makes me end up happier and hopefully leaner, not frustrated. I stay away from chips right now, because they mess with my head and nothing good ever came out of me eating a bag of Lays But I know, that I could have them if I really wanted to.

That sounds so good, thanks for posting here. It is great to hear that our discussion helps other people as well.

I was a weekend binger as well, so in case you read this and feel like posting again, I would love to find out how you broke free of that. It is a very strong habit and it was hard for me to go the first weekend without bingeing. As a matter of fact, I was lying on the couch all weekend watching 3 seasons of a show.

BTW I lost 2 lbs this morning...very happy about it. I will not change my weight on here for now though, I think I stick to once a week or so, but the daily weighing really helps me realize not to stress about the weight at all. It fluctuates like a ping pong ball...

kellycg and CurvyRedhead - thanks so much for sharing your stories. And CurvyRedhead, good luck on your interview! Keep us posted on how it went.

lovely30 - I hope you will continue to read and post here. If you want to move past the diet mentality, there are lots of people here willing to help you. But I understand how you need to do it in your own time and your own way.

anakat - thank you for your kind words. I am so, SO happy to hear that this thread has been of help to others. Ever since veggiedaze started this thread I have been truly hopeful that others have been reading it, even if they have not posted. I can tell you that I'm feeling so free after getting off the diet roller coaster that I'm like an evangelist who wants to "spread the word of truth" to everyone struggling with this. But as I wrote above, it's something that each person has to be ready to embrace. No one can force it on them, just as no one can be forced into any particular way of eating.

veggiedaze - I'm so glad to know that you enjoyed Josie's videos as much as I did. Thanks for breaking her information down the way you did.

"Eating Because You Ate" describes me perfectly! I would stay on plan a while and then go off plan, eating to excess and saying "I'll start over tomorrow (or Monday)." I had been doing this off and on for about 18 months, and I began noticing that my time staying on plan would be shorter and shorter. It was a ridiculous cycle and I kept thinking "WHY do I continue to do this???" But oddly enough my very last attempt at dieting (starting early February) was the most successful. I lasted about 3 1/2 weeks and suddenly I was DONE. But instead of "eating because I ate" I simply started eating only when I was hungry and that was that.

I've not been perfect - I told the story of the stress of the iPhone in a previous post and how I reached for that Starbucks mocha for no other reason than to soothe myself. But that is the beauty of non-dieting; you can do that as long as it isn't a consistent pattern of using food (or drink) to soothe. Again, so often in the past this would have been followed by a pretty big helping of guilt. And guilt about my eating always lead to more eating. That's why I know getting rid of the guilt has been the key for me.

Thank you very much veggiedaze for your reply. I will look up those videos of Josie and hear what she has to say. It is trying to break out of the only thing I have known for years and that is constantly trying to control my weight by dieting. I worry about letting my guard down.....at this point I eat way past the point of full, so trying to eat when I am hungry and finish when I am full or almost will be hard. You know it's all the stuff I have learned over the years, gotta eat breakfast to get your metabolism going.....(or in my case to find one lol) but I actually am not always hungry in the morning and when I don't eat breakfast, I can go all morning and not eat, but if I eat breakie, I am starving...lol....an hour later. I always try to eat 6 meals a day, but it just means I am constantly having to plan food. I am not living life.....someone mentioned that in an earlier post.....busy living life. I am busy alright....obsessing about how uncomfortable I am in my skin and food. I am going to keep coming back to visit here, read some more domsome "soul searching" and see if I can break the cycle. It is inconceivable to think of honestly, but what I am doing isn't helping either right? Ugh this is so hard, I just feel like crying I am so frustrated. It is a job all on its own I feel, mixed in with working for a living, being a mom, a wife, a friend a daughter.....trying to do it all somewhat good. Like I said to eat to survive would be so awesome. Thanks again everyone for your insight.

Another thought....it is mind boggling to be able to loose weight by not counting calories and dieting. I really want to loose 10-15, so I will feel better in my skin, but how do I do that eating what I want, or not watching what I am eating. It's eating the yummy....but yucky food is what makes it hard for me to prepare a salad for lunch, or go to restaurant and order chicken and a salad instead a burger and fries. This is gonna take some time to wrap my head around. My thoughts are always....loose this last bit of weight then apply the new....but will it ever happen?????? That is the question!

This is what I struggle with. Anything less than 2 cups of cereal seems like NOTHING to me. It occurred to me yesterday, after checking on this thread, that I still RESENT the idea that I have to moderate my portions. It seems mean-spirited of biology to have designed humans in such a way that our appetites don't match our physiological needs. (Yeah, yeah, I know that large appetites evolved in times of scarcity, but still.) I guess I'm not at the stage of accepting this whole moderation thing yet, let alone embracing it.

Freelance

I resent having to moderate my portions, too. For me it's easier to not eat XYZ foods at all than to have to moderate them. I don't know how that should be categorized in the grand scheme of dieting versus abstaining versus knowing my limits and not trying to fight impulses and wind up feeling like I am dieting, or what.

Over the weekend I overate - I felt gross and had soapy carb-mouth in the morning, erratic uncomfortable poops, bloated up a few pounds, and felt anxious and puffy. I started having feelings of "I am failing at life because I am eating poorly" and at one point thought "Maybe I'll let myself gain ten pounds because it's so miserable to have to eat in moderation." I hate that I waste so much time thinking about food and eating and I am constantly joking with my BF that we should get $30 worth of Chinese takeout and eat it all (we never do - he is a recovered binge eater too).

Krampus--why does it have to be 10 pounds? How about "letting" yourself gain 3 or 5 pounds? Maybe you really WOULD be happier not having to work so hard at maintaining your weight. Just sayin...it doesn't have to be all or nothing...you can be "ok" with gaining a couple of pounds, but then stop there.

Last night i went out with a friend for her birthday and all of a sudden i found myself panicking once again, the way i do when i'm dieting, thinking "what am i going to eat? how many calories are in it?" And not only that...i found myself looking forward to going home afterwards and eating MORE...BEFORE i even arrived at the restaurant!!! I guess that habit (freaking out about restaurant meal, then going home and binging) was so engrained that i actually looked forward to it!!!

I ended up eating an ok-sized (not too large) meal, but then i ate most of the dessert that we split. On the drive home, i thought about whether i was going to eat more when i got home. I added up the calories in my meal and decided they weren't too high, so i ate a little more when i got home. Nowhere near a binge though. Still, i would NEVER EVER admit this to anyone in real life. Most people are so full after a restaurant meal (especially one that includes dessert) that they LAST thing they want to do when they get home is eat MORE! I mean, i wouldn't be embarrassed about it if i hadn't eaten all day so i was starving or something like that, but this was more out of habit (a really dysfunctional habit) than anything else.

I have noticed though that this doesn't ALWAYS happen when i eat out with other people. If it's a "food as fuel" situation, such as eating lunch during the workday or stopping for food on a roadtrip, i don't get this anxiety. But when it's a celebratory dinner of some kind, i get this anxiety. Edited to add: i thought about this and maybe this means it's not the food that gives me anxiety--it's the loss of focus on the food, i.e. having to socialize when i really want to just think about food???? Because living by myself, i'm used to eating dinner by myself and i look forward to it. I almost resent it when i have to socialize at dinner!!!