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Beck Diet For Life/Solution – May 2014 – Support, Discussion, Buddy/Coach

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Old 05-19-2014, 10:17 AM   #166
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Thumbs up success skills 3 and 4: eat sitting down & give yourself credit.

Coaches

I'm combining these two success skills as I regularly give myself credit, and have for a long time now.The eat slowly, sitting down, savouring every bite needs work though. And going ahead to success skill #5: get moving seems/feels overwhelming today even though I have begun to do just that. But I am in danger of rushing through and need to SLOW DOWN and take this in, work the spots that are troublesome and then move forward. I am *super anxious* to get to her foodplan as I have never done it before. I want to try it an get on with this weightloss already..... but that's already happening too as I weighed in *credit* and saw a drop of 0.9 this morning. Great. Good.
I also checked in with my sister *credit* and committed my plan to her and have checked in here with my forever coaches here in my Beck "forever home".

oooooooo I hear a woodpecker! Wow! I wondered if we might get them as we had so much tree damage during the ice storm at Xmas that we still have piles of branches for the town to take up and many, many, many trees have been de-limbed=perfect woodpecker homes! Nice.

Today is a day of R & R: reading and relaxation. The only thing on the agenda outside of that is try to inflate my bicycle tires with a hand pump I bought at the dollar store. If that doesn't work I'll walk the bike over to the gas station and pump the tires up that way. That could *gasp* force me to ride it home though. Am I ready for that? I'm not sure if I am. *credit for considering it*

ACTION ITEMS

-weigh yourself today YES
-eat only sitting down, slowly, savouring every bite YES 99%. I did nibble on a few veggies in a colander while I prepared dinner to see if they were thawed and then stopped myself as soon as I realized I was eating standing up
-drink a glass of water before every mealYES
-no sugar todayYES
-move 5 minutes on purpose today YES! I rode my bike around the block. I felt freeeeeeeeeeee!
-close the kitchen at 8pmYES
-give myself creditYES
-check in with coaches YES
-no secondsYES
-read advantage and response cards YES
-fill out skills sheet in green book at end of the dayYES

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Old 05-19-2014, 10:53 AM   #167
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Hello Coaches,

Quick post here because I am hungry and I want to go get something to eat. Deep breath: Hunger is never an emergency. I'll have breakfast first thing tomorrow. Some fizzy water sounds good. I don't want to make my giving muscle stronger, I want it to atrophy. (Sabotaging thought: But I'm doing so well. And I am really am hungry. And I've already lost 2 pounds his week.) (Response: Then keep on doing well. So what. And you know the scale is a fickle mistress). Ok, have my water, urge is gone. Thanks for providing this place for me (us).

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Old 05-19-2014, 12:22 PM   #168
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Good Morning, Coaches.

Weight at ticker. Food logged. The computer says I am OP yet I lose no weight. I know from past experience this means I need to get more honest about BLT (Bites, licks, tastes.) Still, credit for giving myself a break. I have not gained and don't feel like I am spiraling out of control like I did last month. I am eating lots of fruits and veggies which is a good thing. I will continue to track this week as I have and make adjustments next week. Tomorrow through Sunday is my last BIG push at work and my goal is just to maintain. Thank goodness weightloss, like hunger, at this point is not an emergency. I still fit in my clothes, can exercise comfortably and continue to sleep well.

flnu: Congrats on your continued weightless. You must be getting close to goal. At 5'6, my healthy BMI is 154.

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Old 05-19-2014, 12:24 PM   #169
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Quick post just so I don't lose my place here! Still logging. Starting to think it's time to actually look at the data I'm getting and make some decisions in response to that so I can nudge the average below 2000 calories because that's not a number that's going to get me where I want to go. We've got an overnight out-of-town trip this week and I bought plane tickets for England trip over the weekend. Part of what's going on with me, right now, is I'm not really centered in the place that I am. I'm not sure that's entirely a bad thing, but a bit disorienting.

WI: NA kg, Exercise: +60 830/1500 minutes for May, Food: 100% op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes
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Old 05-20-2014, 12:22 AM   #170
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Today was a 10/10 on the stress scale. Some good, some bad. Continue to be thankful that my brother and I work together so well with parental care. Faced a very emotional situation with parents today regarding sister and mom was nearly vomiting from stress at dealing with it (relaying info).

I need to get some "release it" thoughts to accept the thought, then release it, when middle-of-the-night worries encroach concerning her. Anyone have suggestions for mantras or what have you that bring peace to emotionally charged family situations?

Food could have been better. Not a lot but not too nutritional. Dinner was rushed and late and non-creative as the discussion ran long.

Keeping fingers crossed that dad can get some sleep tonight. I will not be functioning tomorrow without some deep sleep.
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Old 05-20-2014, 01:32 AM   #171
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Hello this fine Monday, coaches!

My calorie levels are a bit on the high side, still on plan-but high, and my exercise on the low side with just walking pup and not doing my DVD. Good news is I won't gain, bad news is I probably won't loose a pound this week and my scale doesn't measure 10ths so no progress shown. Not that I am going to give up, just acknowledging that in this stressful week that maintenance is good. Have to be up early tomorrow and across town for the first of oldest ds's 3 tests this week...the furthest away but the shortest. Then he has two AP exams later in the week.

When I'm done typing, off to walk pup once more and to bed!

nationalparker
I don't even know what to say to be an encouragement to you. It is awesome that you are there for your parents and helping out. It is horrid that the stress is so bad and that your sister is not helping. Wishing you peace and rest.

gardenerjoy
I'm in the same place this week. Elsewhere upstairs and 2000 calorie days. Wishing you an awesome trip to England! Fun

maryann Those BLTs, not good! Hang in there during this busy week!

flnu Kudos for working that resistance muscle and using water to distract!

onebyone Woodpeckers are so interesting. Wishing you a great R&R day.

BillBlueEyes DS built a Rubik's Cube solver with his Lego EV3...the only way any of us enjoy solving the puzzle. Hoping you heal and are able to get back OP with exercise and food...being sick stinks especially when it lingers the tired sinks to the bones.

GosfordGirl/Cheryl Congrats for finishing the grading. Hope you feel better enough to head to the gym.

Beck FB Monday Motivation: You can’t undo any eating from the past, you can only control what you do eat in the future so there’s no point in berating yourself for past mistakes. Instead, focus on what you can do to make TODAY’s eating a success and you will feel so glad that you did.
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Old 05-20-2014, 05:47 AM   #172
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Coaches

I am still feeling seedy - my ears are gurgling - not a good sign. And I am tired - and I didn't get to gym. Will try xylitol tonight and see how it goes. I am having an easy evening and will go to bed early to rejuvenate. A 2 week push to get through this phase of work and then a bit of respite. We are having the longest stretch of days in May over 22 or 23 for like forever (12d) and it is going out to 18d - so much for Autumn. A spot of rain would be good. I have had a reasonable food day - I didn't have what I intended for lunch - and should have because it was a bit of a waste of calories. Will do better for dinner and tomorrow. Politics here is certainly interesting here - might not be able to afford to eat soon anyway

BillBE - I agree - the less I exercise the less mindful I am of healthful eating and living. Hope you get there soon

Nationalparker - I no know mantras that work without some sort of conditioning history that you can slip into the zone quickly. I can't offer anything which I would love to. Just know that there are people out her concerned for you and you family. It is awful that your sister's problems are affecting your mother's health

Onebyone - Credit for riding around the block and staying on track with your goals - great effort

Flnu - hope the hunger stayed at bay - credit for reaching out

Maryann - I love BLT - great thing too avoid! Hope you get through the week

Tricia (in AZ) - Your life is as busy as usual - and you have consistently lost weight and it will keep going - awsome - just a little pause

Waving at Gardenerjoy, Debbie (Lexxiss), CeeJay - take care

Have a good day coaches
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Old 05-20-2014, 07:10 AM   #173
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Thumbs up Tuesday

Diet Coaches/Buddies – Short walk, CREDIT moi, to my brick and mortar drug dealer to buy magic elixir and cough drops. While wandering, I found Florida blueberries at a good seasonal price so grabbed a pint. Makes me look forward to breakfast. DW gave in and bought some peaches grown in California; they're too hard to eat today - maybe someday, LOL.

I did three meals and a California Navel Orange for evening snack - as planned, CREDIT moi. Back on track from the diversion of the day before. The scale says that one day of minor over eating produced a one pound gain. I've become an avid believer in the placebo effect as well as the reverse-placebo effect to the extent that I believe my mind caused that reading on the scale. That's the best explanation I can think of for a one pound gain when I'm feeling guilty about a few hundred calories.


onebyone – Super Kudos for "YES! I rode my bike around the block. I felt freeeeeeeeeeee!" Yay for Woodpeckers to connect us to world out there.

Joy (gardenerjoy) – Kudos for committing to your trip to England by buying the tickets. Smart to think in advance about your overnight trip.

Cheryl (GosfordGirl) – Yep, bed is the place to take that "seedy" feeling. Sending supportive thoughts to get through your two week push.

maryann - So easy to overlook the "BLT (Bites, licks, tastes.)" Kudos for choosing a sane approach to your final BIG push at school.

nationalparker – Here's some Sandman images to help you get some much-deserved sleep. Kudos for using the strategy of writing down the frustrating interaction with your sister even just to delete it - there seems to be value in just getting it out. Sending thoughts for comfort to both of your parents during stressful times. I have no mantra to offer. Only thought is to try to remember to focus on the current situation since, in my family, discussions always carry the full negative powers of all of childhood.

Tricia (AZtricia) - Kudos for clear thinking, "in this stressful week that maintenance is good." [I want me a Lego EV3 - are grownups allowed?]

flnu - Gotta love this, "I don't want to make my giving-in muscle stronger, I want it to atrophy." Thanks for the thinking process of the Sabotaging Thought that doing well justifies eating.

Readers -
Quote:
day 16 Prevent Unplanned Eating
You made a plan, and you'll follow
that plan -
no ifs, ands, or buts.
Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Beck Diet Solution (Pink book), pg 149.
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Old 05-20-2014, 08:09 AM   #174
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Hi Coaches!

Yesterday was OP and healthy. credit. Exercise was work. I still love getting paid to exercise. I'm still finding myself short on time, especially in the mornings. I think I've figured it out LOL. DH quit smoking last November when he caught a cold. He hasn't smoked since. He has so much energy AND his new morning habit is to hang out with me....talking and drinking coffee. In the "old days" he was ready to head to his shop bright and early so he could "puff", an activity not acceptable in the house. I wonder why I didn't figure this out sooner.

nationalparker, I send you cyber hugs and don't really have a helpful word for you. My coworker was in the same position a year ago and the days (and nights) were just super tough....no way around it. I do know that with my family members (and personalities) that when I do my best and accept that the rest of them are just how they are, I find my best serenity. I cannot change the relationship between my mother and other siblings, that is their business. It's got to be super frustrating when a Sis isn't able to fall into the groove with the precious present, but you are, and that's a great thing. Take care!

Cheryl(GosfordGirl) and BBE, canned salmon has again found a precious spot in my life. I got that "craving" about a month ago and right now it's on our list of favorites. Canned salmon was a ritual during my many years in Alaska. Subsistence food. Healthy. When fresh, red salmon is a better choice. It grills/cooks much nicer....gourmet. It also has a bit better nutritional value with regards to the healthy oils. I chose pink salmon for my salmon salad. IT's half the price and I can buy it canned from Alaska (wild). I use one large can, draining a little juice for the pup. I mix in just enough vegan mayo to hold it together a bit. I finely dice carrots, celery and red onion....put a bit of dill and finish it with SF pickle relish. In my opinion, it doesn't get much better! Last night I just had my serving with a green salad but I made DH a grilled sammie with melted cheddar. He was totally happy, too.

It's 5:25 and I have 5 minutes to get to work. Credit for checking in.

Take care everyone!
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Old 05-20-2014, 11:55 AM   #175
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Hello Coaches,

Good day here except I didn’t get my exercise. Oh well. Tennis tomorrow. OP today. And bed by 10 the last three days (ok bed by close-enough-to-count the last three days).

I finished Diet Fix. For me, the main messages were making clear the inverse relationship between hunger and will power, that I can’t make up for skipping breakfast at lunch, and that I must enjoy life while losing weight. I struggle with understanding the last one. Do I enjoy life while losing weight? Mostly. I’m definitely not miserable or white-knuckling it (last night notwithstanding). Would I enjoy things more if I could eat whatever I want whenever I want? Sometimes but not always. How much offsetting enjoyment is there in weighing 30 pounds less? Hard to say. I don’t know how well I’m hitting the “enjoy it enough” mark. I think I’m there but I guess it’ll get clearer when I get to maintenance.

Maryann: Thanks for your support. I’m glad you’re feeling not out of control. I hate that feeling. My next five pound goal takes me to a normal weight BMI at 159. My ultimate goal weight for maintenance is 145 with 150 being the uh-oh point. But I would be well satisfied to settle anywhere <160 if that turns out to be easier to maintain.

More questions for maintainers: How did you decide your maintenance range? Did you change your target ever? Did you make any intentional behavioral changes when you went from dieting to maintaining?

Joy: Enjoy England! Diet-wise, may I ask where you want to go? I’ll look forward to hearing your analysis of your data.

Nationalparker: I hope you and your dad both got some rest. I have experienced immense tragedy and I’ve found that suffering is just suffering. It’s not so fearful. I don’t know if that is helpful, or whether I am expressing it clearly, but that is what I have come to understand. It doesn’t scare me anymore. I can and will suffer.

Tricia: Yep. Any week I don’t gain is a good week.

Cheryl: Hope you are in the pink soon. Credit for keeping on despite feeling crappy.

Bill. We just went through this with the peaches. Rock hard peaches get mealy not delicious. (I just don’t want you to be disappointed.) I am totally the same way about believing the scale reflects my personal scoring system rather than what my body actually weighs.

Debbie R: Huge credit to Mr. Debbie R for quitting. And LOL for finally figuring out what’s happened to your mornings. Hope you made it to work.

Good night, all.
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Old 05-20-2014, 03:16 PM   #176
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A HUGE thank you to everyone here for keeping me a bit saner My sister is 13 years older than me and we didn't grow up at all together - perhaps 4-5 years or so ... and we couldn't be more different. She has "feuds" with neighbors, retired early to leave her coworkers as, of course, they were all incompetent, feuds with people is hobby groups, year-long fights with family (myself included, but I initiated that complete break for a year). I am now recognzing that when my parents are no longer here, I most likely will not reach out with very much personal contact. I suppose my mind is saying, you can deal with this because it's not forever. Just for NOW. Again, thank you for enduring these posts

In retrospect, I think the biggest eating change when I was here before might not have been no snacks - because I realize I DID have some ... but that the eating was at ALL hours - breakfast not until 11 instead of 7, lunch skipped some days, dinner at all hours. Maybe changing things up made a difference?? Or else the weight loss gods just said, she's been trying for a few years now, just give her a gift. ha ha... Then they took it back. I shall reclaim that.
Aiming to check in tonight with personals. I am looking forward to that, so I hope I can take the time.
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Old 05-20-2014, 03:32 PM   #177
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Keeping track of calories has made one big difference for me. I’m no longer turning small problems into big ones. It’s solved my tendency to catastrophize by presenting cold, hard data that says the mis-step wasn’t as bad as I think it was. This is excellent, but it has a downside, too. Now that I know I can keep problems in check, I’m less motivated to keep them from happening in the first place. So, I’m not having any really bad days, but I’m not having any really good ones either.

Next step, analyze the data to figure out what makes for the best days and see what I can do to build from those.

WI: NA kg, Exercise: +30 860/1500 minutes for May, Food: 80% op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

nationalparker: The song "Let it Go" from Frozen has been helpful to me lately for releasing things. Also, working my way through the Serenity Prayer -- what can I change and what cannot be changed? What will improve if I accept the reality of the situation?
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Old 05-20-2014, 04:00 PM   #178
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Popped up on FB today:
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Old 05-20-2014, 05:45 PM   #179
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Talking success skill#5 - get moving

Coaches:

Yesterday afternoon my day morphed into a "hungry day". Wow I was STARVING. Well, I wasn't *really* starving but I was very hungry all night and at bedtime and during the night when I got up to feed Caesar. Being that hungry causes feelings of fear to rise in me. I found myself dwelling on thoughts of "what happens after we die?" Sheesh. I feel all shaky and uncertain. It happens quite predictably when I am physically empty. Eating something never solves fear. So why bother.... well eating the cookie gets my mind off of the fear and into the very familiar hamster wheel of thought that tells me I shouldn't have eaten, I blew it, I can't do it, &etc. My challenge is to feel the fear and to let it happen. Feelings are not facts. They are feelings. Emotions. I didn't give in and when I got up I didn't rush to eat, though I was still very hungry. I gave myself the time to weigh myself (a -1.5lb drop). I told myself to slow down when I did eat. I sat down and savoured it, and while I was still faster eating than I would have wanted to be, it was slower than before so credit. The fear had dissipated by morning and I'm happy to have gone through the whole thing without resorting to excess food to soothe myself.

A few hours ago I came home from the ceramic guild and ate my planned lunch: leftovers (KUDOS for having leftovers since we no longer have seconds for dinner! YAy! One less meal to cook!). Then I watched a tv show (Madmen) and then I played a video game and then I wanted a nap. I felt sooooo tired. But then I thought
Quote:
if I have a nap I won't ride that bike cause DH will come home and then we'll be here together and more people will be outside and then a day will go by without me riding my bike and I won't ride it again for a long long time.
There are some sabotaging thoughts in that run-on sentence but basically I tried to nap but the bike thing nagged at me and I knew it would until I did it, so I got up and did it. I feel I need to wear a cover-up jacket to try to disguise my body (I'm working on this) so, for now, I did that and then I was off. I rode to the entrance to the park at the opposite end of my block, then timed it: 3min. Wow. Short. So then I entered the park and rode to the end of the park. Hmmm. 3 more minutes. And that's where the community centre with the pool is so I already know I can make it there to go swimming (omg omg omg) and am pretty sure I can swim and ride home too. This would be an excellent workout for me a couple of days a week and it looks like I can do that sooner rather than later! All I need is a bike lock so I can leave my bike when I go inside. So exercise was a planned 5min and it stretched to 11min. I pushed myself to go as fast as I could all the way home. Thank goodness our neighborhood streets are so empty of traffic.

ACTION ITEMS

-weigh yourself today YES down -1.5
-eat only sitting down, slowly, savouring every bite YES
-drink a glass of water before every mealYES
-no sugar todayYES
-move 5 minutes on purpose today YES! I rode my bike through the park and back!
-spontaneous exercise? YES did more on bike than I had planned cause it felt good.
-close the kitchen at 8pmYES
-give myself creditYES
-check in with coaches YES
-no secondsYES
-read advantage and response cards YES
-fill out skills sheet in green book at end of the dayYES

Last edited by onebyone : 05-21-2014 at 02:47 PM.
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Old 05-20-2014, 08:17 PM   #180
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Credit me - just for getting on here and checking in. Doctor appointment was very discouraging. Told me my hip pain will be chronic for the rest of my life even said weight loss or water aerobics wouldn't help at all (WHAT!!!) it is a joint that isn't working right won't less weight help? Didn't have a written food plan for the day and I didn't do well for the evening. Made a sandwich before taking my DH to Bible Study/Pot luck and went to my step study which got done early so I went to the Bible Study - delicious brownies and I ate 2. Then got home and started on a box of Wheat Thins snacking basically until bedtime. So I am here and checking in instead of hiding and dropping out. Read my Advantage List today and the card with thought - Nothing I do will make a difference and Response - That's not true everything I do makes a difference. So getting back and accepting my slip as not the end but just an Oops and a bump in the road. Will write my food plan down at 9:00 pm tonight so it is completed before my bedtime routine and the follow it tomorrow. One day at a time as I can't change the past. Thanks for all your support I need it right now. DH wants us to wait 2 week to start water aerobics program and I will be seeing a chiropractor to try and get some relief from my hip pain soon.
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