Not sure if this is the right place since I've always felt this way, not just since weightloss...
I am 5'4. I currently weigh about 154 pounds, I've gained from my lowest weight.
I have always felt big.
And I was always somewhat big. I remember being 13 and wearing a size 13 and feeling like I was huge compared to my petite mother. I wore the same size as my mother until I outgrew it and maybe that added to my confusion?
As a kid, if I stood next to another girl my age- I just felt broad, huge and hulking.
I still do.
I have gained weight and lost a great deal of weight in my life and no matter what I weigh I feel the same.
I am quite a bit shorter and I know (from them telling me) that I weigh less than two of my closest friends.
I feel larger than them.
I sometimes feel as big as my husband who is 6ft tall and weighs around 225 pounds.
We just got our wedding pictures back and I think I look odd and much smaller than how I felt that day.
I just feel weird, and I'm so tired of feeling huge.
At this point huge= ugly in my head. It's so exhausting to always feel so large and out of place.
I would also like to mention that I think larger women are beautiful! If I see a tall woman I want to be her and I find plus size models so lovely because they're well proportioned.
It's almost like I don't just feel huge- I feel like a monster.