day 35...that means 5 weeks without a binge...i can't believe it!
thank you for all the encouragement. vixsin, i have tried therapy before...a long time ago when i had my eating disorder. i know where a lot of my food issues come from...i just have a hard time getting past them. or well...i had gotten past them for the most part until i started trying to lose weight again after i had my baby. it seems that it became a huge focus in my life again, especially after my mom passed. it took a long time to feel normal about food/my weight again after my eating disorder, and i imagine it will take a long time yet again. i'm making headway small steps at a time, although it remains difficult.
jendiet- thanks for the suggestion. i have been adding in small things but i am struggling with the fact i have to gain weight in the first place. silly in the end, since i want to get pregnant and will have to gain weight when pregnant, but i'm scared i'm going to start eating more and gain tons of weight all at once and not be able to stop it. i would rather gain slow and steady then fast, although at the same time, i really want to get pregnant, so i don't know what to do. the doctor didn't give me a specific amount to gain, but i'm about 7 pounds lighter then when i got pregnant with my daughter, so i'm assuming i should aim for that number.
the good news is that i haven't been thinking about binging at all. i struggle every time i eat something more then i normally would with obsessing about it, but i don't think of binging. which i guess is good. still just scared about the whole process i'm going through, but i really feel i'm getting stronger every day...hopefully.
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ONEDERLAND!! - 3.30.11 
