Day 34: Solve Problems
This is one of those skills that keeps on getting better the more that you practice it. I have really fallen back daily/weekly using this day over and over. I just like how Dr. Beck presents this in her usual matter-of-fact manner. What I especially like about applying CBT to just about anything is that you remove all of the emotion from most decisions and when you do that you aren't "reacting" but being "proactive"; which I think is the model that we are all aiming for. This has been one day that my life in general has benefited from the most.
Hey, I only have 7 days left of this book's daily bullet points and then I will present what OP is now
for me (rather than what it was even a couple of weeks ago) and then I will settle down in just doing it. I have been formulating and re-formulating what I need to do to make my goals "happen". I returned here again because what I was doing was working "some of the time". I want to make it work 80-90% of the time so I am not working on losing weight two or three years from now. Reconnecting with the Beck Diet Solution has grounded me again--which I really needed. TG I was "lead" here once more and that I was "open to following". Credit moi for that!
I think you were as OP as a person could be when you honestly don't know what a particular venue will serve. We have yet another holiday get together (this time food and drink centered entirely along with good conversations among old friends) this coming weekend. When I asked what I could bring and the reply was "fresh fruit", I was happy to oblige.
to you for making the best decisions on the spur of the moment. Having a plan in our minds helps steer around the buffet table and I personally think that is how we "survive" the unknown.
Well, I have come a very very long way from my old days of compulsive overeating but I still have not arrived as I would like to. I would say that I am 75% of where I want to be in this area. One of my persistent sabotaging thoughts is that "I am having a very tough time and therefore this is one area that I can relax a little." Well, that thought has kept me stalled because that "tough time"
has not only been there but will probably be there for an undetermined amount of time so I am going to really have to quit using tough times as an excuse to be sloppy with how I eat. Period. End of the story. I need to practice my resistance muscle
even when I want to bawl ---loudly. I am not a weak person so I don't know why in this area I act like one sometimes.
I really do want to be victorious in this area. I want the rest of the world to know me as I know me. I can do this. So can you. We just have to believe we can.
BTW, Dukan is a diet plan formulated by a Dr. Dukan (I think he is a doctor) that was all the rage in Europe back when Princess Kate was preparing for her wedding two years ago. I don't know what foods or anything else about it other than that a lot of people have tried it and, I guess, like it.
I saw an episode of Bizarre Foods on the Travel channel with Andrew Zimmerman, here in the States, and he visited Australia while there was a food festival going on celebrating all of those foods you mentioned. Since my food plan does involve counting calories I am just wondering if any of those food items would be found on any of the apps around.
Andrew said that kangaroo meat is greasy and tastes like wild game here in the States. "Survival meat"
turned nouveau cuisine
. I love it!
I don't know if you have either of the Beck books but she does cover cravings and eating off plan well. Reading those may help you in your quest right now.
I have said before that cravings for me come down to what I eat (read: too many carbs). Keeping my carbs low and the protein high (which it sounds like her diet in the second book is similar) is my key to not craving sweets in general. As for "off planned" eating...."out of sight, out of mind" at home and when I am out, making sure that I do not arrive at any restaurant super hungry. I see this program as developing a sort of "mind control" over this particular area of our life. Ideally, it is removing both the compulsive and the impulsive aspects of our behavior when it comes to food consumption.
bethfromdayton: Major Credit
for being OP 6 days in a row. Great job in planning out your meals and your days as well. You are doing great! I have always found that pre-planning lunches away from home is a big help. I too have found that structured routine is the best way to develop good and sound habits. I joined a sleep challenge run by another site this past summer and now bedtime is no later than 1 a.m. My exercise schedule is M-W-F --cardio and Tu-Th-Sat --strength workouts. So, now all I have to do is see what day of week it is and I know what I am "supposed" to do. Good Luck
with finding out what works for you and then working it!
I am so sorry that things did not work out as you had planned and hoped. I too have had some major disappointments in this area and I have learned to "walk the walk" in this area of my life now more than ever. I could write a "War and Peace" post on this past year alone but I won't. Aren't you all happy?
I did join you on your new thread. We can do this! One day at a time.
Great (continued) Job on your streaking. I think you must be on cruise control at this point. Your talk of oranges has got me thinking about seeing what is available locally here. I am more of an apple person but those are long gone so I am on a search now.
Thank you everyone for the condolences regarding my expression of disappointment regarding moving. The cliff notes version is that we are small business owners and between the government shutdown and the presentation of the new AHCA our customers are overwhelmed emotionally (and my guess financially) and our source of income has nearly dried up at a time when our income is 3x what it is right now. Then, add to the fact that my DH (whom I love dearly) has gotten repeated traffic violations (his office is his car) and so he is on probation as well as taking time out of his work schedule to sit with a probation officer; which is just plain ridiculous and is humiliating to him besides. This is the only law this man has ever broken in his entire life and as a person who has had a history of chronic depression it has been very difficult on him. He is feeling very persecuted.
For anyone who is familiar with mental illness (which both my DH and I have a long shared history of), stress is something we have to be especially careful of. If it gets too much, it can really overwhelm us and cause us to make very poor cognitive choices. I suspect that my DH is going through some patchy periods of just struggling and so I am carrying the load emotionally right now in our relationship. He has been a gent of the highest degree in the past for me so this is absolutely no sacrifice on my part. We are tight. We cover each other's backs at all times.
As for me, the family financial manager, I have to "let go, let go, let go"
. When we were out in traffic a week ago and he repeated the same offense that got him a whopping $750 fine, I said, "Now, I understand why you got pulled over." He was hurt by my comments but I stand by them. Anyway, I had to turn down an ideal property simply because of all of this. Most is not anything we have done (the government stuff) but at a time when we need to be careful the traffic violation hurt, I won't deny that.
Credit with me that I kept my temper although I did cry. Even more credit with me that I didn't do my "usual" (ForMyGirls
this is why I am joining you) is to slap this unexpected expense on a credit card or something like that but instead we are paying it in installments so we aren't borrowing any more. That is definitely a new way of handling problems for me/us and one that I am doing my best to stick to. So, food is not my only issue
right now that I am struggling with. So, is a mountain of debt.
This is why I really embrace this particular Day more than any of them because this is where I "excel" (credit moi again). Drop the "victim" role, cease the "pity party" and just plain figure out how to deal with it in the most rational and acceptable way. As Dr. Beck says, "If you can't solve the problem, then release it. Some problems weren't meant to be solved." I would add, "at this time". That is a lot to sit with at times but I have been practicing that and it gives me a lot more serenity and peace of mind when I do what I can and then "let go" of what I can't.
Is this Exercise Challenge a monthly one and is it ongoing into 2014? If it is I might join your group. Although I don't have trouble keeping up my exercise in general it still would help me meet another goal. I just was surfing in another area that I report and came across another short term challenge that I joined (impulsively of course
) so I have a new ticker on my signature page. I might as well add a couple more before it is all said and done.
I am just so excited that I am almost finished with reading this book and I feel ready to make a list of what OP is for.
To all of the readers and lurkers who pop in from time to time, hope things are well on your end of the stick.
Take care, Pam
if you have the book read about getting back on track. We love you. We are here for you. You are doing great. TY for checking in and give yourself credit for your honesty and humility.