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Beck Diet For Life/Solution May 2014 Support, Discussion, Buddy/Coach

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Old 05-12-2014, 12:05 PM   #106
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Good Morning, Coaches.

Congrats all around are in order for milestones: NationalParker for finishing her big project. Gardenerjoy for her bday. Rosebud for 100 pounds. A a similar big cheer for those trudging through with grace, dignity and not much food - BBE, AZTricia and GosfordGirl with colds and bugs and Lexxiss fighting the cold. Life continues with or without food. It will continue to have its ups and downs whether I weigh over 200 pounds or under.

I remember a counselor gave me a painted a scenario of a peaceful life: set up a single chair in an empty room, open up the windows for life to flow in, watching all that occurs and realize your only job is to keep sitting in the chair. Somehow that thought is confronting. I don't have to stop life from happening. I just have continue to be disciplined and tell the truth.

I know, a little esoteric for a Monday. On a more concrete note - I am going get weighed at Weight Watchers even though I had a less than stellar food weekend. The scale number will be information. I have a food plan for the work week. I am bring in healthy sweets so I won't rely on chocolate foraging. I had a long coffee break with DH and we talked about strategies of working through the big M. I feel a lot of support from him. Onward I trudge the road of happy destiny.

On my gratitude list for this weekend: watching my son's face as he watched a college production of Suessical the Musical. What a thrill to see the joy of live theatre for the newly initiated.

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Old 05-12-2014, 06:34 PM   #107
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Hello coaches, wishing you all a great start to your weeks.

HURRAY, the web issue that took me forever was an easy fix - a "slash pre" where it should not be...so thankful for friends who understand foreign (computer) languages! Lesson learned from the expert: Do not copy/paste from word or e-mails as there are invisible formatting characters tagging along that mess up everything.

Had the last piece of carrot cake for breakfast-yum! It was actually very healthy- 3 cups of carrots, 1 can of drained pineapple, 4 eggs, whole wheat flour...8 grams of protein moist and delicious. No frosting, so it was actually more like a quick bread.

This week is the lull before the storm of driving ds all over town for final/AP exams next week. We have a normal schedule other than coordinating the end of year pool party this Friday for our homeschool group...the pool manager still hasn't returned my call to verify he can handle 120+ swimmers so I will trying again to reach him.

Off to take kiddos to swim and run errands. Chicken burrito filling in the crock-pot for dinner.

maryann Kudos for pre-planning to avoid the chocolate at work.

Cheryl/GosfordGirl 10000 steps is great and when you are not feeling good any your eyes are dilated - AMAZING! Great job.

BillBlueEyes Dinner on the lawn makes me wish for green, rain, and lawns all of which are missing here.

gardenerjoy Happy Birthday, wishing you an awesome day.

Rosebud170 Kudos for 100 gone forever!

nationalparker So awesome that your stepdaughter is maturing and your relationship with her is good.

onebyone Kudos for chapter 1.

Lexxiss Ouch for the cold snap, hope you get to the pipes in time!

FB Beck Monday Motivation:
One of the greatest aspects of dieting is how many good things come as a result. It's not as if dieters have to work hard and watch their eating and get nothing in return. Just the opposite is true - by doing all of these things they get THE MOST IMPORTANT things in return (health, self-confidence, control, pride, reduced physical and emotional pain, etc.)
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Old 05-12-2014, 10:03 PM   #108
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Hello Coaches,

I read all your posts and appreciate everyone's thoughts and experiences. I wish I could do personals more often but right now I can't. But this time around I am not going to stop posting because I can't keep up.

So happy to tell you that I remain steady as she goes and am on plan. Ten days now. I can hardly believe it. After seven days I had a wonderful wooosh from 297 to 291. Now I need to remind myself that kind of loss only happens in the first week. I am just aiming for 287 now. Five pounds at a time right?

Take care
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Regroup: August 29, 2014 at 292
Five pounds gone: Sept 6th
Another five gone: Sept 27th

One for every 5 pounds:

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Old 05-12-2014, 10:29 PM   #109
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Thumbs up Just checking in

I posted last week after I purchased the Beck book. On Saturday I started following the food plan. There are a lot of things I appreciate about the program. I like not having to restrict calories to 1200 or so. The snack calories and the extra-bonus calories are great. I like the rewards. Realistically, the money saved from not eating out, fast food, pizza and not buying other snacks at the grocery store will offset this cost considerably. Giving self-talk that is negative a title - "sabotaging thoughts" makes it easier to deal with since it is identified. In a way it separates the thoughts from me- and makes them more manageable.

So far so good.

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Old 05-12-2014, 11:09 PM   #110
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Happy Birthday, GardenerJoy! Hope it was a wonderful day, and that this starts the next 365-day trip around the sun that's filled with memory-making experiences.

THis has been a good day ... food OP and out of work on time. DH finished mowing the lawn. I planned on doing the minimum chores tonight and did even less than minimum. As late as it is, I think I need to zip in and finish cleaning the kitchen. I felt like one day with NOTHING calling my name.

Dad's second chemo is scheduled again for tomorrow. We're realizing that they're fluid dates as everything is dependent on the tests beforehand. Frustrated that my sister pushes so hard to handle the things with them that she WANTS to do, not what they necessarily want, nor what fits in well with brother's work schedule. So instead of it all being a helping hand, he must cater to her desires or face "miscommunication" and frustration. I just cannot deal with her. I thought we wouldn't overlap at ALL but it now appears that we will when I arrive on Sunday.

Maryann - thank you for that image of our role is just to "be" ... some of your thoughts get included in my journal as things to keep in mind.

Speaking of which, I would like to set a firmer routine for journaling - it has been so haphazard lately. I didn't want to record any of the issues with my parents' health here lately. I suppose it's a bit of denial.

Tried on a few more of my clothes from a few years ago, and one more skirt and one pair of capris is wearable!

Lexxiss - Hang in there with the never-ending winter weather! You sound much more positive about it than I would be.

Lorrie77 - Good to see you checking in! I sometimes think that even if certain food costs more, it saves me money in the long run with me not paying for certain meds by staying healthier. Who knows, but I like that idea

CeeJay - 10 DAYS and SIX pounds! YAY!

Bill - Your day sounds so enjoyable - I'm looking forward to eating on our patio this spring and summer. Saved a mason jar from some homestyle pickles and put some nice stones and a big candle in there - awaiting our next evening out on the patio.
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Old 05-12-2014, 11:35 PM   #111
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Arrow feeling a bit blue

Coaches

An end of the day check in from me. I had a good food day *credit* and am holding off weighing in until Thursday which will become my official weigh in day once more. This morning I began the 2nd chapter of the green book then left for the ceramic studio and then left the book in the trunk of the car. I am debating about reading it before bed but think I will just wait until the morning when I will have extra time to read it.

I have found myself feeling quite blue since yesterday. I have been having a tough time dealing with some of the world's events and then I found myself relaying feelings to another guild member and realized this evening that my emotions are very stirred up. No wonder I was so sensitive at MIL's place. These days I just am sensitive. I find myself not wanting to deal with my mother or my MIL. I feel unable to affect any change and feel very useless.
And in a not-so-unrelated thought today I packed my bathing suit intending to go swimming. I never did go but tonight I had the thought that perhaps I should get some exercise as I won't feel so depressed. Um yeah. I remember that it helped, a lot, with that. A return to the gym will happen this week. I don't even care about the physical benefits--well except my brain is a physical thing--I care about feeling good.

Anyway we'll see how this all pans out.

rosebud170 Congratulations on your success! That's a real accomplishment! Enjoy it.

gardenerjoyHappy Birthday! May you have another fine year ahead of you!!

nationalparker I admire your restraint and coping skills with your sister. Kudos.

Lexxiss Oh I felt like throwing up reading of your snow and maybe even freezing pipes. Wow. That would send me around the bend today. I hope you were able to where you needed to be and tend to what needed to be tended. for dealing with that.
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Old 05-13-2014, 04:48 AM   #112
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Talking Well it is done

Hi Coaches

Went to bed early and slept well - will do the same tonight. Still sneezy and croaky and headachy and photophobic. Makes sitting at the computer screen all day a treat. But I am plugging away.

I reckon that if the body wants carbohydrates give them to it - so I am having sweet potato and parsnip mash with dinner and the odd banana and apple. That way I stay away from bad carbs. Still can't face gym and I am not prepared to fast the way I feel so everything on a bit of a hold but I am trying to make sensible choices and cover my daily cleaning and organising essentials (sink, bedroom, washing, and vacuum dog hair).

Big step today - I put in leave requests for annual leave at the end of the year and then one year's long service leave from February 2015 until February 2016 - and they have been approved so I am on my way out. Just this semester to finish and one more and I am gone! I am very lucky that I have so much leave owing but I will take it. Pretty exciting - now I just need to hang on.

Waiting for the new budget from the new government tonight - it will not be a happy event I am sure

BillBE - Yay for International Nurse's Day - glad you highlighted it. I love it when there is a farmers pen for the kids (lambs etc) - I usually elbow them out of the way so I can pet the animals, so your Mother's Day reads a treat. Credit for restraint in an all-out affair.

Debbie (Lexxiss) - I hope the weather hasn't created chaos for you. Our weather is also weird - it is going to be at least 75 every day this week (and humid) - TOO HOT! I nearly cooked in full sun when I took the girls for a walk later than usual today. I think I have to go back to a written log of food - MFP is good for values but it is easy to avoid the odd extras

GardenerJoy - Happy Birthday - hope you had a good night out indeed. A seafood platter sounds yum. Good to see you were already planning your sensible choices

Maryann - great and useful thoughts - don't overcomplicate things and just tread softly through the world and remember to give thanks. I like it. Glad WW is working for you. Nice that you and DH have a plan for managing the big M

Tricia (from AZ) - the embedded word code always creates chaos! good you found out. Your carrot cake sounds yum even to a non-grain eater (who often lapses)

CeeJay - Yay for 10 (TEN) days on plan and for weight loss. I am glad you are feeling comfortable and on plan - that is all that matters. Hopefully it stays 'steady as she goes'

Lorrie77 - Glad things are coming together - I like your observation that calling it "sabotaging thoughts" somehow puts it "out there" as something that can be managed

Nationalparker - Credit for finishing your project and getting your life organised. Sending soothing thoughts to manage your response to your sister - because it sounds like she can't be managed! Shame we can't pick our family I often think

Onebyone - sad you are blue. But it sounds as if you have it in hand and a plan to deal with it - exercise is indeed good; fermented foods are good - take care of your gut! Your creative life sounds totally mysterious to me who is totally left brain - but you are in charge of all that creativity and passion and productivity. Your MIL just doesn't get it. But that is OK. You can deal with it

Had better go and get this dinner together and then bed
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Old 05-13-2014, 05:35 AM   #113
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Thumbs up Tuesday

Diet Coaches/Buddies Was the first day out in a knit shirt in the 80 degree F sunny weather as well as the first dinner out on our patio. Had the loudest Carolina Wren singing in my ear - a rare bird for our yard. Then a second appeared; we've never seen two at the same time here. They looked like they were scouting for a nesting site, but that's not likely.

Eating was on plan, CREDIT moi. Little exercise as I continue to move as little as possible to avoid activating the coughing.


onebyone Ouch for the blues with Kudos for planning exercise to counter them.

Joy (gardenerjoy) Happy Birthday. May you have 39 more and 39 more after that.

CeeJay - Yep, five pounds at a time - and savor any whoosh that happens by.

Debbie (Lexxiss) Snow past Mother's Day is just so unnecessary. Ouch for those 14 inches; hope all your pipes and plants survived.

Cheryl (GosfordGirl) Super Kudos for envisioning your end game at work then making it happen. DW has a concoction that has sweet potatoes and parsnips - we need to adopt your word 'mash' since that makes it sound more fun.

maryann - I'm moved by the thought that life will continue to have its ups and downs regardless of what I weigh. Suessical the Musical sounds like a show I'd love to see.

nationalparker Kudos for dumping some frustration about your sister so that you're more available to help with your parents. LOL at the thought of "NOTHING calling my name."

Tricia (AZtricia) - Yep, there's that ancient story of the king who lost his kingdom for loss of one "slash pre" - Kudos for chasing that down. My version of your expert's advice is to paste into WordPad then copy again into where it's going; the simple word processing program filters all the stuff it doesn't do.

Lorrie77 - Always fun to be reminded of "the money saved from not eating out, fast food, pizza and not buying other snacks at the grocery store" - I was personally supporting the Hersey candy bar division. Interesting that it's useful to have a name for negative self-talk. I knew a group that used 'fruit-bats' for that. Kudos for moving forward.

Readers -
Quote:
day 15 Monitor Your Eating

what are you thinking?

Use the following examples to create Response Cards that will increase the likelihood that you'll consistently keep your written food record every day.

Sabotaging Thought: I'll wait until I've lost some weight. Then I'll feel more motivated to do this task.
Helpful Response: If I wait, chances are excellent that I'll never do it.

Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 147.
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Old 05-13-2014, 11:49 AM   #114
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Happy birthday Joy! It was a beautiful day for it.

It was good to read about everyone's NO CHOICE principles. The 3 plate one was funny, but that is common to the no-S diet (which I also just learned about) as well. Is anyone doing the no-S diet? It looks great.

It has been funny to see that I need to formulate the rules REALLY precisely to avoid violating their spirit if not their letter. For instance originally one of mine was, "I never have seconds when I'm eating at home." Obviously what I *meant* when I wrote it was to allow that I could have seconds at a dinner party or something. But then I brought a dinner of leftovers to my bf's house (we were just watching a movie with a friend, i.e. it was NOT a special occasion) and whaddaya know, I had seconds. So rule was rewritten.

Since starting the program almost two weeks ago I have lost a few pounds without yet dieting, partly from no seconds at home and partly from cutting out the after-dinner snacking. The latter has been cut out simply by adding the NO CHOICE rule that I don't eat in bed. It turns out that if I have to sit at the table to eat, I'm not interested in doing it unless I'm actually hungry!

It feels so insanely wonderful to feel more in control of my eating, although I am afraid to get my hopes up at this point; I've had other programs work temporarily and then I've stopped working them after a while. Although I do really love this cognitive-behavioral approach to the issue. I use CBT for anxiety and depression and it does work, so maybe it will continue to work for eating.

I've had some major triumphs this week… A couple days of mild depression and one emotionally difficult evening and in each case my first thought was of course initially to eat something, but in all the cases a NO CHOICE rule would have been violated so I just didn't. And it honestly was not hard, since the "Should I/shouldn't I" aspect was removed; I just remembered, "No, that's not something I do" and that was it. I love Beck's insight that most of what's uncomfortable about resisting a craving is the *uncertainty*, the trying to figure out whether you should or shouldn't give in to it, whether you will or won't eat. I think that, for me at least, this is very perceptive. I tend to be anxious and am also very indecisive and having a firm rule that takes away the need to make a decision has been very soothing.

My only NO CHOICE violation this week was inadvertent. (Although I still could have prevented it through better habits.) My second rewrite of the "no seconds" rule had been, "I don't eat seconds except sometimes at parties and restaurants." Then I'd thought about this time a couple of weeks ago when I'd had seconds at a restaurant (shared appetizer) and had ended up too full, and I realized, you know, I really don't need seconds at a restaurant, because if I eat something really amazing there, I can always just take home leftovers or else order it again on a later date. So I rewrote the rule a third time to "I don't eat seconds except sometimes at parties." But then I FORGOT that I'd rewritten it a third time, and so when I went out for Chinese with friends, I had seconds. And I got way too full. And when I checked my NO CHOICE list later I realized that this could have been prevented if I'd reread the list just before we went in--or even at the table. (This is an advantage of having the list on my cellphone… People might think you're rude for checking your phone at the table but they won't think it's unusual.) So I think the most important times of day for me to read the Advantages Card and the NO CHOICE card are before lunch and before dinner.

Right now I'm working on eating slowly/mindfully. It's easy when I remember to try, but often I don't. So I'll probably be on this step for a couple of weeks.

I'm kind of curious whether anyone who has been working the program successfully for a while has moved to more intuitive eating? Eating when hungry, stopping when full? It's fine if not, I'm just curious.

Congrats on your week CeeJay! That must feel great.

And thanks for the hello, BillBE! (Well, I think you said hello, but now that I am scanning above I don't see it. Hello in any event though!)
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Old 05-13-2014, 02:25 PM   #115
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(Freely: No time to post properly but I am more or less on the No-S plan. Modified to suit my needs. I really like it.)
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Old 05-13-2014, 05:22 PM   #116
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Checking in -
Credit - read my advantages and sat down for all meals. Kinda feeling stuck on Arrange Your Environment but now that my son and granddaughter have moved out (finally last night) I will be able to tackle that one.

Also reading Volumetrics to understand that system so have put the Beck book on hold for a few days.
CREDIT - Had a very verbally abusive assault from my son on Mother's Day weekend and I DID NOT EAT OVER IT. No emotional over eating for me is HUGE!!
My puppy is an American Eskimo also known as an ekie she has so much positive energy and keeps my spirits up.
It feels weird to be checking in and still not be on a food plan but I am doing this what I hope is the right way so it will be a lifelong change not do it for a few days and then give up which was my old pattern. So if one day's assignment takes me a week to get through it is all right as I am learning how to include new behaviors in my process and keep inching towards my goals. Slowing down my eating is still a challenge. I need to start timing how long it takes me to eat each meal and then strive for just one more minute for each meal time.
Thanks for all your support.
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Old 05-13-2014, 06:21 PM   #117
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Happy Tuesday.

Behind in cooking/food prep so today was a make the basics day: bread, boil eggs, slice raw veggies... That will make the rest of the week easier and I won't have to be up so early. OP so far, but need to do my DVD

millie56 Kudos for not overeating despite stress.

freely Sounds like you are really getting a handle on good Beck thinking.

BillBlueEyes Yeah for a warm spring day and eating outside. Kudos for OP.

GosfordGirl/Cheryl So sorry the yuck is lingering. I think I might finally be better as the gurgles are minimized today. So exciting for approved leave.

onebyone Kudos for a good food day.

nationalparker So nice for a good OP day and relaxing.

Lorrie77 Great job with the sabotaging thoughts. So helpful to be able to name and isolate them.

CeeJay Hurray for 10 days!

FB Beck Tuesday Reality Check: If you’re not doing as well with healthy eating as you’d like and think, “I can’t even do it now, how will I ever be able to do it?” remind yourself that not being totally on track is NOT an indication that you can’t do it (now or in the future), it’s simply a sign that you need more practice. But like any skill, the more you practice, the better you’ll get. This is no different!

AND

The blog has post about bedtime/sleep today: http://beckdietsolution.wordpress.co...-debbie-sleep/
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Old 05-13-2014, 08:53 PM   #118
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Hello, crew! Food has been good today - have really been working on eating until I'm no longer hungry rather than until "full" and have strung together a few successful days. Not following any plan in particular lately - just trying to cut back.

Freely - Not officially doing the No-S diet, but find that just eating until not hungry seems to cover that - just reducing the calories, I guess. Good reminders to us to reread our cards to stay on track. I'm terrible about that.

Wore a pair of capris today - ones I'd fit into for two summers. Felt good. Weather is turning chilly again - I'm anxious for the warmer temps to come for good. Remind me of this in July. Actually, I am taking tomorrow off to get a car repair done and also look for some Mother's Day gifts for Mom to celebrate late when I get there on Sunday. I have NO IDEAS and basically I'm down to books.

millie56 - GREAT credits for not eating over the situation with your son on the weekend.

GosfordGirl - I cannot pretend to not be envious of your time off - sounds like it's well-deserved and looking forward to hearing how it will be spent.

Bill - Our 80-degree day turned COLD a day later. Bring out the light jacket in a day or so. Just forewarning you.

AZTricia - Thank you for posting the FB Beck Thoughts - I don't Facebook and quite often they are very timely for thoughts passing through my mind.

Hope that those of you under the weather get to feeling better soon!

Ordered a small surprise for DH and will leave it hidden somewhere for him to find when I head back to my folks. Hope he likes it (a small top-end knife - he's a collector ... I don't understand his enjoyment in those, but just go along with it ) Hope it arrives in time.
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Old 05-14-2014, 06:20 AM   #119
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Thumbs up Wednesday - Full Moon

Diet Coaches/Buddies Eating was on plan, CREDIT moi. There was a great pull to have an afternoon snack but I recognized that I wanted a HUGE bowl of cereal - not a snack's worth. I accepted that as a clue that 'hunger' wasn't the problem so that food wasn't the solution. I went about some task and moved on. DW served 'sustainable' swordfish for dinner; she believed that if Whole Foods declared - via a green sticker - that it was sustainably harvested then it was. Both the swordfish and asparagus were grilled on our new small propane Weber grill by DW wearing a coat against the cold.

A short walk, CREDIT moi, to CVS pharmacy where I left with a bag of 200 cough drops and the largest bottle of cough syrup available. I now remember that one shouldn't shop for cold remedies when feeling the symptoms. It was interesting that the self-checkout machine wouldn't finish my order as it kept beeping for a manager. Seems that buying cough medicine puts me on the list of drug dealers and I had to be examined to see if I looked to be over 18 years old. I did. No mixed feelings.


nationalparker It's such a big step to recognize that we've drifted into thinking 'full' or even 'stuffed' is the goal instead of the simple 'no longer hungry.' Kudos for working that. Perhaps your mom would like a box of fancy pecans or walnuts or dried fruits - something not in their daily diet, but that would serve your goal to get extra food into both of them. [Your COLD arrived - thanks for the warning.]

Tricia (AZtricia) - Thanks for the Beck reminder that practice is how we overcome "can't."

flnu - Waving back to the other side of the planet.

freely - Love the powerful clarity in, "No, that's not something I do." Kudos for continuing to work through your NO CHOICE situations. 'Intuitive Eating' has great appeal, but it doesn't work for me. My guess is that my intuition around food has been overwhelmed by associating food with every feeling that comes along. [Yep, Welcome Freely is back there.]

millie56 - HUGE Kudos for "I DID NOT EAT OVER IT." Volumetrics is so intuitively a good idea.

Readers -
Quote:
day 15 Monitor Your Eating
Once I accept the fact that I have to monitor
my eating in this way, dieting will be easier.
Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 148.
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Old 05-14-2014, 02:38 PM   #120
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Hi Coaches!

Our trip over the Continental Divide was safe and we turned off our water systems before we had any damage, stopped for a quick soak at the hot springs and were home by 9 WITHOUT stopping for any fast foods which might have been the convenient option. Credit. Now that we past by the highest elevation Whole Foods enroute (at 9075 ft), we DO, however, always have a healthy and convenient option. Yay. Upon returning home I enjoyed my salmon salad, homemade guacamole and a serving of yummy organic tortilla chips.

Stress abounds and I find myself constantly reminding myself of my successful dieting skills which become stronger every day I practice them. Yesterday was an off plan day, which I actually "planned" and executed. It was well thought out and did not include any junk food, candy, fast food, or fried food. I simply took my food choices upstairs to the bedroom and read and surfed while DH watched his favorite crabbers from Alaska. My food choices were an instant PadThai (organic and vegan) just add water, a portion of guacamole and chips, and 2 (TWO) vegan superfood muffins from Sprouts, which were OK but I wouldn't buy again. WHFoods vegan blueberry are much better and I know better than to bring them home. So credit for much better choices than in the past.

Today I'm back on track with my smoothie and I'm going to take myself to lunch in Denver (yes I'm solo) as I take the pup to his cute and very intelligent Veterinary Cardiologist. She brings tears to my eyes...she looks/dresses like she is 20 and she takes such great care of our pup. I am blessed.

I haven't had time to decide where to lunch-it will be after the pup's appointment. I had so many other things to do on my 1st day off but it was spent writing up paperwork to deliver to our new tenants (from Feb.1) who are growing pot in a bedroom of the rental unit in a pretty big (and unsafe) manner, even though their lease prohibits it. (Yay me!) I don't like confrontation so credit for walking myself through the steps, which were much more reasonable than my mom's solution, which was to send in the troopers and have them forcibly removed. LOL.

OK, now I have to breathe and let that go and find some non-obsessive enjoyment in my day.
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