[it's-gotta-go!]

I am so glad I found this site- I hope there is someone out there who can help me. I am 26 & had a problem with purging for awhile in high school right before I tried out to be a college cheerleader. I stopped it after tryout but had another problem with it a couple years later. Now I am 26, 5'2" & 161 lbs. I want to loose 50 lbs. I started going to weight watchers a couple weeks ago & have lost 4 lbs. (it's a start!!) The problem is I have purged a number of times because I go over my points for the day. I don't want to continue to do this & each time I do- I say it's the last time but then it happens again. I have two wonderful young kids & I feel like I shouldn't have this problem after seeing what wonderful baby's my body has produced. Any words of advice for me?

[Caledon]

I could be wrong but I thought I read that you cannot join WW if you have an eating disorder.

Don't worry about going over your points on a given day. Balance it out for the rest of the week. In order for WW to work you must eat within the range, including eating your min. points in the range. Purging you food may help you in not going over your points but you will be under, and that can cause your weight loss to slow down too.

WW is not such a rigid program that there will be severe consequences for going over your points in a given day, or even a week. You are trying to change your lifestyle by following guidelines, not becoming so regimated that you do drastic things.

You may want to talk to your doctor.

[Caledon]

I forgot to add that you should confirm whether or not WW will allow you to join if you have an eating disorder. If they do, then I would talke to your leader. They may be able to offer you suggestions.

[colleighflower]

Hiya it's-gotta-go

I am in a similar situation to you. A couple of years ago I started Weight Watchers, and around the same time I began to purge because I felt like a failure if I could not live up to my point range. So I guess what I am trying to say is that I understand what you are going through.

Maybe before you purge could you try some of these things to distract you..
*write in a journal
*go for a walk (an earn some activity point)
*do something with your kids
*do the dishes or something that keeps your hands active
*Have a nice bubble bath
*Plan ahead for the next day
*Do a fun activity you enjoy

I would suggest also that you talk to your doctor about your purging because he/she may be able to help you and point you in the right direction for help. Maybe at this time weight watchers is not the answer.

[brunissen]

Hi it's-gotta-go! -

I have been where you are at. I've been bulimic since I was about 21 (I'm now 42), I've been through therapy, but it's still something I have to fight almost daily.

My own personal experience taught me I couldn't do WW - I was judging myself enough, and having to do those weekly weigh-ins caused me to be throwing up almost daily. It just was always too negatively judgemental for me.

Again, this is my experience with bulimia and WW, I'm not bashing the program, it's just not the one for me.

:hugs:

[happyness]

Oh my gosh! WW made me obsessive about food too! I never purged regularly until I joined weightwatchers. I think assigning values to food made food the end-all be-all of my existance. I began purging when I went over my points total. Whether or not I was a good and deserving person was completely tied in with whether or not I went over my points total. This went on for TWO years before I sought treatment. I am no longer bulemic but I do still suffer from binge eating disorder. Oh yeah, I have never lost the weight and in fact, I'm still gaining! I now realize that I do not need a diet. I need to work on emotional problems because when I'm happy and active I lose weight and when I feel sad, helpless and powerless I gain. Hubby and I have been trying to conceive for 5 years and for 5 years I have struggled with weight. We actually had a baby placed with us for a week (her birthmother chose to parent) and during that week I was so busy being a Mommy that I never once binged - a BIG accomplishment. As soon as she was taken away I had a massive week long binge that resulted in a 7 lb gain. I feel certain that once we become parents I will again have that happy sense of fulfillment and won't need to fill my emotional holes with chocolate. Until then I struggle - I'm seeing a specialist next week. I also now work out daily on my new treadmill that they hubby got me after the baby was taken away. I'm just trying to keep it all under control but I also know that I will never again try to diet. From now on I'm going to try to eat for health instead of weight loss.

WW works for some people and it is one of the more psychologically healthy plans out there but for someone like me who is prone to eating disorders it is best to be avoided.

happyness

[Nana2]

Good Afternoon:

Your problem is one of my biggest character defects. I don't know what causes me to binge and purge, I just do. Right now I am 60 years old. I stopped for about 10 years and now I am back at it but I am trying hard not to do it every day. I am lucky because I have a special friend that I can confide in.

I have tried just about everything, therapy, overeaters anoymous, diets of every kind and description - nothing works. The desire to eat just overwhelms me and off I go stuffing anything and everything in my mouth.

The most horrible thing is that I am sure that I have passed this onto my daughter who is 37 years old and the mother of two beautiful children. The guilt is horrible.

Every morning when I wake up I think that this is a new day and a new start Some days I am successful and most days not.

The thing that I try very hard not to do is to be upset with me.

Thank you for letting me tell you my story.

Georgie

[fabeyes]

I learned to throw up by a girl in my senior year in high school but did not try it until I was around 20 years old. I married and moved from family feeling alone, but could control my body. I was obsessed. Ate at night when my husband was at work and then threw it up woohoo that was fun. NOT. It was an obsession, "her legs are thinner than mine" then i'd eat less from then on, purge more not even binge. Sure, I was thin, crabby, and emotionally in denial, out of control, and not even thinking in realistic terms.

I have three children. I stopped when I was pregnant with my second and realized I was taking her food from her and I did not want to teach her to loath her body when she got older. You need to concentrate on exercise YOU like, eat within reason not total deprival and feel good you are the healthiest YOU possible. You will teach your kids self esteem, good healthy habits for life, and teach yourself you are worthy of being on this earth for them. I took a lot of college medical classes and I know that scared me as I learned my esophogus was being eaten each time I threw up.

This is SERIOUSLY damaging your insides even though you cannot see or feel it yet.

Is it worth it to you to be thin and dead or healthy and enjoying your family? I am a size 6, not a 3/4 anymore. Six is fantastic to some, not tiny enough to most of us that are obsessed. The point is, love you as you are, live healthy as possible and above all be there for your children and for yourself as you get to age in good health.

That is truely a gift.

Good luck hun,

P~

PS my husband is thin and tall, he told me once he'd rather have me larger and happy than skinny and crabby. :-)