I have the "arm girdles". I use them when I'm wearing something with sleeves, and they do work some. Like the Spanx, they work but don't cover everything all the time.
I have about as much underhang as you. It's going to take time and while a doctor might be willing to do some sort of liposuction in that area, I seriously doubt any skin would be removed at this stage. They like to see a lot more fat loss first. Like not till you weigh under 200 lbs. The fat does get in the way of their work.
I feel the same way as you. Somedays, I look in the mirror and feel pretty good about myself, and other days all I see are the lumps and bumps and the really droopy skin. It's going to take me a long time to get to where I want to go, and I'm 51 and my skin just isn't going to snap back into shape from where it is now.
I workout daily, a lot. I can feel my muscles and I am strong. Many times the excess fat and skin gets in the way of my workouts and I can't achieve everything I want to achieve. I have chaffing really bad in some places. I have to do extra work to maintain my skin. And that's just something I'm having to accept for now. There are no alternative positions that will help me to feel better. I feel good about all the work I do and what I've achieved and I try to focus on that.
And I wear the arm girdle and the Spanx!