Is Anybody HAPPY??

[kaplods]

I don't think I ever really hated my body, at least not as much as I thought I was supposed to. I think it's one of the reasons I failed at weight loss for so many decades - I was taught to diet by the self-hatred method, and I never could muster enough self hatred to see me through to the end.

Eventually I'd be unable to sustain the self-hatred, and I'd lose interest in punishing myself and would inevitably go off the diet.

This time, I chose to diet "backwards," in an almost polar opposition to the way I was used to. I decided to make changes I was willing to commit to forever or at least indefinitely even if no weight loss resulted at all, and I started looking at diet/exercise as a way to reward my wonderful self rather than a way to punish the bad me (until I couldn't take the punishment any longer).

I get sick of punishment, but I don't get sick of reward - so I haven't once even thought of giving up, because why on earth would I want to stop pampering myself?

Turns out loving the weight off has been far more successful than hating it off.

[milmin2043]

Originally Posted by kaplods

I don't think I ever really hated my body, at least not as much as I thought I was supposed to. I think it's one of the reasons I failed at weight loss for so many decades - I was taught to diet by the self-hatred method, and I never could muster enough self hatred to see me through to the end.

Eventually I'd be unable to sustain the self-hatred, and I'd lose interest in punishing myself and would inevitably go off the diet.

This time, I chose to diet "backwards," in an almost polar opposition to the way I was used to. I decided to make changes I was willing to commit to forever or at least indefinitely even if no weight loss resulted at all, and I started looking at diet/exercise as a way to reward my wonderful self rather than a way to punish the bad me (until I couldn't take the punishment any longer).

I get sick of punishment, but I don't get sick of reward - so I haven't once even thought of giving up, because why on earth would I want to stop pampering myself?

Turns out loving the weight off has been far more successful than hating it off.

This is a really nice way to put it into words...thank you kaplods.

How can anyone stick with anything in which they have to hate the process and themselves? It really is ridiculous that our society has tied so much into what we each weigh.

[free1]

KAPLODS...I totally agree!

Of course, I've never been happy with my weight but I was happy with my life. I felt fulfilled and accomplished a lot of major life goals. I never dealt with depression (except after my surprise pregnancy with my youngest). I actually enjoyed life at over 275 pounds.

While I was/am happy, I realize that my weight caused limitations and I didn't want to live that way anymore. Life wasn't miserable but I believe in reaching for my personal best and my weight has truly been the area that I never mastered. I also felt like food was controlling me and it was. I wanted to be in control and look/feel healthy.

I so agree that dieting because you hate your life is different from dieting because you want your life to be better (although the old one wasn't that bad). Then again, I've been overweight since I was 9 so I don't know any other way of life...

[k8yk]

Originally Posted by kaplods

I don't think I ever really hated my body, at least not as much as I thought I was supposed to. I think it's one of the reasons I failed at weight loss for so many decades - I was taught to diet by the self-hatred method, and I never could muster enough self hatred to see me through to the end.

Eventually I'd be unable to sustain the self-hatred, and I'd lose interest in punishing myself and would inevitably go off the diet.

This time, I chose to diet "backwards," in an almost polar opposition to the way I was used to. I decided to make changes I was willing to commit to forever or at least indefinitely even if no weight loss resulted at all, and I started looking at diet/exercise as a way to reward my wonderful self rather than a way to punish the bad me (until I couldn't take the punishment any longer).

I get sick of punishment, but I don't get sick of reward - so I haven't once even thought of giving up, because why on earth would I want to stop pampering myself?

Turns out loving the weight off has been far more successful than hating it off.

Love. I could have written that myself

[amynbebes]

It's hard. While I feel completely crazily better clothed, naked? ewww. Saggy skin, cellulite, boobs that are droopy, belly skin that looks melted. I'm definitely happier but just bless the poor soul who I end up in a relationship with because I think I feel worse naked now than I did before.

[candice1022]

Originally Posted by amynbebes

It's hard. While I feel completely crazily better clothed, naked? ewww. Saggy skin, cellulite, boobs that are droopy, belly skin that looks melted. I'm definitely happier but just bless the poor soul who I end up in a relationship with because I think I feel worse naked now than I did before.

amybebes i know what you mean.... stretch marks from kids and weight gain, saggy boobs with stretch marks from kids and weight gain.... i honestly feel the exact same way id rather them see me before with all the weight then now with droopy and saggy skin... and stretch marks and lines ugh just the thot of it makes me sick....