I am right there with the rest of you. The first time I lost 52 pounds and was a size 6. However, when I looked in the mirror I still saw the old me. I had a hard time taking compliments from my friends and family when they would tell me how good I looked.
Sure gave me a perspective on how people can be anorexic and think they are fat.
I just posted this in another group I'm a member of! I went from a 20/22 to a 10 (-71#), and I'm still not happy. I *was* initially happy and now I just see fat again. It is frustrating. I feel like this is my new fat and it IS ridiculous. I have been wondering if I need counseling because it even sounds silly to me that I'm not happy as a lark right now!
I didn't see this coming, it was all smiles and now not so much. I work out 3-4 days a week and while I SEE lots of GREAT changes...I get dressed and get pissy about what is in the mirror.
Loads of luck to us all to get our heads back into reality huh!
Funny (not haha funny) but I get -20 gone & in my mind think I'm done & the mirror says otherwise.... I have about 80 lbs to go. It's hard to take compliments when poeple say ....Hey skinny ! NOT so i have a long way to go . Not discouraged but it's weird & hard to explain.
Last edited by 1spunkygal; 09-10-2012 at 06:53 PM.
Easier to change those feelings...(wanna trade? lol)
I don't know if this is true, actually. it's easier to change our eating and exercise habits than it is to change how we view ourselves and food. A big part of WHY we got fat in the first place was all in our head. We wouldn't have gotten fat (especially those of us who got really fat) if we had our heads on straight.
I wish I could get my head together and keep it together. It's my head that makes this weight loss journey difficult - not the food and exercise part.
I tried on a size 2 (Target, Merona) skirt that was loose the other day. Yesterday I had a meltdown and convinced myself I was too fat to go out in public. I don't think logic plays much part in the "feelings" sphere.
I agree with berry and krampus (BTW, belated congrats on quitting smoking! It's been 11 years for me) - it's the psychological part that's such a struggle. I'm thankful that I figured out I don't have to completely fix that to lose weight, though. Still feeling fat is part of the whole disordered thinking thing I've got going on. I've been trying to just acknowledge the crazy without caving in to it. It's not easy.
Yep, I agree with everyone! When I was "big" I didn't really care what I looked like... I always said this is me, if you don't like then don't look!
Now that I'm losing weight I am more self conscious than ever, it's really weird! I don't like wearing a bathing suit or shorts and it was NEVER an issue before. I guess maybe because I care more now??? Idk...
Anyway, same thing, lost my first 30, 40, 50 lbs and felt like a model! I was thin n hot n sexy LOL
I gained 10 or 15 back so I'm working on losing it again but every time I look in the mirror, I see the flab, the flub, the rolls, the "back bacon"...
I know it's a mind trick, I just don't know ow to change it *sigh*
PS I know it can be hard to hear ppl smaller than you complain about their size, it used to be my NUMBER ONE pet peeve! Then one day my mom was explaining to me... You know tht feeling where your clothes are too tight? You can't quite do up the button on your jeans, your stomach hangs over the sides, you look bloated in a shirt that used to be loose, or you just feel uncomfortable ALL the time? Well, anyone at any size can feel that way! It was kind of a rude awakening for me because I had never thought of it that way. I just saw skinny friends complaing about their weight to someone who weighed 100 lbs more than them....
But I guess we can all relate to that feeling, that "fat" feeling, overweight or not : )
I was just telling my SO how I used to laugh at the "skinny B's" that complained about their weight...and now my friends are saying those things to me and telling me to shut the **** up. It isn't any less real that I FEEL this way because I've lost weight. My head isn't where it should be and it is a struggle.
I need to get out of this or I think I'll just revert back to the old ways...I mean, if I think I'm fat now what's 5 more right? I really think this was a good discussion and at least I don't feel so alone now!
PS I know it can be hard to hear ppl smaller than you complain about their size, it used to be my NUMBER ONE pet peeve! Then one day my mom was explaining to me... You know tht feeling where your clothes are too tight? You can't quite do up the button on your jeans, your stomach hangs over the sides, you look bloated in a shirt that used to be loose, or you just feel uncomfortable ALL the time? Well, anyone at any size can feel that way! It was kind of a rude awakening for me because I had never thought of it that way. I just saw skinny friends complaing about their weight to someone who weighed 100 lbs more than them....
But I guess we can all relate to that feeling, that "fat" feeling, overweight or not : )
Alba, your mom is one wise woman. That is exactly how I feel! Right now I'm at the top of my allowed range (about 4-5 lbs). My clothes do not feel as loose as I'd like them to feel. I feel like I cannot comfortably wear some things because they're a little tight and it pisses me off. It's so stupid because nobody else can see that I'm up a couple of lbs. They just see me at this size. It's all in my head--and there's all kinds of crazy up in there!
And I agree, it's possible to lose the weight even if you aren't there psychologically. I continue to struggle to get my head in the right place and stop reaching for food to fix it. This last week, I decided that every time I start thinking that I'm too fat (which I am not), I'm going to tell myself that I'm really hot, and in a good way! Sometimes it works...
This is really a problem for me. I just lost 60 lbs and people recoil in horror when they see me every day -- well not horror but they just can't stop saying something.
But the the thing.. I don't see it. In fact I often look in the mirror and think I look the same.
A few things
- Just like when I was fat, the mirror lies. I can't see things in glass reflections as clearly as photos. I do find I have to take photos to remind myself.
- I suspect there may be a layer of fat or tissue or something that doesn't exactly go down for a while. So the scale says 150 but you still look bloated a bit. I think your body may reuse these materials but it takes time.
- I still have a lot of my old clothing and when I wear them, of course I still look fat. The clothing is big. It is hard to replace your wardrobe but, I think it is crucially important to purchase fitting clothing or even too tight clothing.
Clothing is tricky. Most of my clothing before was likely too small for me. So it was tight on my 200 lb frame and now I am walking around in 200 lb clothing on a 155 lb person. No wonder.
Those are my thoughts but I still struggle with it.
I have discovered that this "feeling fat" problem, is just something that will always rear its ugly head..every now and then. Mostly, for me, it's *monthly* related, so it will disappear as quickly as it came. But, it's still annoying.
Seems, though, that mine is more *mental*, than it is *physical*, as my clothes will all fit the same..yet I just feel frumpy. It's crazy how a tiny 1 - 2 pounds of water retention, will alter how I view myself, while others around me never seem to comment or even take notice of it. That's how I know it's more a *mental* issue and so I just do my best to let it go.
Sometimes it works...
