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Beck Diet For Life/Solution June 2014 Support, Discussion, Buddy/Coach

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Old 06-16-2014, 06:01 AM   #121
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Default Monday night

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I have had a quiet day - started with visit to the doctor for routine things and then working at home on the end of the phone in case there were questions about the exam. I had a very healthy lunch that had quinoa and parsley and haloumi cheese and dinner is organic chicken sausages with kale and bacon, and cauliflower. I have cooked tomorrow nights dinner as I will be going out to a gathering and I want to get into a habit of doing it. I need to go to gym on Tuesday as I will then go on Thursday and then Saturday to see trainer just returned from his honeymoon, otherwise the schedule gets messed up!

I will go to gym before work and then pack lunch and dinner so I can go to this gathering (Buddhist teaching). This is possible because the dogs aren't at home waiting for dinner! Thank you sister

Nationalparker - It is nice that your work acknowledged a significant event. Good to wear your tighter clothes so you feel the impact. Glad you could fit into your suits for the funeral - at least one stress is reduced. Glad you could celebrate your father in the midst of all this - I hope he is OK

Gardenerjoy - glad you are positive about the options with calorie counting. Hope you get your snacks sorted out

Tricia - I am now intrigued with the financial classes given I can't get to learn how to use YNAB (you need a budget)- it was a holiday project that didn't get done. Yay for another pound gone even with father's day brownies!

Maryann - Yay for a win on the weekend. It is so cute thinking of your son on a camp. Credit for taking these rites of passage in your stride

Everyone else - hope you had a good long weekend and that all is going well

Credits
- Checked in
- Ate on plan
- Logged my food
- Ate mindfully most of the time
- Ate sitting down - not at all - I so need to work on this
- I stopped eating when satisfied
- Used distraction and resistance techniques
- Weighed myself
- Steps - just made 5500 so not an active day
- Read my Beck book
- Made a food plan for tomorrow
- Made a schedule for tomorrow
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Old 06-16-2014, 07:18 AM   #122
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Thumbs up Monday

Diet Coaches/Buddies Spent the weekend away at a gathering of extended family. The good news is that no one was murdered, LOL. The better news is that I had some of the best conversations I've had in years with some folk I love dearly but rarely get to see face-to-face. Yay for family!

Eating was always with a group, always at a place that I didn't choose, always included sitting for a long spell as food kept appearing. I overate - Ouch - but kept it under what was going down with the crowd. The walking, CREDIT moi, that I assumed would be my cardio proceeded at the pace possible by three folks with crutches, canes, and walking sticks from injuries from sports activities.


onebyone Thought of you yesterday on the anniversary of your brother's passing. Sending supportive thoughts as you continue to process that.

Joy (gardenerjoy) Yay for making a plan to face the snacks. I might do well to think more in terms of plan than 'determination.'

Cheryl (GosfordGirl) I had a sample for grilled Halloumi Cheese at Whole Foods last month. It was neat to taste hot cheese that wasn't melting. Yay for having a break from dog-care.

maryann - Waving toward you DS's departure for camp. Kudos for bounding your treats while packing him.

nationalparker Smart to have a Father's Day dinner despite the sadness as part of life going forward. Congrats for being able to wear your clothes because of previous attention to your eating.

Tricia (AZtricia) - Steak and brownies sounds like a guy's dream meal for father's day. Kudos for staying on plan in the face of that.

Readers -
Quote:
day 18 Change your Definition of Full

Here's a way to determine if you've overeaten. Think about how easy it would be to take a walk at a moderate to brisk pace before you eat. You should be able to walk at the same pace just as easily after a meal, too. If you can't easily take a moderate to brisk walk after a meal, it means that you've eaten too much and you might have an unrealistic definition of fullness.

Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 158.
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Old 06-16-2014, 09:36 AM   #123
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Always nice to get to the mid-point of my exercise minutes at the mid-point of the month.

WI: -0.10 kg, Exercise: +50 700/1400 minutes for June, Food: 90% op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

AZtricia: great that you can manage to stay OP on a day with a celebratory dinner.

maryann: It takes us a whole day to pack for trips, so I sympathize with you and DS. Sending you comforting thoughts as you have this new experience. Good for you for making it fun for DS, even when you're internal picture is more conflicted.

GosfordGirl: Sounds like you're getting your planning down and making it work even on days when you need some flexibility.

BillBlueEyes: yay for family conversation! My brother and I were talking yesterday about whether we want to do more with the extended family. We decided "maybe next summer." Which is how that conversation has ended the last several years. We're glad that Facebook gives us some connection and news, though.

Hugs to nationalparker and onebyone!
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Old 06-16-2014, 02:04 PM   #124
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Good Morning, Coaches.

Disappointing scale which means I am still emotionally attached to it. Took a bit of time for me to say, "Oh Well" and stay OP. Credit step class. Using quiet time this morning to collect my thoughts. Finishing the last 100 pages of Thornbirds and trying to shake the feeling that the main characters are ungrateful whiners.

Proactive step to combat empty nest syndrome this week: I have made camping reservations at beautiful Mendocino for two nights. DH can't go but it might be nice to be with myself for awhile. I used to do it all the time 15 years ago (pre-marriage and baby.)

BBE: Weekend sounds like a recipe for food disaster to me. Congrats for weathering it.

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Old 06-16-2014, 02:53 PM   #125
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I've been working away at the gate painting/varnishing project. Happy to report I have only one side of one gate panel left to varnish. Yay. It will be installed this Friday. Will be glad to see it up and in place as this project started last year.

DH had holidays last week and on Friday rumours swirled that his company was being acquired and by the end of Friday it was sold lock, stock and barrel. New owners are based in the town my mom lived in where my brother and sisters grew up, for the most part, in Quebec. I visited there every year as a kid and I hope to heaven that we do not end up moving there. OMG. Anyway, time will tell what the acquisition really means to my/our practical day-to-day reality. It has been enough though to make me move on dealing with long overdue taxes that need to be filed. DH is most unhelpful with this. He doesn't want to see a accountant, doesn't want to file them himself-blames me for his not filing-and I am not equipped to file based on all the changes we have gone through since our last filing-hence the hesitation. I got a referral for a good accountant, called them this morning and was instructed to bring "everything I have" for the years not-filed in with me on Thursday morning. Really, I just wanted to discuss a few key things/key changes. But, honestly, I really want them to do the taxes for us. I am happy to do them moving forward, but I need help getting things into order. I did think "OMG what do you wear to an accountant to look serious?" I will have to overcome the desire to hang my head in shame that I am in this boat to begin with. But I am. And there is no getting to the other side until we do this.

Foodwise. "Where am I" I ask myself. I have no answer. While I have cut down on the amount of food, the type of food is still less than great. With DH being back on the job I feel I too am on the job-my new losing weight job. I have several realities these days I need to confront and accept.
Food choices being one of them and being responsible for myself and my food intake. I still want to forget about it. It's a bad strategy--actually it is no strategy at all--no, I go back to a bad strategy as this path leads to more and more weight and more and more body issues which are now beginning to multiply in small niggly ways. My body is protesting and I need to listen.

Yesterday I went to visit my mom and bring back some laundry and bring over a new bath mat and extended transfer bench for her shower-as requested by the place she lives in. So I thought it'd be a quick little drop in but this is what happened. I showed up on a glorious not-too-hot but nice and sunny day to find my mother sitting on the edge of her bed, staring down at her shoes, hair greasy, sweater over her shirt and no bra on *sigh* and if this were not enough she was in total darkness: curtains drawn and lights off. It was dark in there. I was so upset by this I installed the bath mat, left the transfer bench for them to do, and instructed my mum in my best "let's get going" happy but no nonsense voice that we were going out for a ride in the car. Inside, I was panic-stricken. She was ready to go, as she always is, and I didn't care about how she looked I just wanted her out of there. (She told me it was winter and was reluctant to go out.) So we came to my place where she visited with her cat Caesar and then we went back and it was time for her supper so she headed straight to the dining room and her table with 3 un-talkative table-mates.

I'm left very sad by my visit to her yesterday. Did no one check on her at all? Do the staff think it's ok to have the curtains drawn on a gorgeous day? Why/how long had she been sitting like that? On top of this she looks bad-her skin colour is changing. The edges of her face are kind of yellowing and in the car, after just walking down the stairs outside to the car (3 stairs) she was flushed very pink/red. Somewhere along the line she's lost her partial dental plate and so her smile shows not a full mouth of teeth-which has completely changed her appearance-and she used to put foundation on religiously and now never even thinks of it. Actually she used to fuss with ehr purse all the time and now never does. She does insist on carrying it though. I'm totally at a loss. I can't see her everyday, can't be there all the time, can't expend the amount of energy it takes to enliven her. It's so much. I just wish her environment was more stimulating and simply brighter. This is the downside of a small size facility--not a large enough pool of citizens to draw from when looking for a friend. Plus they are not set up for someone like my mom but more people who can still entertain themselves. It's really time for her to go somewhere else, but I am not sure that "somewhere else" will be better. I just hope it won't be worse.

So, with all this in the background, I am choosing to go back to reading Beck's green book. I am now truly starting the overeater's journal--never did start it during DH's week off--and back to showing up here and showing up in my life again.

Bye for now.
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Old 06-16-2014, 07:43 PM   #126
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Today has been a tougher than normal day. I have already spent all but 100 of my calories for the day at 4:30pm. Don't know if it is from taking the boys so early to swim for the first time this summer, or if the sugar yesterday was just not a good idea. I will have at least a little of the roast I have on the rotisserie...just looked it up and 2.2 ounces is 100 calories. A bit of smoked eye of round, then stop for the day is my plan.

onebyone Kudos for rereading Beck's green book, hope that does the trick for you!

maryann Great for a winning weekend. I am happy for you that you made it to the "oh well" for the scale number even though it took a bit. Awesome for OP and exercise!! Wishing you a refreshing quiet week and your ds an awesome time at camp.

gardenerjoy I need to be as consistent as you are with exercise. Kudos for 1/2 way!!

BillBlueEyes Hurray for a good weekend with family and safe travel!

Cheryl/GosfordGirl Yeah for sis puppy-sitting, a return of your trainer, and a quiet day with a yummy lunch!
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Old 06-16-2014, 08:41 PM   #127
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Hello Coaches

nationalparker- I am very sorry about the loss of your mom. Sending you hugs and sympathy.

Here are a few things I need to remember:

-dieting takes time and energy
-it is important to check in with my coaches every day
-boredom with dieting means it is time to make some interesting food, not eat junk

Plan for tomorrow:

-read response and advantage cards
-listen to motivation tape
-ride exercise bike
-do arm/shoulder exercises
-do leg stretches and exercises
-check in here
-drink lots of water and tea
-eat on plan

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Old 06-17-2014, 05:32 AM   #128
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Coaches

Today back in the office trying to catch up with paperwork and prep for development meetings tomorrow. Too much to do and I didn't get away to go to gym or to the teaching I wanted to go to this evening. I think Tuesdays are always difficult (especially once semester starts again) so might have to switch going to the teaching on Thursday night even though it is a really advanced class. I have done the material before but it has been a while. Tuesday evening is more of a feel good session rather than hard core philosophy. Will just have to see what works but can't miss gym.

Finished the great recipe reorganise but only the hard-copy version of the challenge. Still need to do the electronic versions! And the financial management challenge awaits...

BillBE - Credit for surviving a family gathering, enjoying the people, and not doing too much damage. That is my idea of a reasonable cardio activity. I do love grilled halloumi too and forget about it sometimes

Gardenerjoy - Right to the minute with the exercise - now that is consistency

Maryann - You are making me think that I need a few nights away while I am free of dog parenting responsibilities. Sigh for the scale being difficult. Getting that far in the Thornbirds is heroic - I could not really get into it even though the author is our national treasure. Might have to try again.

Onebyone - Credit for posting - that is showing up. I was so sad reading about your mother. We have an aged care crisis and as I get older it is becoming very personal. We were lucky with my father but if there are not staff who are proactive and who "care" for residents, they don't work their way into knowing what needs to be done and then take action. Difference between sympathy (feeling sorry for somone) - empathy (feeling with someone in their situation) - compassion (feeling a need to take action and do something about it). You and your mother have a right to expect decent care and they need to do better. No - you can't do it and go every day to check. That would be impossible. But you need to make your expectations clear to the carers where you mother is. So difficult to balance tact with assertiveness but from your posts I think you would do well at it

Tricia - Hope you didn't starve at dinner! It is useful to log everything as you go isn't it. I have made many a late change to my plan when I realise I have underestimated what I had eaten so far. It is also useful to stop a disaster. A few times I have put planned food into MFP and been stunned by the calories so had to change the plan (one day I had two dates for example and found that they were hideously expensive so had to cut out food!)

CeeJay - Yep - posting is useful so I am glad you showed up. I like your list of things to remember - I am very prone to the last and have to keep changing up my plan/menus or I get all sulky and start searching for food escapism.

Credits
- Checked in
- Ate on plan - no, I hadn't planned enough food so had a snack later in day. Not a bad choice but not on plan
- Ate mindfully most of the time
- I stopped eating when satisfied
- Used distraction and resistance techniques
- Weighed myself
- Exercised - NO - didn't get to gym!
- Read my A&R cards
- Made a food plan for tomorrow
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Old 06-17-2014, 06:28 AM   #129
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Thumbs up Tuesday

Diet Coaches/Buddies Not a particularly great day. Seems like recovery from vacation is a real job - even if it was only a weekend. Exercise was to clean up two large trash cans of droppings from a large American Elm that's looking stressed. Perhaps it's dropping extra seeds as a desperate attempt to propagate. No clear help from the arborist consulted by the neighbor whose property it's on. "Lots of trees are stressed right now," isn't much consolation from an expert.

Eating was only OK, CREDIT moi for that much. I had a snack that I didn't need. Felt off since there were no strawberries or blueberries in the fridge for breakfast. That's not a problem during the winter, but my gut knows they're out there just not in our fridge that was depleted before vacation. There were plenty in the store so I bought double; I'll get enough anti-oxidants this week alone to live an extra year, LOL.


onebyone Good luck getting caught up with your tax filing. I was behind once, long ago, when I discovered the magic that the US Internal Revenue Service doesn't complain that you don't file if you've paid enough. After I hired an accountant to fix that I've used her services ever since and am glad not to worry that they'll get me for something. Go for it and free your head to work other issues. Continued supportive thoughts for finding the right thing for your mom.

Joy (gardenerjoy) Kudos for keeping up with your exercise goal for the month. LOL at "maybe next summer" - families need a steady stream of weddings to allow gentle reunions.

CeeJay - Love this one, "boredom with dieting means it is time to make some interesting food, not eat junk."

Cheryl (GosfordGirl) This is so crucial, "I stopped eating when satisfied" - we'd all win if we just did this. Is Thornbirds read Down Under or is it just the rest of the world's view of Australia?

maryann - Yay for remembering that you are able to go camping alone - with Kudos for taking positive steps to face empty nest syndrome. I've never read Thornbirds; is it chick-lit or would a guy like the story of Australia back when?

Tricia (AZtricia) - Do you have a rotisserie and smoker on your grill outside? Drooling here over "smoked eye of round."

Readers -
Quote:
day 18 Change your Definition of Full

People without weight problems feel somewhat uncomfortable when they eat to the point where they can't comfortably take a walk after a meal. But when you eat to that point, you might not feel the same discomfort. The sensations you notice might feel normal to you. Your definition of fullness might be part of the reason you gained weight in the first place or have had difficulty losing weight.

Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 158.
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Old 06-17-2014, 06:55 AM   #130
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Hi Coaches!

Food has been good and it's reflected on the scale. Credit. I had a major "resistance success" at work yesterday....an extra waffle and extra biscuit/gravy. I moved them both to the back area, which I designate off limits. Someone else devoured the waffle...don't know what happened to the other.
I got a second wind after work and packed a picnic dinner to take to our historic amusement park in Denver. We ate salmon salad sammies/chips/banana and piece of dark chocolate; rode the ferris wheel and antique train, which travels around the lake. It's been there since my childhood...was originally acquired from the 1904(5) St. Louis Worlds Fair. We had a nice evening and stopped at the WFoods alternative, Sprouts, afterwards for a snack. I got an orange and DH some SF ice cream. It's nice to be reminded we can enjoy life with healthy foods.

I'm reading "Year of No Sugar"(Eve O.Schuab) and get a little more educated by reading her process. Most notable, so far, is how the family found that over time they lost the sugar craving which was replaced with a desire for healthy foods/treats. I have found that so true, although I am far from their experience.

Gotta run...work calls very soon.

onebyone, sending cyber-support as you work through the situation with your mom. Take care.
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Old 06-17-2014, 09:30 AM   #131
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I'm calling my second pass through Day 4 of The Diet Fix done. That's the chapter about eating home-cooked food. Which I do. I could improve it most by being more efficient. But I'm going to learn more from Lexxiss and maryann than from this book. He's more tolerant of boxed foods like frozen dinners than I allow in my plan.

WI: -0.2 kg, Exercise: +45 745/1400 minutes for June, Food: 80% op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes
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Old 06-17-2014, 11:21 AM   #132
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Good Morning, Coaches.

Quiet day. I did some chores and step class. Food OP. Ate a new white bean dip which is great for the waist and the budget. Vitamix the cooked white beans, garlic, and a little olive oil with salt and pepper. Yum! I have a food plan written down.

AZTricia: Boy do I know that feeling: 100 calories left at 2:00 p.m. I am a big morning eater. I can eat at 1:00 and never eat again but this is not a good practice for me. it is setting myself up for eventual failure. Credit for keeping to your plan.

onebyone: What a disheartening situation with your mom. Kudos for making the accountant appointment.

Lexxiss: This is funny. You mentioned a waffle and a biscuit. It is pretty easy for me to resist those normally. Then, I am watching a Popeye and i see the fried chicken covered in waffle batter and I think "Wow that sounds good. I should try it." Where did that come from? And why would I want to TRY to like such an unhealthy food? The mind of a food junkie is insidious.

Ceejay: I like the idea of changing up boring food. There is a balance. I often lose weight with a simple food routine but then I rebel.

gardenerjoy: You have helped me so much in clearing out my pantry of boxed food. I prove to myself time and time again how addiction is not a matter of lack of willpower but a deliberate manipulation by scientists.

BBE: I think there would be better chronicles of life in Australia at the turn of the century that this 500 plus pager. Although the novel is fairly well written - it goes fast.

GosfordGirl: I have to give myself credit. In January, I switched to strictly cash for everything that wasn't a monthly bill. I have diverted from that a bit but on the whole I have spent about half of what I spent last year. The trick for me was to get the right amount of cash pulled out at the beginning of the month. I started out with an amount that wasn't right. Then I up it $200 thinking there is no way I need to spend that amount. It turned out to be the perfect challenge. Cash is like calories - it is easy to underestimate how much you consume.

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Old 06-17-2014, 06:06 PM   #133
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Hi coaches-

I want to extends condolences to National Parker on the loss of her mother.
I lost my mother a month ago. It is not easy. My poor father who is 87 with bad Alzheimer's, keeps forgetting that she is dead. I knew I would not be able to give the eulogy. I told my husband and a friend what I wanted said. They covered it.
MaryAnn- I have been in a bad stage of empty nest syndrome. No one mentions how hard it is when these kids have the nerve to grow up and leave you, how hard it's going to be. But it's worse for my friends whose kids did not grow up and leave...My DH and I went to Cambodia for a month last year to teach poor children English as a foreign language. It was very rewarding.

Diet - I found that weighing myself every day was discouraging. I haven't weighed for a day or two but my jeans are not getting loose . I wanted to be much thinner for my 60th birthday this weekend. When my mother died I felt like all sorts of acid was poring into my stomach. I could only eat dry toast, then jam and toast....I finally got on Prilosec. I've been on my plan but eating too much of allowed foods.

Hugs to everyone!
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Old 06-17-2014, 06:18 PM   #134
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Onebyone- much sympathy about your mom. My parents were at a nice place -my dad is still there. It's assisted living with memory help. He has no appetite and is just skin and bones. He seems to have worsened since my mom died. It is so hard to watch your parents decline. He still recognizes my brother and me. I just don't know how to handle the loss. My oldest son and his wife are going to have a baby in December. I hope that will help to fill the holes my heart.

Credits: posted twice, stuck to healthy food.
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Old 06-17-2014, 09:13 PM   #135
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Much better day today, even though I did OP yesterday it was barely!
Earned a "genius" rating in my recording program for today.
Have to be up early tomorrow again for early swim. My plan is to eat a smaller breakfast and have a snack when we arrive home...and to wait to walk pup till we come home. It will be hot, but I need the rest (unless I can get in bed early!).

Missed Sharing-Monday Motivation: All dieters and maintainers go through periods when dieting feels more difficult. The good news is that this is 100% normal and happens to EVERYONE. Keep doing what you’re doing and dieting WILL get easier again.

Today's Beck FB Tuesday Reality Check: Losing weight takes FOCUS; it doesn’t just happen. If you’re struggling, take a moment to think about whether or not you’ve been putting enough time and energy into it. Remember, if it’s not a top priority, chances are excellent it’s not going to happen.

deelee10 Hoping you are figuring out how to deal with the stress of grief. One thing I enjoyed about Diet Fix was he encourages longer term thinking...where do you want to be in a couple years...rather than event oriented goals like birthdays and weddings which promote stressful dieting.

maryann Mmmm, white beans are yum! Kudos for a written plan.

gardenerjoy I had to return my copy of Diet Fix to the library, need to get my own as it had lots of good tidbits. Kudos for finishing Day 4.

Debbie/Lexxiss Hurray for healthy behaviors and choices leading to good numbers. Thanks for the encouragement about desiring healthy foods.

BillBlueEyes LOL about anti-oxidants for an extra year. Sympathizing about vacation recovery with empty fridges. Wishing you a better day today.

Cheryl/GosfordGirl I was fine with a small dinner, it was the right thing to have the extra protein. I love dates, guess I'll have to be super careful if I buy any!! Awesome for making gym a priority. Great credits especially the plan for tomorrow and stopping when satisfied.

CeeJay Kudos for exercises and stretches. Great reminder, so true:
Quote:
Originally Posted by CeeJay View Post
-boredom with dieting means it is time to make some interesting food, not eat junk
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Tricia in AZ
Weight loss Plan: Track food in Diet Power, Exercise Plan: walk dog + TTapp DVD 3X/wk

Last edited by AZtricia : 06-17-2014 at 09:13 PM.
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