Anyone Else?

KellyMarie90 · 02-06-2011, 06:18 PM

Forgive me if something similar has been posted before, I'm fairly new lol

I've run into some people who knew me at my heaviest (right before the journey started) but havent seen me at all since losing any weight.
When I saw them they had the usual comments (you all know the ones I mean) and then came the "how much did you lose?" When I told them 51 lbs, they didnt believe me. One person then asked-how much do you weigh now? I told them and of course, they did the math and one person blurted out "you used to weigh 180??" I didnt even have the heart to say I know I weighed more but thats my last known weight.
It wasnt that they thought I weighed more, they thought I was lighter. These people were in disbelief. I guess since I'm tall and hourglassed I carried the 180 pretty well.
Its almost kind of embarressing because it turns into people finding out how much I really used to weigh and many people comment that they didnt think I looked overweight. Theyre very kind friends, as I know I did look very overweight at the end. I dont particularly want any attention (good or bad) paid to my body (intimately, in private with a significant other is okay lol but not in public, in mixed company) but now a lot of people focus on, and talk about, what I used to look like instead of what I've accomplished.
These same people comment that now that i've lost weight they cant believe how much better I look, almost like I had beauty potential that I wasnt being fulfilled.
I don't know how I feel about this, but anyone experience anything similar?

Tigtan · 02-06-2011, 06:29 PM

180 is your past! It really doesn't matter what they think of your weight then or now. Be proud of your accomplishments! You can choose what you share with others. If asked you could say that you don't look back to how much you weighed or how much you lost .. .you're just happy you are where you are at today! Just a thought ;-)

thinner · 02-09-2011, 10:56 PM

i know exactly how you feel. i just dont tell people how much i've lost. i just say oh i dont know. it's awkward, because that points out obviously that you lost some. how much, they can only guess, and when the people start acting like you've lost 500 pounds, they really wonder. and in my case, i'm still not a stick figure and i still have a stomach, with some fat on my body. so in alot of their minds i still look like a cow, and then they hear the comments about how much i must have used to weigh, and i just want to slatp somebody for opening their mouth about something that was not their business to ask, esp in front of others.

mascara blue · 02-24-2011, 01:11 AM

haha i know that moment! I've stopped telling people I have lost less weight than I actually have, coz I am embarrassed by them finding out how fat I used to be. I also dont give an exact amount. I say "ohh...around 12/13 kg or so...) and change the subject.

martinimouse · 02-28-2011, 03:01 PM

This IS a difficult subject and often people just don't understand all that we go through during our weight loss. It's complicated and they tend to say all the wrong things anyways and want to hear about a miracle.

It's hard for us, because we have to adjust to a new body shape, often still feeling it's just an illusion and we will wake up fat again. Sometimes we feel vulnerable and exposed when we no longer have the fat to hide behind. We may feel like the same person inside after the loss and it is hard to hear others make comments that actually insults us about how we use to look. The longer you maintain the loss, the easier it gets to recognize yourself, feel comfortable in the new shape and soon people forget the old body you had and move on to other subjects.

My mother thinks I am hiding a devastating illness from her! lol. She doesn't believe I am losing the weight on my own. Some people just can't comprehend it.

Shytowngal · 02-28-2011, 03:06 PM

Sometimes I tell people, sometimes I don't. If I don't want to tell someone, here is how I respond. Usually works and gets them to shut up.

"How much do you weigh now?"
"That's a pretty personal question, how much do you weigh?"

"How much weight have you lost?"
"Oh, around 200 pounds"
or,
"A lot, I'm not exactly sure though."

K16 · 03-16-2011, 04:55 PM

This happens to me a lot. Just short of a year ago, I moved out of state. I was back in my home state over Christmas break, having lost another 10-15 lbs since moving and everyone just couldn't stop commenting.

Maybe my situation is a bit different. My family and friends often said "Oh, well you never looked that heavy!" or "Are you serious? You've lost over 50 pounds?! You've got to be kidding." The reason I personally hate these comments is because it makes me feel like I accomplished less than what I originally felt. I start to convince myself that losing those 50 some lbs wasn't that big of a deal and that I still need to lose a lot more to have accomplished a real goal.

I'll be moving back this summer to my home state, right when it is bikini body time. I'm nervous for it. I'm nervous for the comments and the emotions I'll feel from those comments.

sept15lija · 03-18-2011, 09:30 AM

I am actually shocked on how many people think it is OK to ask how much I've lost. I usually answer fairly honestly...I don't know why though. It's really none of their business. And I do find it embarrassing that I had so much weight to lose. And like martinimouse mentioned, the compliments on how good I look do bug me sometimes because I think about how badly I looked before. I am still that person...and I was in that body for a LONG time. Sigh. It's hard.

KellyMarie90 · 03-18-2011, 10:24 AM

I completely agree. If I were to (curse the thought) gain back the pounds I lost, no one would find it appropriate to ask how much I gained or to say that I looked better at my lower weight.

I guess it comes with the territory of losing weight but I never thought people would be so fascinated with my life haha