Chicks in Control Overeating? Binging? Share uplifting support and gain control!

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools
Old 04-29-2013, 02:10 PM   #316  
Senior Member
 
Xena2013's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 128

S/C/G: 202.6/196.4/135

Height: 5´7

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by freelancemomma View Post
No, but if her idea of a portion is 3 bites, then she and I are living on different planets.

F.
Same here that's why I said I like everything but the three bites thing. I take from books I read what I like and skip the rest.

She hates calorie counting and that was mind blowing for me.
Xena2013 is offline  
Old 04-29-2013, 02:55 PM   #317  
Senior Member
 
SouthernMaven's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Deep South
Posts: 760

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by freelancemomma View Post
No, but if her idea of a portion is 3 bites, then she and I are living on different planets.

F.
I hear that!
SouthernMaven is offline  
Old 04-29-2013, 02:56 PM   #318  
Senior Member
 
freelancemomma's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Toronto
Posts: 2,213

S/C/G: 195/145/145

Height: 5'11"

Default

I thought this article in today's Toronto Star ("Gwyneth Paltrow is a food-borne virus killing all the fun") might be germane to our discussion. I particularly liked the second sentence in the second-last paragraph.

F.


http://www.thestar.com/opinion/comme...n_mallick.html
freelancemomma is offline  
Old 04-29-2013, 03:01 PM   #319  
Senior Member
 
SouthernMaven's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Deep South
Posts: 760

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Xena2013 View Post
Same here that's why I said I like everything but the three bites thing. I take from books I read what I like and skip the rest.
I haven't yet picked up her book (it's at my local library). But you're right - take from each book, website, blog, forum, whatever idea(s) that work for you. I believe IE is different for each individual person.

Quote:
She hates calorie counting and that was mind blowing for me.
As a former calorie-counter, I can tell you that I hate it too!

I had trouble turning off that calorie-counter in my head when I first started, but now I've managed to just about smash that sucker to smithereens!
SouthernMaven is offline  
Old 04-29-2013, 03:11 PM   #320  
Senior Member
 
kellycg102's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 355

S/C/G: 184/146/130

Height: 5'1"

Default

I haven't read to much but just want to say.....good for all of you for trying to find your way....and finding it. I am super struggling right now with food. It completely controls me, all I think about. I have read brain over binge and other self help binge books, but still struggle. I have binged since elementary school, now in my late thirties and it so bad now. If I even have one thing that I think I shouldn't it sends me into an all out binge....all or nothing. I feel sad some days to think of never eating like that agan which is ridiculous because I hate the way I feel at the same time. Anyway, I am going to go back and read some more from this thread it thought I would make a quick comment
kellycg102 is offline  
Old 04-29-2013, 05:29 PM   #321  
Senior Member
 
magical's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 210

S/C/G: 143/120/120

Height: 5'6"

Default

I have not read any of the books (or actually, any books on ED or bingeing/dieting). Sounds really interesting though!

Wannabeskinny and Surfergirl, it certainly is a difficult journey and I'm really glad that many of us here (including you both) found/are finding our way out of the unhealthy relationship we have/had with our food.

kellycg102, do read through the thread. I think many of our posts will resonate with what you are feeling now.

I was in your position and yeah, it was he** on earth. I used to rage, cut myself, punch the wall after not being able to purge everything out. Then went on to exercise for 5 hours straight and starve for the next 2 days. To top it all off, I had to hide my behavior from my family, especially my children. Then when I tried total restriction, yes, like you, I mourned for the loss of eating the food that I used to love, but it never worked because I merely binged 2 days after saying that I will never eat them again.

Please ask the questions you need to - we need to support each other on our road to recovery.
magical is offline  
Old 04-29-2013, 06:06 PM   #322  
Senior Member
Thread Starter
 
veggiedaze's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 267

S/C/G: 113/117/110-120

Height: 5'5"

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by kellycg102 View Post
I haven't read to much but just want to say.....good for all of you for trying to find your way....and finding it. I am super struggling right now with food. It completely controls me, all I think about. I have read brain over binge and other self help binge books, but still struggle. I have binged since elementary school, now in my late thirties and it so bad now. If I even have one thing that I think I shouldn't it sends me into an all out binge....all or nothing. I feel sad some days to think of never eating like that agan which is ridiculous because I hate the way I feel at the same time. Anyway, I am going to go back and read some more from this thread it thought I would make a quick comment
Please tell us your story; like your home environment in relation to food when you were young, when you began having a weight problem, dieting ect. It can be helpful to sort everything out. Everyone is different so maybe your story will resonate with someone else here, or someone who hasn't chimed in yet.

EDIT: You know, just getting my thoughts out on here has been very therapeutic and has helped a great deal.

Last edited by veggiedaze; 04-29-2013 at 06:11 PM.
veggiedaze is offline  
Old 04-29-2013, 06:33 PM   #323  
Senior Member
 
Xena2013's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 128

S/C/G: 202.6/196.4/135

Height: 5´7

Lightbulb

Quote:
Originally Posted by kellycg102 View Post
I haven't read to much but just want to say.....good for all of you for trying to find your way....and finding it. I am super struggling right now with food. It completely controls me, all I think about. I have read brain over binge and other self help binge books, but still struggle. I have binged since elementary school, now in my late thirties and it so bad now. If I even have one thing that I think I shouldn't it sends me into an all out binge....all or nothing. I feel sad some days to think of never eating like that agan which is ridiculous because I hate the way I feel at the same time. Anyway, I am going to go back and read some more from this thread it thought I would make a quick comment
Welcome!!! Good to have u here. I can feel your pain. Been there done that!!!

I am also excited to hear your story.

I had a great day. I made a couscous salad for work and didn't like it. I was really in the mood for pretzels. I decided to buy two bags of pretzels and have my three squares of dark chocolate with it. It was good! I usually would have binged since this is not an acceptable lunch, but it was exactly what made me happy.
Xena2013 is offline  
Old 04-29-2013, 06:35 PM   #324  
Senior Member
 
Xena2013's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 128

S/C/G: 202.6/196.4/135

Height: 5´7

Default

BTW is anybody else having issues with dinner? I never know what to eat for dinner. I will probably have oatmeal for dinner because I am craving it pretty badly.

So I am curious...what are your favorite dinners?
Xena2013 is offline  
Old 04-29-2013, 07:04 PM   #325  
Senior Member
 
SouthernMaven's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Deep South
Posts: 760

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Xena2013 View Post
BTW is anybody else having issues with dinner? I never know what to eat for dinner. I will probably have oatmeal for dinner because I am craving it pretty badly.

So I am curious...what are your favorite dinners?
Xena - since I've started IE, I generally eat a pretty big meal in the middle of the day (anywhere between noon 3:00pm) so I almost never have dinner per se. Today was like that. I didn't eat breakfast then went to a class that ran through 12:30 pm, so I ate about 1:00 pm. And I ate a big meal. Right now it's 7:00 pm and I have no hunger whatsoever. If I eat anything at all before bed it might be yogurt or a piece of fruit.

If I DO eat dinner, like I did yesterday because it was the weekend & that's generally the only time I cook, one of my favorite meals is braised pork chops with potatoes (sometimes mashed, sometimes parsley new potatoes, sometimes a sweet potato), turnip greens, and cornbread. Another one is a chicken casserole I make along with wild rice, a vegetable (recently learned how to make roasted brussels sprouts - umm!), and dinner rolls.
SouthernMaven is offline  
Old 04-29-2013, 08:46 PM   #326  
Senior Member
Thread Starter
 
veggiedaze's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 267

S/C/G: 113/117/110-120

Height: 5'5"

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by surfergirl2 View Post
I am finally starting to see my appetite normalize a little bit. I think i have actually eaten at around maintenance for a few days, which is a huge "yay" considering i was eating waaay over maintenance for the first week or two after giving up dieting.

It all seems so clear now. I really do think if i eat whenever i'm hungry, and just stop the OVEReating, i will lose weight. In the past, that seemed like such a hard thing to stick with, but the older i get, the more i realize that food does NOT solve my problems. I think it's a process of emotionally maturing. I used to get depressed about stuff and turn to food. Now, i am able to tell myself, "you know what, life is just not fair, there will be **** that makes you sad, and that's just the way it is, but you WILL survive." Once i am able to accept that, food doesn't really help things anymore. It then becomes not a matter of control at all--it's not like "oh i so wish i could eat this chocolate, but i'm not going to because i don't want to give in to emotional eating"--rather, it's like "i feel sad. would chocolate help? no...not at all. going on a walk might help...but it might not...but chocolate definitely won't." Once you have that paradigm shift, then losing weight is not about controlling yourself (i.e. restricting) at all. I have finally realized this!
oh wow surfergirl, sounds like things have been looking up for you. I am so happy
veggiedaze is offline  
Old 04-29-2013, 08:54 PM   #327  
Senior Member
Thread Starter
 
veggiedaze's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 267

S/C/G: 113/117/110-120

Height: 5'5"

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Xena2013 View Post
Welcome!!! Good to have u here. I can feel your pain. Been there done that!!!

I am also excited to hear your story.

I had a great day. I made a couscous salad for work and didn't like it. I was really in the mood for pretzels. I decided to buy two bags of pretzels and have my three squares of dark chocolate with it. It was good! I usually would have binged since this is not an acceptable lunch, but it was exactly what made me happy.
I've had moments sililar to your pretzel experience but replace pretzels with a donut (can anyone tell I have a thing for donuts). It's so liberating isn't it ?!!!

About your dinner question. I pretty well always have some sort of chicken stir fry. It's usually about convenience and it seems when I am hungry I always enjoy it. Usually my interesting food is at lunch or earlier. by the time dinner comes I don't really care anymore, just want to feed that hunger the easiest way possible. I just try to make sure I have some options in case the thought of chicken stir fry repulses me (like soup or something frozen that is quick to make). If all else fails go out for dinner or order in .

Last edited by veggiedaze; 04-29-2013 at 08:55 PM.
veggiedaze is offline  
Old 04-29-2013, 08:58 PM   #328  
Senior Member
Thread Starter
 
veggiedaze's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 267

S/C/G: 113/117/110-120

Height: 5'5"

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by freelancemomma View Post
I thought this article in today's Toronto Star ("Gwyneth Paltrow is a food-borne virus killing all the fun") might be germane to our discussion. I particularly liked the second sentence in the second-last paragraph.

F.


http://www.thestar.com/opinion/comme...n_mallick.html
Great read. Strange how Gwyneth Paltrow has gone from most hated/irritating person in the US to the most beautiful according to People magazine. She definitely talks about food too much.
veggiedaze is offline  
Old 04-29-2013, 10:33 PM   #329  
Senior Member
 
kellycg102's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 355

S/C/G: 184/146/130

Height: 5'1"

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Xena2013 View Post
Welcome!!! Good to have u here. I can feel your pain. Been there done that!!!

I am also excited to hear your story.

I had a great day. I made a couscous salad for work and didn't like it. I was really in the mood for pretzels. I decided to buy two bags of pretzels and have my three squares of dark chocolate with it. It was good! I usually would have binged since this is not an acceptable lunch, but it was exactly what made me happy.
Quote:
Originally Posted by veggiedaze View Post
Please tell us your story; like your home environment in relation to food when you were young, when you began having a weight problem, dieting ect. It can be helpful to sort everything out. Everyone is different so maybe your story will resonate with someone else here, or someone who hasn't chimed in yet.

EDIT: You know, just getting my thoughts out on here has been very therapeutic and has helped a great deal.
Quote:
Originally Posted by magical View Post
I have not read any of the books (or actually, any books on ED or bingeing/dieting). Sounds really interesting though!

Wannabeskinny and Surfergirl, it certainly is a difficult journey and I'm really glad that many of us here (including you both) found/are finding our way out of the unhealthy relationship we have/had with our food.

kellycg102, do read through the thread. I think many of our posts will resonate with what you are feeling now.

I was in your position and yeah, it was he** on earth. I used to rage, cut myself, punch the wall after not being able to purge everything out. Then went on to exercise for 5 hours straight and starve for the next 2 days. To top it all off, I had to hide my behavior from my family, especially my children. Then when I tried total restriction, yes, like you, I mourned for the loss of eating the food that I used to love, but it never worked because I merely binged 2 days after saying that I will never eat them again.

Please ask the questions you need to - we need to support each other on our road to recovery.
Thank you all for your kind words. My story....lol....well here it goes! I was a chubby kid since kindergarden. My dad was a binge alcoholic....drank everyday but functioning, but went on week long binges, then as i was a teen he changed to month long binges.....(not sure where I get mine from right?). I don't remember eating when I was a kid to make me feel better, which is why the brain over binge book really made sense to me......hopefully someone has read it to get an idea though, she explains that we have 2 parts in our brain....the human brain and the the animal brain. The animal brain is the one that makes us binge due to restrictive dieting and the more we give in to those urges the stronger the pathway is, which makes binging hard to stop. Sorry not all that easy to explain. Anyway back to me. When I was in grade 5-8 I remember going to the restaurant in my hometown and eating a burger and fries for lunch, then going to the store and buying....not kidding.....4-6 chocolate bars, a small bag of chips, sugary gum, gummy candies of some sort and consuming this all by the end of the day. I remember doing it almost daily. How I wasn't 400lbs I will never know, or become diabetic. We didn't really have sweets in our house, only because when my parents went grocery shopping and bought a bag of cookies, my brother and I would line a plate with chewy cookies, put them in the micro for 20seconds, eat them.....repeat another plate. We left maybe 4 or so for my sister. Ice cream servings was a cereal bowl, likely a cup and a half. I didn't start dieting that I can remember until after age 18. I remember my parents gently saying....you should try to loose some weight, but being that young I didn't know how, but yes it hurt I guess a bit. I have an all or nothing attitude. I can go for months to the gym and be dedicated but then get busy and completely go off for months. I have yo yo dieted since I guess 18 or so, weight watchers was one that I first lost the most on after I had my first child....lost 30lbs. But every Tuesday night that I weighed in, I would go hog wild that night with food and get back on the next day. I have never ever been a 2 cookie grabber and be fine with that....always a row at least. Never a sliver of cake, always 2 big pieces then sneaking some more later. I have a very irrational way of thinking about food. Doesn't matter whether I am dieting or not, I want to eat crap food all the time. I love take out and chocolate!! So when I went on this last diet I lost 50lbs.... The easiest diet and got to the smallest I have ever been....ideal protein diet, which is a low carb, balanced protein diet. I thought for sure this time I licked it because I now have learned that I love veggies being on this diet.....but my first cheat turned into a weekend of binging and an 18 lb gain of water and yuck!! I was devastated.....I thought since I finally felt good about myself and how I looked that that was all I needed and holy crap it didn't do. I felt an urgency that I needed to figure it all out then and there, but then reality hit and I realize this is going to be the hardest thing to try and fix. I think about it all day long. So I have about 15lbs I want to loose....the remander of what i gained....back on the same diet, but like all diets with me once I cheat it is hard to stay committed, so I binge here and there....maybe every two weeks maybe a month Ned then recommitting again I am miserable for 2 days...loosing my best friend over and over. My issue now is, if I have anything off plan it sends me into a full on binge....so much worse then before. So I am scared to go to an unrestricted plan, because I was doing unrestricted for a couple months and gained 20. I truly do feel much better eating low carbs, i am in control of my food more when i limit carbs. i can sit in front of cake and really not have those strong urges until one day i loose it.
Holy heck were you ready for that? Lol. I am a hot mess! To boot, I am a coach now at a weight loss clinic.....the diet I did..... thought it would keep me committed to the plan. I just don't know how to fix this. I want to eat to survive!!! End of story!!!!! I don't want to go to parties and fixate on the cake or burgers or dips that are there. I hate watching tv and seeing all the food. All these restaurants coming out with new yummy things, but I will never be able to try it all because I can't eat stuff like that every day. I sound so ridiculous I know, I get it is completely ridiculous, but its the way I feel. Any words of advice would be appreciated. I know only I can control what I put in my mouth,but holy heck, I feel like I leave my body when those urges take over, and I can't reason with myself why eating 3000cals in a few hours is really not a good idea! Long winded I know I am sorry, and thanks again for your support and interest.
kellycg102 is offline  
Old 04-30-2013, 12:02 AM   #330  
Senior Member
Thread Starter
 
veggiedaze's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 267

S/C/G: 113/117/110-120

Height: 5'5"

Default

Hmmm, I don't have much time to write to you because I was just about to go to sleep but wanted to check the site one last time. I read brain over binge and I thought it was a novel idea and it has been helpful, but doesn't seem to be the total cure for me. What has really resonated with me (and xena and southernmavin on here also like her) is Josie Spinardi take on why diets don't work. She has a book I just read, but honestly, practicly everything in the book is free on her youtube videos where she talks. Everything she says really applies to me. She says that there are two reasons why people eat when they are not hungry. One is from dieting and can be broken into 2 subcategories: 1 she calls "gasping for breath" where you overeat and/or binge because you are so starving either physically or psychologically from restriction of calories or food types, and 2 called "eating because you ate" which means basically feeling guilty about breaking your diet and eating something not allowed therefore causing youto eat more because you are trying to get your chance before you have to be strict again. These 2 categories that are caused by dieting can be eliminated simply by not restricing calories or food types. She goes on to explain why people are afraid that without rules they will go nuts, and that it usually does at first, but then it settles down. I have actally been experiencing this.

So the second kind of eating does not have to do with dieting (according to josie) and is emotional eating. She says when she first stopped dieting an solved the diet induced overeating (which I explained in the above paragraph) that she thought she was all cured, but then she still had some binges and realized there must be somthing else. And that is what I'm finding now. I am not bineing due to restrictiton/dieting, but I am still getting urges from time to time when I am lonely or bored or I just think it would be fun. And this is what she calls emotional eating. It was nice to hear from her this happened to her because for some people it seems as though the minute they stop restricting/dieting they stop bingeing. That seem to be the way with Bingefree2013 on this site. I am pretty sure you must have some emotional eating issues because you were overeating alot before you ever dieting.

So Josie divides emotional eating into a few sub categories, just like she divided diet induced overeating into subcategories. The subcategories are
1. "Licking your wounds (just feeling sad, worthless, etc.), 2. "mean girl munchies"(want to escape negative thoughts that are critical) and 3. Recreational/bordom (this is a big one for me).

Anyways, it's really interesting because she goes on to say how some people don't eat emotionally because they are the types to tackle problems and find a solutions, where people that emotionally eat do this thing she calls "learned helplessness" where you don't think anything can help solve anything so you just kind of try to zone out and endure it. I am like that for sure.

So does any of this resonate with you at all? you can watch all her videos on youtube if you just search for josielenore. That is how I am to a tee and using her sugestions have really helped. So please watch and tell us what you think if it seems like you in anyway.

Also, this carb thing is such a debate. Honestly I hate the idea of eating carbs like starch and sugar HATE HATE HATE HATE. I have avoided these things like the plague over the last few years feeling that they were the cause of my bingeing. But by abstaining from them completely I was always in a state of food obsession and insanity, and finally with reluctance I have been incorporating them and things have been alot better. In the beginning when trying to incorporate donuts I went really crazy eating way too many and right then and there I almost packed it in and returned to my previous restriction, but with some encouragement on here I kept trying and honestly now I wouldn't want more than 1 donut. It is really shocking to me. Also, there are studies that show low carb diets cause bingeing. But I know, it's so controversial because people also claim low carb diets help with bingeing. For me, the very worst bingeing I ever did was when I tried doing the paleo diet. Binged virtually every day. But it was so hard to give it up because I believed in it so much.

We have also discussed alot of actual food addiction on this thread and it is also such a controversial subject. I do believe processed foods are hyperpalatable and make people want to eat more than lets say something like broccoli, but I don't think it is the cause to bingeing. I really think bingeing is caused by either starvation either physical or psychological or emotional. That is just my opinion though.

There are many different views on what can cause this and it could be different for everyone. I think maybe yours could be mostly emotional since it was probably quite tough growing up in a house with an alcoholic dad. And then when you were 18 you probably then felt bad about your parents urging you to lose weight which would have started body image problems. And then to make things worse you went on a diet that involved restriction which probably just exasperated the problem. Then there is the possibility of a true food addiction. Josie has some ideas on food addiction too that are quite interesting. And freelance on this thread actually said something similar to what josie said. Josie said that if you were alone in the lunch room at work and started going nuts on leftover work snacks and that if a hot co-worker came in, or someone you didn't know, you would probably stop right? And freelance said something along the lines of if someone said they would kill a member of your family if you ate something then you would probably not eat it. Basically saying that what we feel are addictions might not be. I fell into thinking I was addicted, but it only made me powerless. That is what I don't like about OA.

Also, what alot of people on this thread are liking to talk about is "Intuitive Eating" (Southernmavin is our expert on this and she has really thrived with this)which is listening for you hunger signals and going by them. This is not the same as not restricting as magical pointed out which is a good distinction. If you are very badly disordered than although intuitive eating is always a good idea to eat when you are hungry, it also means saying no to eating if you are not hungry which could be very detrimenal and restricting to someone with an eating disorder. I am trying to get to intuitive eating but am not quite there yet as I cave to some spontaneous pleasure foods to not cause a binge later. It is also practice for me to not feel guilty after I eat it. The guilt is the biggest killer of all with me.

Also, wannabeskinny has some interesting ideas too. She finds a more structured approach with some rules to be working for her (correct me if I'm wrong wannabeskinny)

Basically, everyones got some good ideas. I have benefited a great deal from hearing them all to sort out what applies to me and what doesn't. I hope we can help you to figure out what might work with you. Okay, i guess that was more than I thought I'd write. I am OCD remember, so I am obsessive about everything including my posts.

EDIT: I have a million spelling mistakes and gramatical errors in this post but I am too tired to fix them and there are too many. My apologies. I need to go to bed. I am tired.

Last edited by veggiedaze; 04-30-2013 at 12:09 AM.
veggiedaze is offline  
Closed Thread


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 04:23 AM.


We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.
Copyright © 2024 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved. Use of this site indicates your consent to the Terms of Use.