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Beck Diet Solution A step-by-step program to learn specific techniques to stay on our diet, lose weight, and maintain our weight loss for life.

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Old 06-18-2017, 12:30 PM   #91
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Good Morning, Coaches.

Great On Practice Day. Food logged. I am having fun figuring how many foods I can eat with only 1 point like my vitamix green smoothie protein shake or my breakfast of eggwhite omelette with LF cheddar and apricots for a side. Etc. . . BTW I will bankrupt the budget buying this year's Rainier Cherries and apricots.

Exercise at the gym since it is threatening 107 degrees.

I have talked about my G.G.'s theory of "always ask people questions and then listen" and "learn three new things a day." She lived to a hundred and learned the computer at 92. Anyway, my new things this week: Obviously taking that toilet apart. I'll never flush in ignorance again. Also, I found a new genre of books: cozy mysteries. As part of my struggles with anxieties, I must be very careful what I read and watch. Things too dark trouble me disproportionally. I love mysteries but can't do gruesome, torture or spousal/child abuse. This is Obviously tricky because I don't know what the book or movies contains until I watch it then the damage is done. I have found IMDB for movies. (I read the parent guide for me )Now, I found Goodreads has a list of cosy mystery authors. Who knew. While some are too pedantic (see Murder She Wrote) others are Sue Grafton who is one of my favorites. So I have a whole new world to explore. There is so much to learn if I am not obsessing on food.

BBE: You brought back fond memories of dining with you and yr DW at Faneuil Hall. That little boy of mine is now 5'8 and 132 lbs. I warn you now we will be coming back to yr town within the next couple of yrs. I hope to meet up with you two again. I know that if DS is going to a college in a big city it would have to be Boston, he loved it so much. We are looking at Boston University for the engineering. We hear Boston College is terrific but is Liberal Arts. Stillhe could do his music there. We do not have ambitions of MIT or Harvard. He would prefer Harvey Mudd on this coast.

KarenRn: I am a lifetime member of WW at 162 because at one point I was 5'6 and a half plus high hair I would have to lose another ( or weigh naked) to not have to pay currently. I am happy with tracking my 30 points a day plus 35 weekly. I was way out of control with sugar.

Ani: I like to mix up all my exercise. I bought a Zumba set of dvds for the ranch when I am down there. A nice walk, gym bike, or pilates rounds out everything. I am going to plan a series of hikes in the hopes of someday seeing if I can make Whitney.

nationalparker: One of the greatest blessing in my food life is that I don't enjoy fast food. Add that to dislike fried foods, can't drink alcohol, and hate mayo and you would think I would be rail thin.

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Old 06-18-2017, 01:27 PM   #92
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Good morning coaches,

Food on plan. For dinner last night I purchased a pizza for dh and made one with known ingredients for myself. It was great and I knew exactly what I was having. Exercise today was a short walk with Otis. The last few weeks, dh has walked Otis on Sunday, but I decided to do it today since it was all I really had planned for exercise. I will call this my day off. Those nasty fire ants from yesterday kept me from wanting to even walk on the greenbelt even though I know they were only in one spot. Last night in the night my hands were itching something horrible, where the ants had bitten me when I was getting them off my feet. It was so bad that I had to get out of bed and get on the internet to try to see what I could do. The solution is so odd that I have to share it in case any of you have this problem. First I put some cortisone lotion on them since this had worked pretty well where my ankle was itching. I had already tried ice, which didn't work. I didn't want to take Benadryl because it was 2 in the morning and that would have me groggy half the day. A fellow on the internet said he heated his itching spots with his wife's blow dryer. Well I did that and it took the itch away and I was able to get back to sleep. I have had to do it again, but it has worked better than anything else. Crazy, huh?

The next little tidbit I want to share is an article from the current AARP magazine called, "To Lose Weight, Put your Home on a Diet". Peter Walsh, author of Lose the Clutter, Lose the Weight, recruited a test panel of 25 participants who had both weight and clutter issues. Each was put through a six-week decluttering program. "Every test panelist lost an average of 10 pounds. And they all declared their homes were far more organized than when they had begun."

In the spirit of decluttering I offered up some things to my brothers that I have stored for years and don't want. If they don't want them, they are going to be donated. If they do, I'll drive them up next summer. It isn't that I don't have the space, but I don't need them. I'm hoping they don't want them, so I can get rid of the stuff now. So funny, but it bothers dh how easily I can get rid of stuff. We didn't pay for it, most of it was from my folks, so he'll have to get over it.

Maryann I'll have to look up the cozy mystery authors. That sounds like something I would enjoy. I don't think I knew you were a Lifetime WW. I had been on WW several times over the years, but didn't ever hit my goal or make Lifetime. What I do like about it is that I can focus it however it works best for me. I am pretty low carb and higher protein and it works great. I figure I'll just keep doing what I've been doing as I've been maintaining very well.

Bill Your walk around Boston sounds just great. I don't think I've been there since 2002. I loved the menu from Mr. Bartley's Burgers. Yes, being Lifetime means I don't have to pay unless I am 2 pounds or more over my goal. I set my goal a little higher than I am now. My goal is to keep working the program the same as if I were in weight loss mode, because honestly for me it has been maintenance with healthy eating. If I get to hiking more in the fall I hope to lose a bit more before Christmas because I really want to bake next year and have a little cushion.

Silverbirch I hope you have a great trip to your Mum's.

Ani If it were me, the junk food would be in the garbage, but that is because I don't want to exercise my resistance muscle quite that much. My dh doesn't eat junk either, so he would be fine with it. If he did, I'd make him take it and hide it or in his case, take it to work. I don't know if you're quite as old as I am, but I'm reading so much about the need for strength training (and have been for years). The gym I'm going to has both cardio and strength training within the same class and I'm loving it. Of course in our heat in the summer, a gym is a necessity.

Well, I think I'll do a little more decluttering while dh is at the gym. Have a great Sunday everyone!
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Old 06-19-2017, 07:05 AM   #93
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Thumbs up Monday - Eratosthenes Calculates Earth's Circumference (240 B.C., Greece)

Diet Coaches/Buddies Had lunch at a Sport's Bar with loud, live music. Our friends chose the place as convenient so they could get to the airport in time to wait out any backlog at the security check in. The choices were awful; I was tired of eating at restaurants and wistfully scanned the menu for a peanut butter sandwich with banana and pecans. I choose the Belgium waffle as the least unnecessary of the lot. Then asked about the strawberry topping. It was strawberry glop - not strawberries. So, at my request, they substituted fresh strawberries and I had a happy brunch. Good enough.

Exercise was walking yet another institution with our friends. There are places that are seriously gorgeous because serious money is spent in maintenance. Owning a home that's over 100 years old makes me constantly sensitive to how other old buildings are cared for. My problem seems to be that I spend about $1M per year less than the places that I compare myself to. Beck didn't write about flawed thinking about home maintenance, LOL.


maryann - I second your enthusiasm for Rainier Cherries. (Apricots aren't here yet.) Thanks for "There is so much to learn if I am not obsessing on food." [I think of you and your "little" DB every time I pass through the Faneuil Hall market place. I told them that he'd said he only wanted to stay in cities with a brick marked Freedom Trail that led back to the hotel so he'd never be lost. Looking forward to your next visit.]

Karen (karenrn) - Kudos for taking the time to make your own pizza to know its ingredients. Just WOW at using a blow dryer to solve your itching ankle.

Readers -
Quote:
chapter 1 The Key to Success

Are You Like Sue?

Sue began yet another diet soon after her first session with me. The first two or three weeks of her new diet went smoothly, but then she had a setback. She was so upset by a situation at work that she began "to eat everything in sight." Fortunately, Sue came to see me the next day. When we examined what Sue had eaten, it became apparent that she had not "totally blown" her diet. I helped her see that if she just got right back on her diet, she would likely gain, at most, a half pound for the week - not a major setback. By changing her thinking from I'm such a failure ... I'll never be able to lose weight, to I can start again right this moment, she was able to get back on track.

Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 22.
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Old 06-19-2017, 08:48 AM   #94
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Default and we're back

Coaches

My sister has come and gone. We had a great visit with nary a snag. And no drama. We saw my mom, in her brand new wheelchair. I just listed her sturdy walker on a buy and sell site. Coaches, she will never walk again. Which is weird as she walked and walked and walked her whole life. She is almost unable to speak now. A few words come out here and there. And she babbles but it's some sort of muscle thing or comfort thing as the babbling is accompanied by the wringing and stroking of her own hands. This is what the end stage of Alzheimer's looks like in my mom. For others it's different, but my mother is fortunate. She is content. She does recognize me and my sister. We can get her to focus for a bit and to smile and to laugh. It comes for a brief moment and then it's gone. I do love the wheelchair as I can "free her from the herd" who gather in the common area all pointed towards the tv. I used to think that was a depressing thing. Now I see it as comfort: being with others. Community. I am so happy with where she is. The staff are so attentive and they really know her. Who she is, now, at that place, in that place.

All during my sister's visit my weight was 262. Today 258. Stress. Keeps things elevated. All things it seems.

My steamroller event is now a facebook event. And I am doing a blog for it. And I have finalized my design for it I now only need to get the wood and get it cut. I am aiming for this week for that. I still have decisions to make in terms of the size of the other woodblocks mostly because I have very little funding. I am in the early stages of putting a kickstarter thing together to help with that, which I've never done before, but this is the perfect event for asking for support. But, it seems, I am behind on it all, as usual I might add.

My sister insisted on getting me good walking shoes an she suggested a new phone app for motivation: runkeeper. I like it. There is a place to set it for walk instead of run and yesterday I went for my first walk in ages. I wanted to see how far it was to walk around the block near my studio. 21min. And I found out the path through the park by the lake is 13min going from one end and then back again. Neither of these routes give me the 30 min I am seeking. More experimentation is required. It felt good to walk and good to have a goal like that. Movement, exercise is the next thing to add. I am down one clothing size and would like to be down two clothing sizes by the time my steamroller event happens in mid-August.

As Beck says in today's reading, the plan is to keep going, get right back on track. Course adjustments and planning and bit by bit while seeing the distant horizon you want to reach. It's a lot to juggle but actually, all that's required is daily effort. Sometimes I can't even muster "the effort" and those days it's about focusing somewhere else until my mojo comes back. And it has. Over and over now. I'm so grateful for it all.

Have a great Monday.

PS. I'm committing today to 30/30/30
30 min walking
30 min decluttering
30 min reading

I want these three things in my daily life.

Bye again!

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Old 06-19-2017, 09:51 AM   #95
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Good morning coaches,

Food on plan. Otis and I walked at 5 a.m. and 83 degrees heading to 117. Gym will be at 9. This is going to be a miserably hot week, so I'll just focus on getting things done inside the house in the afternoons.

My darn fire ant bites are still quite annoying. My ankles are swollen with the bites all around them. I took a couple of benadryl in the early evening last night and I think they helped. When it gets to be too much I hit them with the blow dryer which gives some relief for awhile. I guess they can last a week or so.

Of the things I offered to my brothers only one thing is a maybe and that's a set of china. So I'll save that and get rid of the other things. I think I'll load the car this morning and drop the things at the Goodwill on my way to the gym. I also have a ton of music CD's and my husband found a place that may pay for them. After I have him go through to be sure he doesn't want them, I'll take them there and see how it goes. If they don't take them, they will also be donated.

Bill Sounds like you are more than ready for at home meals. I hear you. It is hard to make good choices and even find things that seem healthy at a Sports Bar. Wouldn't it be nice to have all the money in the world to maintain our homes and then people to do the work as well. We have yard people, but dh is out clipping on a regular basis. I also know the light fixtures and walkways could use a serious scrubbing.

Onebyone I'm glad you had such a nice visit with your sister and also that you are happy with your Mom's care. I know it was so difficult at first. Alzheimer's is a tough thing and the course can be so different from one person to another. I'm happy for you and your Mother that she seems content.

Well, off I go to load the car with donations before it's too hot to feel like doing it.

Have a great start to the week everybody!
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Old 06-19-2017, 04:51 PM   #96
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Good Afternoon, Coaches.

Sitting in the Apple Store. Came in to get a new battery. They broke the phone putting it in so now they are replacing the phone which means I am here while it is restoring. This is an all day chore list chosen today because I can be in the mall to escape 108 degree weather. (KarenRn: You have braggin rights for temp.) Boy I love summer vaca. No time pressures. It would be a nightmare if I had somewhere to be. So far so good. I found two last tubes of my lipstick now discontinued; new type of eyebrow pencil half the cost; and have plans to spend a Christmas giftcard to Honeybaked ham on precooked tri tip. The only thing left is walking sticks at REI. I'm heading up to Tahoe soon and want to start using them to save my knees. Credit for safeguarding exercise long term.

I hear BBE about restaurant choices. I have made two new choices. Panda Express - no grain in bowl: veggies plus broccoli beef. I'll take a hit in weigh in tomorrow with soy but over time a smart calorie choice. Logged it. Second choice was a planned See's candy run. I ate the last piece in eight bites while sitting. Neither choice gave me the old "high" and following stuffed feeling. But both left me filled. My morning OA reading talked about making new habits to replace the old. Grieve the old by enjoy the new. Big credit. I never like the afterburn of bad food choices. I like this empty feeling.

Wave to all.

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Old 06-20-2017, 06:13 AM   #97
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Thumbs up Tuesday - 18-year-old Victoria crowned Queen (1837, England)

Diet Coaches/Buddies Exercise was beating my head against bureaucrats. It was a simple task: have DW sign a document with a notary public. A bank within walking distance of our house will do it for free. First try: she took the page to be signed and notarized but was refused because there was a following page that she didn't bring with her. Second try: the notary put my name in the slot "Spouse's Name" when he notarized her name as "Spouse's Signature." Third try: I drove her there because it was boiling hot and waited in the car; it worked. The easy part was scanning and uploading the document after it was signed and notarized. Have I ever mentioned that I hate bureaucrats.

Eating was OKish, CREDIT moi. We dawdled on the patio after dinner because the temperature had dropped and the winds picked up. The peonies have come and gone, but everything else is blooming - mostly green. We shuddered at the thought of the 127 degree F temperature in Death Valley, California predicted for today.


onebyone So glad to hear that you are comfortable with the care that your mother is receiving. "Nary a snag. And no drama" is much better than your posts in the past about your sister. Kudos for inventing your 30/30/30 plan.

maryann - Yay for finding bargains while you suffered the indignity of waiting for Apple to repair/replace your phone. Thanks for reminding me to be grateful that we don't have a See's Candy around here.

Karen (karenrn) - Kudos for donating the things that you no longer want to own in life. Hope those fire ant bites become less of a problem.

Readers -
Quote:
chapter 1 The Key to Success

Are You Like Sue?

Sue continued to have some mild setbacks along the way, but she learned how to keep these setbacks in perspective. She also learned how to prepare in advance for stressful times. She got to the point where she was able to stick to her plan, no matter what was going on in her life. She broke out of her yo-yo dieting cycle, lost more than 55 pounds, and has kept it off for more than 12 years.

Sue's story is typical of the dieters I work with now and have worked with over the years. It can be your story as well.

Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 22.
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Old 06-20-2017, 10:05 AM   #98
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Good Morning, Coaches.

Blissfully sitting in the chair. I love checking off boxes for chores but then I remember this is also my vacation.I need to allow myself to rest some as well. Survived the city at 111 degrees yesterday. I felt triumphant and then I watch PBS news showing how one man has worked twenty years pulling a homemade trolley cart for commuters in Manila. He made nine dollars a day, slept on the trolley at night and sent money back to his family. Perspective. I am so grateful for all I have - air conditioning, food choices, health. I know that any human struggles despite his/her circumstances and it is well documented that often the craziest people are the richest. Buddha had it right to my thinking - the path of moderation. Certainly true with food. Today I have a plan that avoids extremes, a path I can live with for a healthy lifetime. Like BBE's Sue, I can keep setback's in perspective.

Weight at ticker. Another OP day logged and stretches completed on the carpet with a weight. These exercises have been so helpful for my residual neck issues. I have dinner with my middle brother tonite. He struggles with his bipolar diagnosis. I am somewhat apprehensive but I continue to try and be compassionate with myself regarding my fear. Growing up in an explosive house has made me more sensitive to erratic behavior. I use to desensitize myself with food. Now I must protect myself in other ways through self talk and boundaries.

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Old 06-20-2017, 12:53 PM   #99
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Good morning coaches,

Food on plan. Exercise is limited today. I took Otis for a walk this morning, but I'll miss yoga due to choosing new appliances with the kitchen designer at noon. It needs to be done. I'm getting steps in the house today, packing things up. It's a bit of a boring day, but I can't bring myself to try to think of more things to do with the temps expected to be nearing 120. Honestly I don't think it will get that hot, some clouds have moved in, but we'll see.

Maryann I hope you do get to enjoy some relaxation over your vacation time. Good luck on the dinner with your brother. We have so little family and some of them are difficult to tolerate. I wish it were different.

Bill Somehow it seems the bureaucrats you deal with seem to be those that are incompetent. Bummer! Oh I would have loved to see your peonies. I always loved them. My cousin recently posted a photo of some yellow ones she has in her yard. The ones I had were pink and crimson.

Waving to everyone else and I'm off to get a little more done around here.
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Old 06-21-2017, 01:12 AM   #100
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Walked my 30 min but didn't read or declutter. I ease into this stuff so I'm ok with that. The walking is the most important right now.

Food is good. Well, ha ha, food IS good, understatement that! I mean my food choices today have been good. Credit.

Scale held at 258.8. Looking for it to let go soon.

Also, I am reporting that 7 of our members at the Potters and Weaver's guild upstairs from us showed up at Town Council meeting and we fought City Hall successfully today. We raised sufficient points to have council defer our impending horrendous cost increases. I was ready to wag my finger at them all. It was not needed. Call me crazy but I find local politics super interesting.

Bye for now.

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Old 06-21-2017, 05:27 AM   #101
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Thumbs up Wednesday - Summer Solstice

Diet Coaches/Buddies Walk, CREDIT moi, included stopping at the bank for a simple task. It remained a simple task. A tall man greeted me as I walked in and insisted on telling me that there were two tellers available and that either one would be able to help me. Duh! He's new here - quite young. I've been going to this bank since before he was born. Don't know why a bank needs a Walmart Greeter.

Food was OK, CREDIT moi. It's a joy to celebrate that food for the day included fresh peaches, strawberries and blueberries, as well as fresh spinach and salmon served with those little purple potatoes and a green salad from our garden. I asked DW if this was what heaven would be like. She responded that I wouldn't be able to eat in heaven since then I'd have to poop and that would mess up the clouds. Being married to a biologist can be uninspirational at times, LOL. I spent the day catching up with some paperwork that annoys me because it's stuff that I don't like to do so I don't like it even more when I'm doing it near its deadline. Actually, by my standards, I'm doing it early since I have until June 30th to get it done.


onebyone Super Congrats for working local politics - you may have a calling. One of our favorite politicians, Tip O'Neill, famously said "All politics is local." Get in the business - we need good ones.

maryann - Thanks for "Perspective" - it's so easy to only see what we don't have. Kudos for allowing yourself some rest as well.

Karen (karenrn) - Neat that the kitchen planning keeps moving forward. 120 degrees F sends my head spinning.

Readers -
Quote:
chapter 1 The Key to Success

Are You Like Sue?
Whether you're depressed or content,
a stay-at-home or working parent, a binge eater or
social eater, a dieting novice or dieting pro,

the Beck Diet Solution can help you.
Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 22.
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Old 06-21-2017, 08:18 AM   #102
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hi coaches!
I went to a conference thursday and overate desserts there, and then i had way too much cake over the weekend. It was vegan cake and amazingly good- but you can eat sugar and still be a vegan. good to be back home and back in control of the available food, but it was great to see everyone.

I drove my aunts car home with her and got back safely. It was really hot and the A/c wasn’t working in the passenger seat, just blowing air, which my aunt was puzzled about. Then I got into the driver seat and it was working on that side so the mystery was solved. My aunt can be very definite that she is right in many ways and often operates without a filter but she means well and I am glad she is doing well and in my life.

Now it is time to do the things i’ve been putting off like figuring out the UK train system so I can buy a ticket ahead of time and save a lot of money, and figure out how the kids can text their friends back home without racking up hundreds of dollars. There’s a thing called What’s app that sounds good, but i presume their friends would have to have it too and that may not happen. I get very anxious before trips and tend to procrastinate the not so fun stuff.

Maryann-a great series of cozy mysteries is Rosemary and Thyme, which involves gardeners who become involved in solving murders. Lots of beautiful plants and two great actresses. And for books I love Agatha Raisin by MC Beaton, a great character. The English do cozy mysteries the best!

Bill- i used to go to Bartleys Burgers! although i think it was Mrs Bartley at the time. Glad to see its still in business, great burgers.

Wave to all!
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Old 06-21-2017, 10:34 AM   #103
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Good morning coaches,

Food on plan and the plan is just the same as it has been. There is a way to change the WW ap on the phone from losing to maintenance, but since I was maintaining on what I was doing I plan to just continue on with that. Otis and I had a pretty short walk this morning and I'll go to the gym at 9. It was about 85 when we walked and I'm thinking if we just go a little further each day we will both get used to it. It's pretty warm in the gym, so I hope I'm acclimating. Those young folks seem to tolerate it better than I do. I do think I get so distracted with what I have to do once I get in to it that I forget about the temp before too long. They have air conditioning and big fans, but the gym is in a warehouse type building with big garage doors on the end that they open when it isn't as hot.

Appliance shopping went fine. We choose pretty basic stuff for the kitchen except for a really nice Thermador Induction Cooktop and a small beverage fridge. It isn't just a wine fridge because we don't drink much wine. Hiking Suzanne told me about the induction cooktop and it really is cool. The salesman gave us a demonstration and it is so fast and the cooktop doesn't get hot. Because of the way it works the pans have to be magnetic as in not aluminum or whatever. I have All Clad which I'm not crazy about, but thank goodness when I came home and put a magnet to them; they will work. I do need to get a couple of new frying pans though, because I need some that have the non-stick surface. Today we will be going to the cabinet shop for hopefully the real selection. Dh choose something out of their catalogue and I have a feeling they are pricey. We were provided with two catalogues and it was easy for me to tell which one was for the higher cost cabinet. I had to tell dh, "It's like the difference between the Neiman Marcus catalogue vs the Macy's catalogue." I think he got it then. I like the cabinets he choose too, so hopefully he can live with the price.

Onebyone I'm glad your Town Meeting came out okay and you didn't have to let them have it.

Bill What a delicious and nutritious food day you had!

Curlyjax I used What's App when I was in Spain and it worked great. My husband and I both downloaded the free ap to our phones, but I'm not sure both people have to have it. You could always try it at home first. I'm not that tech savvy to know.

It did get to 118 degrees here in Scottsdale yesterday and 119 in Phoenix. To me once it gets to 110 it's pretty miserable. Our temps won't be below that for a high until next Tuesday. I just remind myself that I will be doing what people in the cold states do in the winter months, mostly indoor things. Have a great day everybody!
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Old 06-21-2017, 11:41 AM   #104
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I have been MIA for a few days - I knew this month would be pretty spotty on check-in and personal communications, and that'll continue for the next week. I fly out tomorrow to see my brother, and am looking forward to that. I have to run some errands, pack and get dinner made/cleaned up tonight. Woke up this morning and started puttering in the garden/patio area and just wanted to stay there and spend a few hours on that with the cool morning temps. Now have talked myself into taking a half vacation day this afternoon to run the errands, get hair cut and buy the color to do myself. Not sure I'll have all the time I need to get done what I want to... same story, different day.

Our weekend trip to visit friends was great - we took a road trip to the Cooper Chapel and it was one of the most beautiful chapels I've ever been to. The architect was Fay Jones and now I want to familiarize myself with more of his. Food on the trip was a combo of indulgent (they baked us a chocolate cake!) and average. It wasn't on my plan, though, so the carbs, while not "bad" weren't sprouted grain bread, for example. Onward and forward. I can see that this May/June are the toughest so far for me. Food won't be as much of a challenge at my brother's as I'm comfortable buying and bringing some things.

Good news from my brother - the tumor has not grown and his bloodwork is good. Relief!
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Old 06-21-2017, 11:51 AM   #105
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Good Morning, Coaches.

Continuing on with perspective, today. I wrote in the morning I needed to make some relax time. Then I kept going at "break neck speed" until the inevitable result occurred - I broke something. Rushing to eat lunch while driving DS to lessons after an icky dentist session, I backed into the garage door before it was fully open. I dropped some horrible swear words that DS had to witness and then burst into tears for the hour drive to lessons. Oh Well. (I force myself to say even though I feel sick over it.)

Credit for the following:
Pitching a fit lasted only 15 minutes.
I didn't call DH in hysterics screaming
I apologized to DS
I didn't eat over it.
I went to an AA meeting last night and talked to a desperate boy with 8 days sobriety. (perspective)
Forgave myself (still stings)
Thanked God for the opportunity to learn a lesson with just money involved. What if I had pulled out too fast and there was a person behind me?

So the garage man is coming on Friday. Between trying to fix the toilet and fixing the door, this is a very expensive summer. I will have to be very conservative but I'll still have wonderful prepaid trips to enjoy. A week long training in Monterey with time for sunsets over the ocean; Tahoe for the fourth; Lake Almanor for a wedding; Tahoe again for a family reunion; and Washington DC to visit family and friends. Food is the only real cost. It is better for OP to pack and cook anyway.

I did a some writing about why I overbook my schedule. I carry varying degrees of fear/anxiety. When I am busy, I mask it with confidence. When I am quiet, I must acknowledge and accept it. The proposed dinner with my brother (which ironically he canceled at the last minute) was causing me anxiety I wouldn't acknowledge. Because of my childhood, his mental illness is very scary for me. When I don't acknowledge that, I back into garage doors and scream so the anxiety is released. I used to release anxiety through drinking, overeating, overspending, over flirting. You name it. Now I sit here this morning and find acceptance.

Thanks for letting me go on and on. Overeating is merely a symptom of my deeper issues. This make sense right? Anybody can simply choose a diet and eat what is recommended. Yet so few people do it despite big health consequences. There are reasons I overeat and until I address those reasons, I will not find the peace for which I am looking.

Weight a pound up from the wonderful OP sushi dinner my dear boys took me to as a treat. Exercise is my Zumba dvd I bought for here at the ranch.

Keep cool everyone - literally and figuratively

Last edited by maryann; 06-21-2017 at 11:56 AM.
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